Do you find any truth in this sentiment? Or any truth vise versa with males? Not so much physical appearance but complicated personalities is what I am asking about.
I ask this question because both my husband and me are pretty simple in our emotional wants and needs, and I have to imagine that is why we are happy in our relationship. He is mild tempered and I am somewhat of a complicated person, so do we just balance out? Maybe the song should go “if you are a complicated person, don’t make a pretty women you wife…”
Sooo the question I pose is that is we were complicated emotionally would we be less happy? This is a philosophy of sorts that I have come to believe over time.
Thoughts or comments very welcome?
2007-11-01 03:33:14 · 16 answers · asked by kub2 4 in Social Science ➔ Gender Studies
I don’t know how I came across as weak-minded or not respecting myself??? Maybe cause I posted this in GWS? I would like to clarify that I am a strong willed and opinionated women; I was simply pondering my relationship, that all people... geez
2007-11-01 03:56:52 · update #1
Rainbow... I guess a better way of explaining my husband would be also be consistant.
2007-11-01 03:58:54 · update #2
guess I seem a little one dimensional asking this question as I did (with reference to the song). You are all very right, this is not a simple matter of "complicated" mingling with "consistent" personalities, there are a huge amount of factors to take in when pondering ones relationship or lack there of.
I really do appreciate all the great feedback!
2007-11-01 04:12:16 · update #3
I agree, for the most part, with your statement, though not necessarily the initial question.
When two complicated personalities combine, it usually is a recipe for disaster, as most of the time, there is no balance in that kind of relationship, perhaps lots of fireworks, steamy sex and emotional expressions, but no one to balance out the complicated aspects of those type of personalities combined.
But I don't generalise, because even the most complex of couples can make their relationship work, if they choose to.
Personally, I wouldn't involve myself with someone who is too similar to me in personality, it would be boring and part of the excitement in dating, is discovering new things, yet sharing certain commonalities.
Interesting question. :-)
2007-11-01 09:31:10 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
The song refers to the fact that a pretty woman will give a man heartburn because there will always be other men who are attracted to her, which will make him upset because he can never be sure there isn't a better guy she might be looking for. This would never happen with an unattractive woman (supposedly). The truth in that statement is that if the man is insecure enough in the relationship to let things like that get to him, there will always be room for unhappiness. That's not really that complicated.
I'm not sure what you mean by being "emotionally complicated" because we're all complicated to some extent even if some of us don't need as much to be contented. Happiness isn't really an emotion, it's a state of being -- it can be affected by different emotions, and what makes you happy as individuals could be different. Even the way you express certain emotions could be different, and you could both be as complicated but just have different things that set you off (or different amounts of things).
2007-11-01 11:01:07 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
I've discovered this about the whole thing: it's not all about appearance, "complication", education level etc, it's about whether the person is a good person or not. Generally speaking you can tell right off the bat whether the person is good-natured or not. If the guy is an ***hole I don't want anything to do with him. PERIOD. If he's attractive, icing. If he's smart, fantastic! If he's interesting and has lots of interests, wonderful!! But overall, I don't want anything to do with an ***hole. If they open their mouth and ***t comes out, they are an ***hole.
Complication is sometimes just another word for being difficult btw. Difficult people do not WANT to get along with others.
I had one ex who claimed to be "complicated". No, he just had commitment issues and expected me to go along with his version of a "relationship" (i.e. not a relationship at all). He got dumped like 3 day old spaghetti. He's not complicated at all I told him, he's just an ***hole.
2007-11-01 10:57:30 · answer #3 · answered by AH0030 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
That's too much to think about (hahaha) - but I have noticed that my 14 year old stepdaughter likes complications and drama - and is not nearly as happy as I am, or as my wife is. I'm told that the two of them are very similar, but my wife wasn't capable of being happy until age 33 or so, and then only after just about losing her life in a car accident.
The problem is that many times people choose to be more complicated than they have to be, and are somehow either unable or unwilling or both to change to be happy.
Perfect? No. Reasonable? Yes.
2007-11-01 11:37:36 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
This song is about a pretty insecure man, who won't be happy with anyone, because he doesn't think he is good enough for anyone. Men are extremely visual sexually speaking. So, he won't be marrying someone he does not find attractive, because chemistry in any relationship is essential. However, if two uncomplicated people got together, they would die of boredom in a few days spent together. They need us ( complicated and exciting individuals ) to show them how wonderful life could be. Now, if two complicated creatures get together, they will kill each other eventually: damn too much excitement isn't good either. Moderation is the word. In short: we need each other for different reasons, but we still do.
2007-11-01 11:54:03 · answer #5 · answered by ms.sophisticate 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
My boyfriend is consistent, which comes across as uncomplicated, and is for the most part, mild-tempered. I'm the opinionated, high energy one which probably balances us out.
But to answer your question, being complicated just makes one examine one's life more introspectively. The reverse of that would be "ignorance is bliss".
But regarding that song, I think men want pretty women to be their wives. I mean, a guy wouldn't have approached a woman in the first place if he didn't find her attractive at some level, be it physical, intellectual, esoterical, spiritual, or whatever. So if a man told me he liked me because I WASN'T pretty, well, that would be the end of that relationship!
2007-11-01 10:45:27 · answer #6 · answered by Rainbow 6 · 2⤊ 2⤋
Well, first of all, anyone that thinks they need anyone else to be happy, is setting themselves up for failure.
If you need someone to make you happy, chances are you'll fail in any relationship. Learn to be content without someone, and you'll be content with someone.
If you base your happiness on other people, you'll be miserable. Cuz people aren't perfect and they'll let you down in one way or another.
Learn to admit YOUR mistakes, and you'll more readily accept others' shortcomings. Most problems in relationships are caused by selfishness. If both sides would think of the other person, then they'd both be happy.
Your partner doesn't like something? Then stop doing it. You don't like something? Your partner should stop. It's simple, really...it's our self-pleasing attitudes that get in the way.
2007-11-01 10:45:19 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
Uh I got confused cause the question was complicated. I would say if you have love- just be. Existentialism has a place in love. Sometimes questions and answers are a problem
2007-11-01 22:47:56 · answer #8 · answered by Red Phantom 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it is only a song
it is the heart and soul of a person that makes marriage work out. If you are committed to marriage, what matters is the other person, not their looks
a proverb from alaska goes, marry a good cook, kissing don't last, cooking do!
beauty fades, the inner person either shines as beautiful as before or fades as well, and that my friend is tragic
I hope that you both only have eyes for one another and your last a hundred years
2007-11-01 11:23:40 · answer #9 · answered by magnetic_azimuth 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Its just a silly song no one wants to be married to a ugly person good thing we all have different taste
2007-11-01 10:41:56 · answer #10 · answered by chrissy k 1 · 2⤊ 1⤋