Recently got out of a great relationship a few weeks ago. Nothing bad contributed to the break-up, no cheating, no abuse, etc, more of me wanting it to go somewhere and him not wanting to commit or "get serious." (both 25) We were both sad but decided we want different things. Now he is with someone else. She has a better body than me and she's younger. We don't live in a small town but we run around in the same circles and somehow, everyone knows everyone and everything gets back to me.
I for one have NOT moved on after three weeks and am still in love. So how do you move on after you know the person you love is with someone else? I have a life, I stay busy, I go out with friends, but everything gets back to me and i KNOW i will bump into them sooner or later. I just feel hurt and used and discarded like I was nothing to him and surprised he has apparently moved on so quickly.
(please no rude answers... I'm sad enough as is)
2007-11-01 06:12:48 · 16 answers · asked by Leah 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
More than likely she is his rebound. But if she isn't...its just one of those things that comes along with a breakup unfortunately. They are never easy. Eventually you will meet someone new also. If he wasn't the one for you, think about how much better its going to feel when you finally meet someone who is? It will feel so much more fulfilling than all of your other relationships. Cheer up..it gets easier...just take it day by day. :)
2007-11-01 06:21:33 · answer #1 · answered by Kitten 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Either he is with her on the "rebound", or he didn't love you the way you still love him. I know it hurts, and I'm soo sorry you are going through this tough time. Only time will heal your heart break. It is a bitter pill to swallow that you loved someone who didn't love you back ( I mean not in same way you loved him!! ) I'm not sure how long you 2 were together, but like I said, if he's found someone that quickly, then, even though it doesn't feel like it right now, breaking up was the best thing for you to do. Supposse you married him and then found out he "was" cheating on you, etc.... You too will find someone else. But allow yourself time to "grieve" the loss of this relationship first, before jumping into another one. I doubt the one he is currently in will last. Good Luck !!
2007-11-01 06:29:32 · answer #2 · answered by casper 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is he trying to make you jealous by seeing this other girl?
If he is so quick to jump up and already start seeing other people... then He probably wasn't into you as much as you thought. :(
its either that, or maybe the opposite. possibly he's really hurt by your breakup and maybe he deals with things differently, and maybe he is dating someone else to just "occupy his time" with. Either way, You will get over the pain. I had to go through this so many times. I cant tell you how many times ive been hurt by men. Cheated on, abused by.. been broken up with for ex girlfriends, etc. And the last time I was heartbroken, I told myself that I would never date another guy again, but I bounced back and found someone else and this is the person I am going to spend the rest of my life with.
Keep your head up and worry about you right now. Do something else to occupy. They say if you exercise and go to the gym, you can burn off steam, and feel much better about yourself and it keeps you busy. If you dont want to do that, then stay focused on yourself, your other friends and everyone else around you that loves you. As soon as you find the right person, you will forget all about this guy.
2007-11-01 06:25:51 · answer #3 · answered by mmcnum1fan 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Bless your heart. This is a terrible situation to be in. I feel your pain. I wish I had some magical remedy for this but I don't. All I can tell you is that it is going to take time to heal from this. There is a funny little saying that goes "the best way to get over one is to get under another..." LOL...I am not saying do that, I just thought it may bring a much needed smile to your face.
Anyway, just try your best to avoid them. Since you guys run in the same social circle let all your mutual friends know that the subject of him and her is off limits. You know, like, out of sight out of mind. The less you have a reason to think about this the better off you are. Honestly try to start casually dating. Nothing serious. Do not cut yourself short either by comparing yourself to "her". Maybe he moved on so quickly to speed up the process of getting over you. It sucks when you do not know what is going on inside his head. I guess all I can tell you is to stay busy busy busy! Occupy your time with fun stuff. Go get a makeover to help yourself feel better and get pampered a little, too. Go blow off some steam at the gym and improve your self esteem at the same time. Go out for lots and lots of girls' nights out. Stay away from any close mutual friends for a little while until your healing process is almost over. Good luck. It will be ok. Time will heal the hurt. I know that sounds so cliche, but it is true. :)
2007-11-01 06:28:29 · answer #4 · answered by whatshername 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You deserve to be sad about this for awhile. Go ahead. Put on jammies and watch "When harry met sally" or something and cry your eyes out.
Then get up off the couch and realize that his moving on is not a reflection on you. His moving on to the next hot girl is really a sign of his inability to be alone. He doesn't want anything serious but he doesn't want "nothing" either.
That's ok. Some people are like that. You're not. Good for you! Enjoy this single time and really get to know yourself and then you move on when you're ready!
2007-11-01 06:19:51 · answer #5 · answered by LB 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
That is the hardest and worst hurt you can ever have, it just makes you feel like it is the end of the world. I don't know if anyone has ever been like me or like I use to be. I would date a person and break it off but if I found out or seen them together with another girl I felt like , " What does he thinks he is doing , he belongs to me" even though I really didn't like him that much . But, I felt like every boy I dated should not date anyone because they dated me, he belongs to me. I know that is stupid but when I was in High School I was that way. I would go so far as calling him and getting back together just long enough for him to not be seeing her and then I would break it off again. I wonder why some feels that way, I know I did but after I started to College I looked back and thought what a dummy I was in High School has anyone else ever felt that way in School.
2007-11-01 06:37:12 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
He's most likely just using her as well, it really has nothing to do with you...that's just the type of person he is, a user. When he's finished with this girl he'll move on to the next then the next and so on and so on. And as far as everything getting back to you, just tell the gossipers you don't want to hear it because you need to move on. Good luck.
2007-11-01 06:29:38 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Esther it is hard to move on and try to grow when you keep looking back. There is nothing harder then watching the one you love, love another. Maybe go on vacation and spend some time away from "home" and move on. Tell your friends you moving on and don't want to hear about his adventures. Her body is not goign to bring her true love in face if she loses that and that is all he saw then he is shallow and will lose it all someday. Its hard but find someone who you can hand your heart to and will cherish it. Good luck
2007-11-01 06:34:49 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't know what you lost until it is gone. You made the decision to move on and he went with the decision. You need to look into yourself and see why you want this man back. He may of not been much of a challenge when you dated him but now that he found someone who you think is physically more attractive then you then you now want him back.
2007-11-01 06:27:53 · answer #9 · answered by luvlisteningtomusic 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
U said no abuse, no cheating, no harshwords. It is very good indeed. Yrs and his likings are different. U cannot load him with yrs. U are still friends.Be couragious to understand this and accept it full heartedly.U will meet someone better than him who will understand yr feelings and yr likings will match. It is better that u resolved without any harm in relationship. Keep yrself busy in yr work.People will come in contact with u and u will find someone matching u.Goodluck.
2007-11-01 06:28:44 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋