My best friend's husband is coming home from his tour in Iraq in 3 weeks. He asked for a home cooked meal, beer, and lots of sex. She wants to do something else, too. They have a 6 month old so they can't just do anything plus they're roommates of their house are coming back from Iraq to at the same time. Does anyone have any suggestions of what she can do? She already bought lingerie and wants to do a candle light dinner but she wants to do something else and I offered to babysit.
2007-11-01 04:22:02 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
He was there for the baby's birth and his first 2 weeks before he had to go back to Iraq, she thinks he will only want to be with their baby and do nothing else but she is determined to do something special and fun
2007-11-01 04:31:18 · update #1
Geez, I am assuming he has never seen his child. Hotel room or Bed and Breakfast. But most want to be at their home.
Just add some flavor to what he has already suggested.
2007-11-01 04:27:07 · answer #1 · answered by Opps 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you and some of her other friends could get together and help out. Chip in and buy them a night or 2 at a hotel (it doesn't even have to be fancy, they likely won't notice!), and someone can babysit. That way there are no worries about the baby or roommates and they can just spend some time reconnecting and relaxing.
We don't have kids, but when my husband came home after a year of deployment, his parents bought us three nights in a hotel and that was WONDERFUL! We were engaged at the time, and that homecoming was better than our wedding.
2007-11-01 04:41:29 · answer #2 · answered by Ahni 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Decorate the outside of the house with signs, balloons, streamers.---even all the way down the block---maybe neighbors would join in.
If he missed a Holiday have something there that resembles anything that he missed out on (X-mas leave a gift, Easter basket of eggs, Halloween a pumpkin and candy and etc.)
Light baked good candles to make the house smell yummy. Buy big fluffy towels and a big comfy robe for after his long hot shower. Do all the things that he asked for but most important-----------Run to him with open arms and a huge smile and let him know how much you have missed him. I am so happy for him to be coming home.
2007-11-01 04:50:02 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get the roomates out of the house for privacy. I'm sure they will understand.
Steak and bear and will do the trick. No fru-fru salads and deserts. A portahouse cut and beer will be perfect. Home made mashed potatoes or mac&cheese is comfort food that he would like to have.
He needs PEACE!. She needs to cool down on the honey-do-lists, and be relaxed about him and not houding him about him "wanting to sleep" or "being tired" etc. He came back from war and needs to re-adapt to society again sorta-speak. She needs NOT to make any plans or elaborate parties, he needs privacy, peace and quiet,
I'm sure that shewould like to go out and do this and that, but all he needs is exactly what he specifically requested: a home cooked meal and private time with his spouse. NOTHING ELSE. So you caring and understanding folks that want to help, please let them be and do not overwhelm the man with calls, visits, parties and plans to go and do/see things.
Tell her also, that she needs to be cool if he doesn;ttake his shoes off or doesn't follow the house rules at the beginning. There have been so many arguments in couples at military bases over silly things like messing the carpet with dirty shoes or eating cookies on the couch. I'm not lying. My friend is a Counsellor in a military base and this is very common.
Good luck.
2007-11-01 04:32:59 · answer #4 · answered by Blunt 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My husband and I have been married for 12 years. He is currently deployed. The best advice would be to babysit for her. That is a great idea. For her, I would tell her to not worry so much as to making it special. He would want to spend time with the baby, but he will only have eyes for her if the baby is at the sitters! The guys really don't want much when they come back. Just a sense of normalcy, and love and support. One night alone for the two of them would be great, nothing major.
Just my opinion!
2007-11-01 04:35:34 · answer #5 · answered by shannos20 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She could do what my wife did when I returned from overseas.
Wear the following to greet him: The lingerie, high heels, an overcoat, and a yellow ribbon in her hair.
Have a six pack of his favorite beer in a cooler in the trunk of the car.
Take "the long way home". Stop somewhere secluded. Make several stops.
I LOVED it!!! Bragged about it for years (still do, as you can see).
2007-11-01 04:30:40 · answer #6 · answered by a_niceguy_in_virginia 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't ovewhelm the guy. All she really has to do is be there for him. Believe me, (I once came back from there also) I wanted all that stuff too, and got it, but keep it low key. Let him dictate what he wants to do. A small gathering with some booze, good food, all that is great. It's great that you offered to babysit, but if he wants his son/daughter with him let the kid stay there with them, they can still have a good time together while the kid is asleep.
Give them all space to be a family.
2007-11-01 04:34:44 · answer #7 · answered by Sean C 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
do exactly what he asked go overboard with it (the fridge fully stocked with his favorite beer, his favorite home cooked meal and a hundred yellow ribbons tied to anything you have out front to tie them to)she should meet and greet with the baby then you can take the baby(he will want to see the baby too) she should already be wearing the new lingerie and a sexy little number over it -and then plan a welcome home party a week later
2007-11-01 04:33:39 · answer #8 · answered by suan b 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She can go out, purchase a nice black number, you can in the meantime offer to babysit, book them a table at a nice restaurant and tell her she needs to book a room in a hotel for them so that they can really get going
2007-11-01 04:25:51 · answer #9 · answered by Scatty 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The party , sex and all are great but he will also need some wind down time.
2007-11-01 04:36:09 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋