we have a 19 month-old son who we both love a lot but i always seem to be the one that takes care of him all the time and when i ask him to do something it takes him ages to do it... when we argue is always about the same things our son, money, the living situation, and how he doesnt like to do anything...plus he always ends up telling me things that i can put here......but i found someone that he knows and that i would like to be with after we end everything and ofcouse he doesnt know of that someone else, my son doesnt spend much time with him so it wouldnt make a difference wheter hes there or not. so what should i do or how should i do it and how long do i have to wait until i can be with my other guy??? please help i can take it anymore!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2007-11-01 09:22:54 · 13 answers · asked by shy 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You want to sleep around huh? What a naughty mommy!
2007-11-01 09:26:06 · answer #1 · answered by One Bad Mama Jama 4 · 0⤊ 3⤋
First of all breath, I've heard of men who do and don't help with kids. That's not an excuse but that is life. You should talk with him. Express to him that some type of compromise needs to come from you both and that it is putting a serious toll on the relationship. Next regardless of how much he does or does not do he is still your son's father and he deserves a little more respect than just running off with someone else. It sounds as if you are burned out one with feeling as if the world is on your shoulders and secondly with just being appreciated and assisted with your husband address that first. Do something for you even if it is just for a little while. Next leave the child with him, the next time he is at home, tell him you are stepping out for a minute and that the baby is he's until you arrive back take small steps leave say for about an hour. That way he has a chance to understand bond and appreciate where you are coming from. Next don't bring another person around your son even if you decide you don't want to work things out children can sense things and are smarter than you realize. You need to wait at least a year before seeing someone else or bringing someone around your child. Give your marriage a chance,you said for better or worse not for better unless he does spend time or help with the baby. Divorce hurts from experience and you don't want to do something like that over miscommunication and hard feelings.
2007-11-01 09:33:07 · answer #2 · answered by K M 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Divorce is very messy. I have been through it and it is painful for all involved. You must be sure that this is what you want. I understand you have problems with him but is your love for him still there? You should try to save the marriage first, maybe try a marriage counselor. If this don.t work then you should be honest with him and tell him you would like to try a trial separation and tell him you may want a divorce in the future. As for being with someone else, you must also be sure this is what you want and I would not jump into something right after a divorce. I would wait at least six months. Do remember, a divorce involving child custody is going to be ugly and no one really wins. I wish you luck.
2007-11-01 09:31:30 · answer #3 · answered by 70RR 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Sweety i think you are going to far. What do you think marriage life is. It is about arguing and loving each other. First if your husband works and you are a stay at home mom you shouldn't be sharing taking care of your son. He should want to do it. You should encourage him to hold saying honey look he misses you and wants to to hug and etc. And you should not have been thinking about another guy cause that makes you want to depart from your husband cause someone else is giving you temporary attention. Think about what you are doing. My three boys is their dad one hour a day and sometimes even less but that doesn't mean they don't and won't need him. Do the right thing and best of luck. the other people telling you lose him please it is so easy to say that, but difficult to do.
2007-11-01 09:31:55 · answer #4 · answered by momof3_angles 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Just tell him he obviously isn't ready to be a husband and a father and that you want a divorce. It sound's like he'll jump at the chance.
As for you, you're not ready for a real relationship either so do yourself a favorite and don't get seriously involved with anyone else until after the divorce is final. You are in lust with the other guy---not in love---and look where you're being in lust with your husband got you.
2007-11-01 09:30:56 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Honey, I was so there many years ago, after the birth of our daughter who is 10 years now!!!
When my daughter was born, I had post partum depression, and my husband did not want to take care of my daughter, or me, so I left him and tried to find a doctor and get on the medication to help me get better!
Then I was finally on the right medication, found the right doctor, and came home to be with my husband, and he still continued to live his own life and not paying attention to me or my daughter.
This went on for so many years, and I finally got up and left him! While he was sleeping! It was hard, very hard, but I finally left!
We later reconciled our marriage, and our vows and now have been married for 15 years now.
2007-11-01 09:35:41 · answer #6 · answered by carriegreen13 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
lol i could tell u to do what my ex wife did to me. She came home one day and said she was pregnant by some other guy but I wouldnt suggest that on even my worst enemy. Be honest with him maybe seek some counseling or something, that would be my suggestion. and if you found someone he knows that will make it alot worse than ever because it will kill alot of birds with one stone. It gets complicated it would kill friendships, tell him how you feel and make him understand how serious it really is good luck to you
2007-11-01 09:29:57 · answer #7 · answered by Falcon163 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
get the paperwork started, move out when he's not home and hand him the papers - so long as your state has no laws against someone separated dating someone else and not being considered Adultry, you can move on whenever you're emotionally ready
2007-11-01 09:31:04 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
U dont have 2 tell him nada.Just pack your bags,take your little angel with u and go!
2007-11-01 10:05:52 · answer #9 · answered by EMMA 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Buy the song
These boots are made for walking
and give it to him.
2007-11-01 09:26:37 · answer #10 · answered by Fuzzybutt 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋