we have 3 or 4 overdraft charges a month and before I was never overdrafted. This angers me but if I say anything to him he gets very defensive and I know longer trust what he says. What should I do??
2007-11-01 07:33:36 · 18 answers · asked by ? 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
At first i was going to say divvy up the bills... decide on who pays what bills... get separate checking accounts...
Now I would advise you reconsider going forward with this guy... financial irresponsibility is the main cause for divorce... this sounds like he's a financial disaster waiting to happen.
and you don't trust him... big issue... the foundation of any relations is built on trust and honesty. go with your gut feelings... they are usually right... don't trust this guy... call it off... save yourself some grief and embarrassment
2007-11-01 07:56:32 · answer #1 · answered by Back W 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Take him off of the account. Are the overdrafts due to the fact that you are both spending without checking with the other party. Example, there is $500 in the acct, you each go spend $500. ( resulting in a neg balance)? Or is he going crazy-nuts with his spending? How was he with his solo acct? First, remove him ( before you ruin your rating) and then if you can, work out a solution to try again. good-luck.
2007-11-01 08:05:53 · answer #2 · answered by undone 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Make a household budget for the two of you, all money for bills to go into the account and then give any "play" money as cash to him.
Explain that you love him and that you understand that he does not always remember to write down his checks but you are wasting money on overdraft fees. Having cash will stop the problem.
Good Luck
2007-11-01 07:42:47 · answer #3 · answered by mn lady 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let the balance dwindle down, open another account in just your name again. Don't make any more deposits into his account and remove your name completely. If he asks you, just explain to him that it is actually better for at least one of you to have great credit. Since he chose not to be the one, you went ahead and got that back on track for you both. You can tell him about all the money you'll be saving the two of you with the lower percentage rate your good credit will allow you to get. Kinda like good cop bad cop. If he gives you any grief, it's a sign (VACANCY OPENING SOON!!).... nah, but good credit is very important - smart of you to see this could be a problem.
2007-11-01 09:11:13 · answer #4 · answered by gmoney 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
on your problem, how about a joint account for most stuff. And an additional advantageous seperate account for both one in all you in which you position a series volume each and each month. then you actually can each and every spend the money as you want, no questions requested. The complicated area will be finding out how a lot to placed into the seperate account each and each month
2016-10-23 05:35:26 · answer #5 · answered by Erika 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you need to take his card away and give him an allowance, does he know that every overdraft is what? $27? $35? i know every bank is different, but that is money that is in the hole that you NEVER get it back and as far as him getting defensive, go online and find out where he spends his money. ask for receipts...you are the responsible one, you either be responsible or get him off the account.
2007-11-01 07:44:36 · answer #6 · answered by loriloriloriloriv 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
this is a completely unfair question. what do you think you should do? your entire credit history and credit rating is at risk here. this would have been a non issue with me at the second overdraft. there would have been no more joint account. period. but you have been hanging on for months now, and your credit rating, and your future, are looking poorer and poorer.
2007-11-01 07:45:25 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ding...Ding...Ding! You said it yourself...."he gets defensive when you bring this issue up to him." HELLO.....RED FLAG....first of all, what is he doing with this money? Does he even tell you? Ya'll are married you should know when, how, where, time, everything about this money coming out of this joint account.
Second, if he gets sooo defensive that you can't bring it up....STOP putting money in....let him pay for ALL the overdrafts fees.
Come on.....lets get smart ladies!!!!
2007-11-01 08:01:00 · answer #8 · answered by yellowb 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
My wife and I have a joint account also but SHE keeps the check book! I use all cash that she gives me or a credit card!
2007-11-01 07:37:58 · answer #9 · answered by me4tennessee 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have a joint account for joint bills that you both pay into, and separate "play money" accounts for things like gas for your cars, meals, books, computer games, etc. That way he can spend "his" money on things he wants, you can spend "your" money on things you want, and the bills are paid by both of you.
2007-11-01 07:42:41 · answer #10 · answered by Nandina (Bunny Slipper Goddess) 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋