Husband has a porn addiction?

Question

He masterbates in front of the computer every day to very disturbing porn sites. I have told him how upsetting this is to me and that I think it is VERY wrong - especially since he has me - a VERY willing sex partner. I wouldn't mind watching it with him - but he waits until I am out of the house to go online to get off. Some of these sites are horrific - and it really hurts me and scare me a bit - but he just laughs at me. WHAT DO I DO!?!?

Answer 1

You need to try marriage counseling. His addiction to porn is definitely a problem, but the fact that he has no respect for your feelings about this makes it worse. I don't think this is something you can do on your own, so definitely try to get some professional help. You can also check out this website - http://www.safefamilies.org/forspouses.php
It is a site that has information for wives who have husbands with porn addictions. Last, but not least, you can always pray. God listens! :)

One more thing: even though you said you'd be willing to watch it with him, I would try to avoid that. He may use your body while he's watching the porn, but that won't help his addiction. Don't get too discouraged--there is always hope! :)

Answer 2

2

Answer 3

Watch with him? Use it to make your sex life with your husband better? OR let it ruin your marriage! ! ! ! AN ADDICTION = Choosing to do it over regular daily activities! SO if he is missing work and spending all the money on porn and doesn't leave the house except to purchase new porn THEN he might have an addiction! My guess? He enjoys it! He isn't "addicted" to it. Just so it wouldn't be my opinion I looked up the Websters Definition: "to devote or surrender oneself to something habitually or obsessively" SO has he "devoted and surrendered" to porn yet? I like the guy below who says it is a "habit" I think that is more accurate with men and porn! ! They are not addicted it is just a habit and if it annoys the wife they should attempt to kick the habit! ! ! Just my opinion but don't use ADDICTION

Answer 4

Do something different. Change your appearance, style etc., to surprise him. Sex after a long relationship or marriage gets quickly old. You need to come up with spontaneous ideas to keep the fire going. Men who masturbate too much or addicted to porn , after sometime won't get much interest in having real sex. Or even if they do, they may have premature ejaculation and other issues.

So , as a woman, now it's your duty to seduce him and bring him back. Do something crazy. Roleplay, throw a surprise intimate sex party for two of you at your home and take him by his balls.

Offer him kinky sex, but in portions. Don't give all of it in one run. Give a little and make him want more. Men get spoiled and bored when they know they can get anything they want anytime.

True success in life is not about running away from problems, but solving them.

Answer 5

i am so sorry. as with these situations, it is not your fault he has this addiction ok?? i know it is hard to realize this, even though you are likely a very willing and horny wife. Me too. My husband also has a porn addiction.

BUT he has been attending a support group at a church since he got busted. We are very open and honest with each other about it all, and i have software on the computer that he agreed to having on here - and it blocks porn sites and records every site he goes to.

The point is: my husband is willing and motivated to cut his addiction off to keep our marriage healthy. He said that if I hadn't helped him realize this, his addiction would have grown into something more nasty - like using prostitutes and gay sex (even though he isn't homosexual). The porn addict is double-minded even when he wants to change.

The question for you is: Is your husband willing to change. He knows it hurts you. Perhaps he doesn't understand.

Finding out if he is willing to change is the first step.

If he is not, honestly, I would leave him.

Answer 6

Let's see, he's doing something by himself when you are not around. Since he is not involving anyone else, why should you care? Don't you think you're being a little selfish and controling? You even admit you dislike the porn he looks at. It only makes sense that he respectfully chooses to do it while out of your presence. How can you possibly be hurt by this? He's not doing anything to you other than being respectful with his personal happy time. Trying being understanding and supportive for a change.

Answer 7

That's tough. It's normal for guys to like pr0n, and practically every guy looks at it to one degree or another (or lies about it), and has a little "alone time" from time to time (or lies about it), even if the sex life is otherwise healthy.

But every day? That IS an addiction. You're doing all the right things: being a receptive, willing partner, offering to "participate," and letting him know how much it hurts you. Beyond that, he might need some counseling (probably couples counseling is a good place to start).

Answer 8

An "addiction" is a strong term. Does he miss work to stay home and watch porn? Does he spend your life savings on porn sites? Does he disregard personal hygiene because he can't get away from porn long enough to bathe and brush his teeth and change clothes? THESE ARE THINGS THAT ADDICTS DO! ! !

So if you hubby jacks off two or three times a day to a little porn on the computer that is NOT and addiction. Just a habit!

Answer 9

I totally understand. My husband and I have fought over this so many times. He isn't willing to change and doesn't understand why it bothers me. He says all men do it. Fine whatever but when it's affecting your spouse and your marriage then I consider it an addiction too. Mine sneaks to do it, he lies, he has passwords on the computer so I can't see what he looks at, he hardly wants to have sex and when he does it's not intimate at all, I could go on and on about the problems that it causes. When it affects your marriage it's a problem. I love my husband and this is our only issue. I don't want to give up on him so I just keep praying about it and I believe that God can change him, I sure can't.

Answer 10

Nonsense, utter nonsense. So the guy likes porn, most do. He wants to wack alone, once again, not unusual. I'd say as long as he still gives you attention, get over it.

It's a safe outlet for the need for variety that all men have. We're wired that way. Women need to stop being so uptight about the porn issue. And it doesn't mean your marriage is in trouble.

My wife and I have great sex, we experiment, we love each other, but I still like to watch porn and give it a tug. There's nothing wrong with that.