I have my new husband, whom I have been for a cuple of years by now... the problem or I dont know if it is... is this...
I had find out that everitng bad that it had happend to him it was because he was getting divorce, wich it means hes hole life have gotten really bad.. credit, life .. bankcrupcy... drugs.. rehab..suspentions... and arrests...so I think that he whent trough that becuase he could not take the pain of loosing his ex, I' I wrong? becuase now everithimme we fight I always bring that up!! and technically I'm afraid that if she trys to get her familly back toguether he will just leave everithing in here with me, help!!
2007-10-31 12:35:16 · 8 answers · asked by carolinae09 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You probably should have figured all this out before the marriage. However, you are in it now. Just let it play out, it may surprise you and work out if he is willing to be dedicated to your marriage.
2007-10-31 12:42:30 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Carolina: It seems to me that he blames it all on someone else and he will do the same after you are gone. I see divorced people with distrust since they have already failed once, specially when they complain about everything and pretend to have been victimized. I would open an account somewhere he doesn't know and start saving. I would also forgo pregnancy for a while until he fezzes up to his past responsibilities and acts like a man. He sounds immature, but there is help. Perhaps he could benefit from some male therapy or an older friend who could help him take control of his personal chaos.
Either way, you need to ready yourself for the worse because his past issues have not been resolved. I wish you the best and I hope that you keep a good attitude. LIFE IS TO BE LIVED INTENTIONALLY.
Cheers,
Mr. M. on "help."
2007-10-31 19:48:19 · answer #2 · answered by Humberto M 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
learn the hard way, you should never get into a relationship that you have not check out the details of the reason why, both sides divorced,So the question is, does he want her back? She can want her family back all she wants, do you want to give the family back? Also stop fighting about the ex, before you become an ex, or is that what you want? HELP
2007-10-31 19:55:14 · answer #3 · answered by yp_marie_poughkeepsie 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you serious?
Your message needs help. I had to read it twice.
You should not throw things in your husband's face that he shared with you in confidence. Divorce is a big deal for a lot of people and if he went through a ruff patch... you need to help him let that go and get over it.. instead of dwelling on it and reminding him of the things he probably is not most proud of.
Please don't be insecure about the ex-wife either. If he married you than it must mean something.
i would be curious how old you are....
2007-10-31 19:43:48 · answer #4 · answered by Miss Kelly 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you have to realize that he is with you now because he chose to be and you have to make your life together good enough that he won't want to go back to her. If you fight often, try to get counseling to get over that and then just talk to each other. You may even just be a rebound from that marriage but that doesn't mean that you can't make it work very well if you work together. If he is happier with you he will stay there but you can't keep bringing up the past and have to concentrate on your future together. Good Luck to you!!
2007-10-31 19:55:50 · answer #5 · answered by Al B 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well you should have figured that out before marrying him so its pretty much your fault for not learning that. but if he has all this baggage then id say help him out and be there for him, instead of using your time to be a coward and being paranoid you can try and pull him out before his wife decides you. if you do help him chances are greater he will stay with you.
2007-10-31 19:46:07 · answer #6 · answered by djmixah7 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
And you had no idea about him or his life before you married him? I find this tough to swallow. He's yours to deal with now regardless so figure out if you stay or leave. Doesn't sound promising though.
2007-10-31 19:49:14 · answer #7 · answered by dawnb 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Boy, if this is how you really feel, you should not have married this man.
2007-10-31 19:54:04 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋