i have been separated for almost 5 months he has been talking to girl friends and he left the house b/c i put him in jail for domestic violence now he said his coming back before christmas he has done alot of thing in the middle of does 5 month he treated me like **** he diconnected the light and the water and my cell phone has help me with extra money if i need it b/c of the divorce he has to pay the rent and give me 250 a month do you think he still loves me after all that can he forgive me? was it my fault were separated? i need help to think clear?
2007-10-31 08:29:38 · 21 answers · asked by wndyroman 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
now we can just do what he says and he won't take my opinion well i finish my college and i am doing my externship (free hours of work) he calls me but but i am the one looking for him more and he said i have to suffer alittle b/c what i did to him this 5 month i have cheated on him or been with other guys
2007-10-31 08:41:57 · update #1
I hope you're kidding. You listed everything that he did and he sounds like a real ***hole. Move on and don't look back.
2007-10-31 08:34:20 · answer #1 · answered by Don 7 · 3⤊ 1⤋
You say that you have put him in jail for domestic abuse, he cut off your light and water,he has contacted other women...I think you know the answer.
We (women) tend to rationalize so that everything sounds reasonable. Why would you want a man that is capable of doing all the those things to you. There are MANY men out there that know how to take care and treat a woman.
I think you should take a step back and maybe write down all the things he's done - clear your head. Take advantage of the fact that he's gone and think, go out, pretend for a while that you have offically broken it off.
You will find the answer. Money,settlements,cellphones,rent, those are all excuses. That stuff has nothing to do with love. I think you know you have to leave him or that he's already left you. You only live once, why torture yourself? Discover yourself and live life happy.
2007-10-31 15:53:39 · answer #2 · answered by cayeyana_pura 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO! Listen to me. I have seen this time and time again. He went off, had fun with other women, and now he sees you slipping away from him. He will take you back and USE YOU for a few weeks, then have another change of heart and leave you again. If you had to have him put in jail for domestic violence, then you know you're with a master manipulator. Stop letting your loneliness and fear of being single draw you back to this man who plays around, disrespects you and scares you to the point you have to call the police. Read "Why Does He Do That" by Lundy Bancroft. You are not alone!!! You are not alone. You will be destroyed if you take this man back. You are not alone, honey. Hear me.
2007-10-31 15:39:56 · answer #3 · answered by Kitten Hood 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You need to think clear....
From a survivor of abusive relationships ... do not get back in it if you have gotten out of it. Why do you want him back? I mean if he has abused you before then he most likely will do it again. I do not believe that he has forgiven you, I think that would be hard to do. But either way think about how it was and why you put him in jail. Has he done anything to improve on himself since the two of you have been separated? Like anger management ?
2007-10-31 15:37:32 · answer #4 · answered by ~Crystal~ 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
A man that you have to have arrested for domestic violence is not one that you want to take back.You need to pay? Those are not good words to hear from him. If you stay with him you will probably pay over and over again. I would get out of this marriage. You are already separated and he is already out of your house. I would not let him back. Tammy said it perfectly.
2007-10-31 16:21:00 · answer #5 · answered by kim h 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you not see how he turned everything around and is now trying to make you feel responsible for what he has done? Now it seems he is blaming you for having an appropriate reaction to his behavior. He is a typical abuser. It is text book. Are you really going to fall for his crap and subject yourself to more? Are you that desprate to be with him? Because he is counting on it. Especially now, you are already away from him. Don't regress. Keep moving forward and be strong. Show him you are not as weak as he thinks and hopes you are. Get ANGRY
2007-10-31 15:57:01 · answer #6 · answered by tammy 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You're asking this question when you had to put the stupid a$$hole in jail for domestic violence?!?!
No!! Leave him find a real man who doesn't feel the need to beat his woman to prove he's a man!!
2007-10-31 15:36:32 · answer #7 · answered by Jenn 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Let him go.. Its easier said then done, but think about it why do you want someone like that? Why would you call the cops on him if you knew you wanted him back?..If i were you i would start things fresh and move on with my life. I know i wouldn't be able to take my husband back knowing his been with other girls, or even hit me. Think about your future...GOOD LUCK
2007-10-31 15:40:23 · answer #8 · answered by love 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's a jerk. What is it about him that makes you WANT to be with him? He'll do it again, and again. B/c he CAN! Get rid of him now before it gets worse! A man like that loves nobody BUT himself!!!!! You deserve better and will find someone who will treat you SOOOOOO much better! Be careful!
2007-10-31 16:28:23 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to get some serious counseling and fix your screwed up head before you attempt to fix anything else if your life.
Good luck. Try shelters for abused and battered women for the counseling you NEED.
Good luck.
2007-10-31 15:36:16 · answer #10 · answered by box of rain 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Violence is a deal breaker
Lisa
2007-10-31 15:40:56 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋