Sexless relationship driving me crazy?

Question

i have been seeing this woman for about 3 years and living together for about two. for the first year the sex was great, and frequent. then she took these monthly shots for endometrosis. the doctor said her hormones would be reduced for about 6 to 12 months. and the sex was maybe once a week. well shes been off the shots for about a year now and the sex is even worse. once every three weeks if im lucky. every time i try to talk about it she makes me feel like an asshole saying all i care about is sex. its been making me feel so worthless that i find myself drinking alot bymyself late into the night. we are engaged but im worried about our future.

Answer 1

You should be worried. Try talking this over with her. Better yet. Seek couples counseling. It really sounds like she has some type of problem with sex that needs to be resolved. In the mean time back off and give her a breather. Most women don't like someone begging for sex all the time. It is better to talk with one another in a non-confrontational manner.

Answer 2

I think you have good cause to be concerned, I am not sure how old you are but to only have sexual relations once every three weeks is not my idea of a good life, and they do say the longer you are with some one the less it becomes , that being said I know that couples do and have had sex several times a week for years, and perhaps you should be talking to them, but you are not over sexed but you are defiantly undernourished. and I would ask the girlfriend to go with you to a doctor to see what if any thing can be done, then you will have to make some decisions. A healthy relationship is not biased on sex but sex is a good part of it and if your partner is not able or willing you need to look at this closely

Answer 3

There is no need to be worried about the future, u should learn to love. Love is stronger and can stand spells of lean sex periods. Maybe she love u, and if u also love her, take this time of abstinence as time to rejuvenate and be ready for the sex rich period that may follow. Meanwhile answer yourself if u are willing to have a life of abstinence, a life of sacrifice, because the woman is suffering from a problem. I do not thing u should feel worthless or indulge in drink, u are doing a great job by this sacrifice for your woman. She may also respond and give u sex, even if it hurts her.

Answer 4

Wow, you are engaged and already miserable. The sex life probably won't get any better unless she can get some testosterone testing. They do give that to women in low doses and she may have to go through a couple of doctors to get one to prescribe her the right thing. If that can't happen then it won't get better. I have been married for 14 years and the frequency of sex doesn't usually increase much but goes in spurts (no pun intended). If you want sex don't tell her that is your main objective. Say stuff like I just want to hold you and touch you and you are so beautiful and I love your eyes. Make her feel cherished, she will probably fall for it. Hope this helps! :0)

Answer 5

She makes you feel like an ******? Well the relationship has changed, does she realize it's for the worst? Let her know your not comfortable, to the point where you don't like yourself and she needs to help. Otherwise your just BSing your way through an engagement and an even rougher marriage. Find a better way of dealing with your probs or suffer the consequinses.

Answer 6

You say you are worried about your future with this woman, so I am assuming you would like some advice on if a future together should happen or not. Well, let's examine your situation. You are with woman who doesn't want have sex with you anymore. In addition, when you confront her about it, she blames it on you being "sex crazed".
You don't have a future in my opinion. Why would you want a future with someone who doesn't even want to sleep with you anymore? Do you really think it can get better?

Answer 7

with good reason. Is this going to get better if you're married? Nope.
The clincher is that she won't talk rationally about it. It's not her health problems or the meds, or even the lack of sex, if there was a good reason, and you had talked it over with her, there was a soloution , and there was going to soon be a time when sex would be on the menu again. that would be liveable.
But to give you a guilt trip, and not face it, isn't a good sign for your future with her.

Answer 8

It probably is getting old for her try new things romantically u know we women like that,but u know after 3 years it slows down y dont u talk to her about it,u dont think maybe she's getting it from somebody else, sometimes it changes too if u have kids i dont know if youll have kids that might be the reason y shes acting different.

Answer 9

This is really not the right place to be asking a question like that,unless you get very lucky and find a doctor on here that can help you.Look guy you were smart enough to get on here.be Smart enough to get a doctor's help.I'm not saying this to be mean .there are so many places out there that will help you.Churches,government offices,marriage councilors,all on the Internet.Chose your church,www.marriage councilors.com if they ask for money and you can't afford ask them about gov.agencies.Our insurance company helped us.

Answer 10

If you can't talk to her then you've got to decide for yourself is it really worth hanging in there? She may never come out of it like she was before and then your stuck in eternal misery.
Personally if I've been reasonable and understanding and supportive in a relationship and I'm not getting back anything for my effort, I move on.
There's too many woman out there who are willing to go the extra mile if you are too, rather than to stay trapped in an essentially loveless relationship.