Motivations for having or not having children?

Question

Whats your motivation for making the choice of having or not having children?

What would you say is your strongest motivation?...your weakest?

What was the most difficult part of your decision ?

If you had to do it over again would your decision be the same?
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you can answer in 1 word or write whatever you want.

I need at least 4 peoples opinions please...it's for a psychology class.

Also, if you can specify if your older or younger.
older being late 30's and up
younger being early 30's and lower

***Your answers will be used in a college presentation***

THANK YOU SO MUCH!

Answer 1

Like many people, I'm finding it difficult to put into words in any way that sounds anything other than....stupid. At some point in my life I found I just really *wanted* to have children -- I wanted very much to be a mother, with all that entails, and I wanted to be charged with the awesome responsibility of raising a person to, hopefully, be a responsible adult who can make a positive difference in the world (whether that be the world at large or "just" in the world/life of another individual). I wanted to see a person develop, watch a child grow and explore. Etc., etc. Honestly, I think no matter what someone says the motivation was, for most people the answer to that is largely artifice -- for most people, the decision to have a child doesn't reside in reason. In any event, I just *wanted* it. That yearning was my strongest motivation, and I guess you could say that any articulable "rational" reason was my weakest -- that, or anything having to do with "that's what women do."

The most difficult part of my decision was probably the "how," as I ended up struggling with repeat miscarriages and it wasn't clear whether it was in the cards to have children who are biologically "mine." I then also had to examine the motivation for the "how" as I faced the options of medical intervention (which might or might not have worked) or the pursuit of adoption, and a range of options on the spectrum as well.

If I had to do it again every aspect of my decision would be the same, from the initial decision to have children, to the pursuit of treatment when it wasn't happening. Right now, I'm a SAHM with toddler twins, and it's the most difficult job I've ever had, but by far the most fun and the most rewarding, and I wouldn't trade it for anything in the world.

I'm "older" now, and was at the time we were trying to have children, and had them.

Hope that helps. Good luck with the presentation.

Answer 2

Whats your motivation for making the choice of having or not having children?

Honestly, it is hard to put into words. The longing you feel inside for kids is just unexplainable. It's like eating when you are hungry or sleeping when you are tired. You just want/need a baby and you have tunnel vision when it comes to reaching your goal!

What would you say is your strongest motivation?...your weakest?

Strongest: To have a family, a child to love and care for.

Weakest: Along with wanting another child more than anything and wanting another one just as much as the first one, I did not want my daughter to be an only child and think that the world revolved around her.

What was the most difficult part of your decision ?

Being secure that my husband and I were financially able to care for a child and that we were ready for this step in our lives.

If you had to do it over again would your decision be the same?

It depends what day you ask me! Seriously, absolutely. I'd do it all over again to have my kids. They are everything to me.

I fall into the "older" category currently, however, I was in your other age bracket at the time I was conceiving and giving birth if that matters (age 26-30).

Answer 3

Neither of my children were planned but I have always wanted children so it didn't matter. I like the idea of working as a unit (the family) and being able to instill (without forcing) my beliefs in someone else and see someone I helped to create grow up and turn into a person. I started when I was 19 and I don't really know if that has affected my outlook or not but being a parent has made me a much better person. The hardest part is knowing that some day they will be able to handle things (for the most part) on their own and leave me.

Answer 4

I am a younger female who decided not to have children. My strongest motivation was the fact that I just do not like children. My weakest motivation was the money factor (as in, I don't have a lot). The only difficult part of my decision was my biological clock going TICK TICK TICK. My body wants to reproduce, but my mind has enough sense not to. What really stops my biological clock dead in its tracks is when I go to work and the screaming little shiits come in and go wild. If I had a child, and it did that, I would spank it until it couldn't sit down. None of this namby-pamby time-out bullshiit.

But, I don't have to worry about that, because I don't have any children. I have godchildren, but they're teenagers now, so I like them much better. :-)

Answer 5

Im under 30.
I will have kids when im older.

I want to keep the family genes going on, as well as the family name.
Great memories, teaching them to ride bikws, to drive, play sports with.
To mold someone into a contributing member of society cuz we definately need less dumbasses in the world.
Have someone to take care of you when your older .
You need kids to have grandkids.
Family is the most important thing is the world. They will always be there for you, money wont, friends wont. Blood is thicker than water.

Answer 6

I am younger and I am almost certain I don't want kids. For me there are many more cons than pros. I defintaly don't want them now, I don't like responsibility, I need my freedom, I don't like kids, I don't like the family vibe and I just don't feel like I need children to be happy. But I know in the future I might regret it, but I still don't think that's enough motivation for me to have them. I wish society didn't make it seem so horrible if u decide not to have kids, it makes me second think which I don't want to do

Answer 7

So far have had none, and not trying to at that, truthfully i love kids, i just dislike the world in which i would have to bring them up in so its more out of compassion that i do not bring children into this life, the human species is way to overpopulated as it is, to many people they feel life is such a blessing, to me in the reality in which i am forced to face due to the fact that i cannot convince myself of things just to make me happy, life is a constant struggle, you have a little fun and you bust your *** and get a lot of dissapointment, all in all your lucky if you break even in the end and then we all perish anyways.

Answer 8

I am 41, and my girlfriend is 36. Both of us decided young that we didn't want children.

We both had to raise a younger sibling or cousin, when we were young. We where both done parenting by 12.

We don't need the headache. We just want to go on trips without the buren, and expence of children.

Answer 9

Freedom - with kids come restrictions and limitations that some people can't handle. You're life revolves around caring for them and being there for them, and it takes spontaneity out of your life. I'm younger & good luck!

Answer 10

(im in my early teens) i cant imagine not having kids! i want 4 but i dont like the giving birth bit and it will be super expensive and it can be extremly hard i can imagine but it will all be worth it to see them grow up and have children of thier own and carry on the family
they will lbe good to you when your old and helpless if you were good to them wehen they were little and helpless