I have a boyfriend who is protective, and I don't know if it is because he loves me or because he wants to be controlive; or what it is. I need answers form guys and girls. Please HELP!!!
2007-10-31 07:42:12 · 23 answers · asked by Sarah Brown 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
We dont want anything to happen...........just like u dont.
2007-10-31 07:45:07 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
This could be down to a number of reasons.
1. Something that happened in his past, either to him, someone he was with or even a family member.
2. He is taking the whole being a hunter/gatherer thing too far.
3. He just wants to be sure that you are safe so that it maximises the time you will be together in preventing any harm coming to you.
4. He is secretly a super hero.
Try asking him or talking in a way that the subject is "naturally" bought up. I can be protective, buts it's because I care, and I know how fast the world is becoming a place where personal safety is such a concern. I hope that this is the case here and it's not for the control reason.
Good luck! Hope this helps.
2007-10-31 07:49:35 · answer #2 · answered by tcstevo78 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You use the word "protective" but you do not offer a definition of the word or examples.
"Possessive"?
"Obsessed"?
"Worry-wart"?
"Controlling"?
"Jealous"?
"Unrealistic"?
"Not considering your feelings or needs"?
"Threatening"?
"Abusive"?
"Tyrannical"?
"Unrealistic expectations"?
"Closed off to you having your own friends"?
"Using the Bible [or religion] wrongly / misquoting verses for control"?
"Lacking self-confidence"?
"Clinging to you for all emotional and social needs"?
If you have 2nd thoughts about this guy, then chances are, you have picked up on something that he has or lacks in character. Best you two have a "time out" and sort things out. If he reacts badly to the suggestion, then that is a good indicator that something is wrong emotionally with him, and he can become potentially dangerous.
Best sit down with one or both of your parents and get their perspective. They have a special "protective" love of you that is healthy, and life experience will tell them if something is wrong with this guy and what to do about him.
103107 1:53
2007-10-31 07:54:13 · answer #3 · answered by YRofTexas 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
We are all insecure to some degree. We are jealous, and protective. When it gets to the point where you have to ask this question. Watch out, get your friends and family's opinio, AND TAKE IT! Alot of women get the opinion, then sit down with the guy, tell them what others said, and then stay with him. He then begins to try to limit the time you spend with those people. If you have a mother , and she knows him ASK HER! She will tell you the truth.
2007-10-31 08:02:42 · answer #4 · answered by lotsandlots 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There's a difference between protective and controlling. Protective wants to keep you safe from harm, but respects your decisions may go against that - Controlling wants to keep you doing whatever HE thinks is best, without consulting your wishes.
Talk about it honestly and openly with him, and be clear about what sort of behavior you'd prefer.
2007-10-31 07:48:01 · answer #5 · answered by teresathegreat 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Too protective in what way? Like do you need to ask permission for every thing you do or he flips. if so...RUN. It wont get any better. Of course it might be hard but talk to him and let him know theres no need to be over protective. If he insists then thats a flag to try to get out.
2007-10-31 07:46:19 · answer #6 · answered by Curious Person 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Protective or controlling partners are to be avoided. They only get worse if allowed to behave in this way. They dont love you of they have to control you. Love is about being relaxed and free. Dont allow yourself to be treated in this way.
2007-10-31 07:47:24 · answer #7 · answered by twinkletoes 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If he constantly interrogates you about your whereabouts, even for as little as a 5 minute gap, he needs professional help. Nothing you can do or say will satisfy him and it may be time to end the relationship.
This happened to someone I know and it got worse before she finally left him.
2007-10-31 07:51:00 · answer #8 · answered by germaine_87313 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like he is controlling and jealous. Being protective is asking you to wear your seat belt or locking the door when he leaves you at home.
2007-10-31 07:44:46 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
you need to elaborate a bit more on how he is being protective in order to get the answer you want. What exactly does he do?
2007-10-31 07:44:48 · answer #10 · answered by Jake S 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Controlling boyfriends and husbands are usually insecure and are afraid of losing you.
I'd find another boyfriend if I were you.
2007-10-31 07:47:28 · answer #11 · answered by Sean 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋