evening folks,if your boyfriend went out on a night out with friends and ended up at lap dancing club.then paid for a dancer to dance for HIM.would you have a problem with it?
2007-10-31 08:41:31 · 42 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
He can get one if I can give one.
2007-10-31 09:09:42 · answer #1 · answered by buffytou 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Are you asking permission to be mad with him? I think it depends on the relationship you are in and what you view as appropriate behavior and what you see as a violation of your intimate relationship. I would think a lot of women would take exception to it, however, I know quite a few that do not because 1) they know how far their boyfriends would actually go with a stripper and the lap dance is the apex of that and 2) they have great divorce lawyer friends.
If you aren't happy about it, express that to him. If you don't, and just pout a lot, you can expect it to happen again. He could have always passed.
2007-10-31 08:50:05 · answer #2 · answered by The Thought of TBW 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
On a very instinctive level I'd have a problem with it but when you start to look at it logically I'd have to admit that it's not a big deal.
For a start, unless your bf is Johnny Depp, I don't reckon that the lap dancer would have the slightest bit of interest in him (just the contents of his wallet!)
If he's with his mates, then it's a very bloke-y thing to do, and he was probably just going with the flow.
Even if he'd paid for her to dance for him because he fancied her, it's you he came home to. (And who can put their hand on their heart and say they've never found someone other than their partner attractive. Not me, for sure!)
Is going to a lap dancing club really any different to going to a normal club - pretty girls dancing around in skimpy clothes?
Like I said, I certainly wouldn't like it, but I don't feel that it would be a deal-breaker. I'd get over it pretty quickly.
2007-10-31 09:01:42 · answer #3 · answered by Fifi L'amour 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Dear Ashley,
Yes and No. Yes because almost every female has this insecurity of her man having another female dancing for him, and sitting on his lap. No because I have to be a little understanding, especially if he has gone with his friends. It is very difficult for males, to be different than their friends. If he is not doing what they all are doing, chances are he is going to be the laughing stock of that group. They will make fun of him and keep saying he is so ***** whipped that he is scared to do anything. So as long as you trust your boyfriend, find out his reasons for doing it, and respect his reason if that reason is his friends. If it is something he likes, and was curious as to what it would be like, than for future turn on's you know what to do. Sometimes that is the side that helps the relationship remain spicy. Let me know how it works out. Good luck to you.
2007-10-31 08:51:51 · answer #4 · answered by Simbha 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Really a partner should be there for you when you are having a difficult time. That is what relationships are all about. Its understanding he is hesitant becaus he may feel that if you through another patch then you may push him away again. Read here https://tr.im/yJuWL
I am going through something similar, but she hasnt made any contact to come back to me, and I know even though I may want her, I would be hesitant because of the possibility of going through the same thing again.
I dont know how long you have been apart, but dont pester him to get back with you, although it would be good for you to let him know your feelings, and that you are sorry for pushing him aside.
If he is willing to chat, then great, if he is reluctant, just offer to be a friend maybe, but you have to know that it does not mean he will come back to you.
He will care about you, even after what iv gone through...feelings dont just dissapear no matter what he may say. Stick in there. only time will tell.
If you get another chance, then make the most of it and never let him go awain because if you do, he will never come back. I really hope it works out for you. Its a difficult thing to go through.
2016-07-19 20:59:22 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If the friends paid for the lap dance it doesn't really bother me. It falls under the category of "boys will be boys". You can't really control how the guys spend their money. If my boyfriend paid for the lap dance then he is now my EX boyfriend.
2007-10-31 08:46:54 · answer #6 · answered by barb 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Here's a male perspective: My wife went to a male strip club in Canada for her bachelorette party (I just had the guys over to my place to play cards, pool, darts, etc. -- no stripper), and she has gone back a time or two with her friend who lives in France when she comes to town (AFTER we got married), and I don't have a problem with it because she comes home to me. Of course, I would expect the same consideration from her if I went to a strip club with the guys, but I don't intend to do that unless my best friend gets engaged...
2007-10-31 08:46:23 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋
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Once you do that then you can start to worry about getting back together with your ex, other wise you will find that you are fighting about all the same things and getting no where. Do what it takes and I promise things will work out in your favor.
The funny thing is I came to the realization that I had to change a little too late. After I was kicked out and after I was about to lose the only things that truly mattered to me - her love. A funny thing happens when we truly love someone and lose them. We do what ever it takes to get them back. For me I had to drop bad habits that had caused not only our relationship to sour but practically every other relationship I had had in the past. Not only with women, but with friends, co-workers, family, you name it.
Which is why I say to you as my ex at the time said to me, the only thing you can do is change yourself. Work on yourself and improve on the person that you already are. Drop the negative things in your life that don't belong there and you will see all of your relationships start to take off to new heights.
2016-04-24 14:34:46 · answer #8 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No - as long as he told me about it, in detail!!!
I trust my fella with my life & I know a dance would be all it is. I might on the other hand ask him to cross my palm with the same amount so I could go out & have some fun....
I meant shopping!
2007-10-31 10:26:42 · answer #9 · answered by Mindless 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As long as his pants stay up & zipped I would have no problems with my man getting a lap dance.
I like strippers too.
But when you are in a relationship you should respect the relationship enough to have fun without disrespecting your partner.
2007-10-31 09:38:33 · answer #10 · answered by thistlesnshamrocks 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wouldnt mind if my hubby did it. For a start if he'd been out drinking with all his mates they will have gone for a laugh, for a second the majority of thease clubs have VERY strict look but dont touch rules.
If he goes out again I would meet up with him and go to the club with him!! you never know you might like it!
2007-10-31 08:55:28 · answer #11 · answered by gert 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋