I asked him to stop the affair because we have two small children together. he refused left the house and has continued to have an affair with this woman. I have told her husband of the affair and he chooses to look the other way. I have no intentions at this point to work things out with my husband but she is influencing my husband to do things that are not appropriate is there anything I can do.
2007-11-01 06:46:45 · 56 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Get a divorce!
How can you be with a man who does not respect you??
Even though you have children, it does not matter!!
They will much rather see their parents happy and divorced, instead of seeing them together and fighting and having an unstable horrible relationship.
You are teaching your children that cheating, lying, and being disrespectful is okay by staying with your husband!
Do the right thing, not only for your children, but for yourself!!
2007-11-01 06:51:31 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No it would not be wrong of you to ask him why he cheated on you. You deserve that much if you were sure you would receive an honest answer. But the fact that he had another married woman that you were acquainted with in your bed makes things even more painful.So what real answer is there? I think to have the other married man as a friend/support person may not be a bad idea. He'll probably understand you better than anyone at this time. However don't be foolish about the situation. The last thing either of you need right now is drama. After all isn't that the reason why you two got rid of those...people?
2016-04-11 08:54:58 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
In a word, no. Your husband is a grown man and he has the right to do what he wishes and be influenced by whom he chooses. You can file for divorce and petition for sole physical custody with no visitation. But unless you can prove that his actions could potentially cause real harm to the children, you're unlikely to prevent him having visitation.
By the way, I don't know that it was your business to go to the other woman's spouse. I'm not saying that the affair is right, but I don't think it's your place to act as the moral barometer for other people.
2007-11-01 06:52:36 · answer #3 · answered by Justin H 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Shes not influencing him, he chooses to have the affair it sounds like...If he does not want to end the affair, you have no choice but to leave, why would you stay? I understand you have 2 young kids, but you cant live like this...someday they will totally understand why you got divorced if thats what you choose. Besides, would you want to stay and have your kids grow up and find out their dad has been having an affair? What kind of message would that give to your kids? Pack up and leave, and maybe see what the husband of the affair lady is up to.
2007-11-01 06:52:21 · answer #4 · answered by Joe C. 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Although it hurts but it takes 2 to make a relationship work and it takes 2 to destroy it. When you resolve this dilema in your life make sure you don't harm your children by trying to turn them against him. No matter what he is their father. Try to talk to the other woman and your husband and let them know that although it hurts you right now that your children are your main concern and that as adults you need all take their welfare into consideration. Instead of hating him the sooner you forgive him the sooner you'll begin to heal regardless if you get back together or not.
2007-11-01 06:54:03 · answer #5 · answered by Allison from Puerto Rico 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I lived in much the same situation for 27 years. After 27 years he decided to marry his newest fling and we divorced. He divorced her after 3 years and is getting ready to marry number 3. I have the kids and frankly my advice is you might as well let him go. I tried to hang in there for the kids and I still have the kids while he goes on with his life.
Frankly, he has answered you. Now you have to decide what YOU are willing to live with and why. Then start preparing for the rest of your life with your kids. I regret that I did not make the decision sooner because my kids suffered and now at 51 I feel as if I am too old to begin most things.
2007-11-01 06:54:19 · answer #6 · answered by bookworm4jc 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know that if it were my husband, there would probably be something rather hard flying at his head. But, that's just me.
As far as her influencing your husband, I'm sorry, but it is he is a big boy and he has chosen to let her influence him.
I think I would have to divorce him. It's one thing to have a fling and regret it and take action to save your marriage, it's quite another to flaunt the affair.
2007-11-01 06:54:32 · answer #7 · answered by haleigh's mom 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well… you don’t have much of a choice if he won’t stop.
You could sleep with her husband to get them back – a very dumb idea…
Or you could get a good lawyer and throw him out and divorce him.
I would go with the second. Change the locks on the house, get the money out of the checking and savings accounts and file a restraining order on him for fear of retaliation.
2007-11-01 06:56:13 · answer #8 · answered by kib_edward 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Divorce
2007-11-01 06:49:19 · answer #9 · answered by Chris S 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No you can not do anything I think what you should do is go get the divorce papers ready and have him sign them and then take him to court and get every penny youi can for your kids. And don't let him get near you or your kids I assure you he will regret it. I live a knew life you are free now go out and be happylive your life with your kids set goals for yourself and your babys don't hold your self back for nothing in the world.
2007-11-01 06:55:13 · answer #10 · answered by Lost 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋