Stalking sounds really harsh but its the only word i can think of. I asked a few questions about this before but i'll just tell you the story again. I met this guy on a course and he seemed alright. I'm a sociable type of person so i went out to the club with him and that type of stuff. I just want to stress i'm 100% straight. As time went on he started to text me everyday and phone me every few days. Now he texts around 3 or 4 times a day on seperate occasions and phones most days. I try to be nice but he's really starting to freak me out. He doesnt know my address but when he hinted for it and i didnt respond he said "ill go into the course, print off your CV and get your address" with a laugh in his voice. He also always says things like "oh you love my voice dont you" when hes on the phone. He even said we should live together and other things. Theres a lot that doesnt make sense. He said he was beat up but had no marks on him. He was talking to me at midnight one night...
2007-10-31 05:51:06 · 36 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
then the next day he said he was out at fantasia even though he was in his house. He's becoming very very strange. I never thought anyone could be like this, he seemed totally normal. I dont text him or phone him at all but he always does with me. I feel i cant get rid of him, hes suffocating me. This morning i left my phone up stairs and at 11am he text me and by 1pm i had 5 missed calls. I've had it, im finished. That isnt normal i dont think. I feel bad but i never led him on or anything. He wanted to go out 2night but im going to text and say i have no money. The more i dont go places with him the more he seems to become cheeky and almost aggressive with me. Whats your advice?
2007-10-31 05:54:44 · update #1
Im definatly not sending mixed messages, i rarely reply to his texts now and when i do i reply and say i have no credit, thinking he wont text. When he phones, i know he'll keep doing it so i answer it and cut the conversation short. Iam 100% not leading him on.
2007-10-31 06:09:40 · update #2
Yeah, it sounds like he may be gay (either knows it or is in denial) and is obsessed with you. You need to sever the relationship. When you do, I can almost guaranty it will get ugly, so be prepared. You may eventually need to get a restraining order. But for now, just calmly tell him that he's smothering you.
Btw, he isn't going to get the hint. You need to let him know that he is the problem. Otherwise, when you say you're broke, he will offer to spot you. He needs to know that he's smothering you, otherwise it won't stop.
2007-10-31 05:55:21 · answer #1 · answered by largegrasseatingmonster 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well you never said what he was saying in the texts but if your feelings are not the same as his just let him know that you had fun when you went out but you don't feel the same about him as he does you. And ask him not to text or call you any more. If he does persist then GO TO POLICE and make a statement and that way you will have something on record about his calls and texts and that you have asked him to quit. In event that he persists then the cops will arrest him . For evidence dont erase your texts. Hope this helps.
2007-10-31 05:59:40 · answer #2 · answered by Sharon L 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm saddened to hear this happening to you, it is a sacrey thing to go through.
I'd try to screen my calls, or not txt him back , Talk to someone outside the situation and your family. have them watch out to see what this guy does away from you , if they know he is at.
Don't go out alone, always go with someone else. But be aware of what is around you at all times.
Is there a way to change your # if you have an email that he knows then change to a new one for now. and tell only the most important people what it is.
if you have to for a while use different pc's to be sure he cant track your ip , as there are ways to do that.
I put some links to sites here to help you find ways and ideas of what can be done or prevented and help you learn things.
2007-10-31 06:03:05 · answer #3 · answered by poetbjc64 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to be firm. When he calls or texts, answer and say Dude, you know I'm straight. Also tell him you have school, work, the wife, whatever, that has you super busy and you really don't have any time to hang. Cut the conversation off short - just say, I gotta go and hang up. Consider changing your phone # or blocking his. If you talk to him & he says stuff like you should live together say man are you f'ing crazy? I'm not living with you. I barely know you.
Get what you're going to say down in your head & be ready when and if he contacts you again after you've blocked his number.
2007-10-31 05:56:56 · answer #4 · answered by suzanne g 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you may need to start acting "not so nice" -- he's not getting the hint. Do you think he's gay or just friendless? Sounds a bit strange -- like maybe some mental disorder. Do you know anyone else who knows this guy?? See if you can get some input from other people. We have a female version of what you're going through here but she has trouble meeting friends and so she's overbearing and kind of creepy about it.
2007-10-31 05:56:23 · answer #5 · answered by butterfliesRfree 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This guy sounds dangerous. Consider getting a protective order. Are you sending out mixed messages? Are you talking and texting back? There are a million ways to let someone know you're not interested. Tell him you're busy and have to cut back on seeing friends and then stop taking his calls. It sounds like you're trying to be polite but he's not getting the hint.
Be clear with him and cut all contact with him. Good luck.
2007-10-31 05:57:43 · answer #6 · answered by CGordo 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oooh he sounds real gay. Why would a guy want to call another guy at midnight, and with all those hints unless he was interested. And why would you want to receive phone calls like that from a guy and listen to that kind of conversation. Either be straight with him let him know that you are not interested or just totally ignore him. If he persists then call the cops.
2007-10-31 05:54:56 · answer #7 · answered by delicious 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you need to be honest with this guy, but don't be too harsh. Try and make yourself unavailable. Don't respond to pointless texts/voicemails. And alert your family that you've got a creepy guy following you around... just in case you go missing, they'll know the first place to look or alert the police. I'm not saying it would ever get that bad, but I have a weird guy in my apartment complex that comes up to my apartment when he's drunk. At this point the police can't do anything about it, but I definitely told my parents who to suspect if anything happened.
2007-10-31 05:57:10 · answer #8 · answered by Brittany L 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's just a very needy person. Perhaps he mistook your going to the club with him as a lifelong friendship. There people like that out there. Just don't take his calls or answer his texts for a while. Be "too busy" to meet up with him. He'll either get the idea and move on, or fill your place with someone else.
2007-10-31 05:55:00 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
just don't answer any more texts or calls from him and if you have to say it, tell him you're not comfortable being more than a golfing buddy or something and if he continues bothering you or comes to your house - get a restraining order against him. Some people are dense and won't give up or take a hint until you "whack them in the face with a shovel"
2007-10-31 05:57:12 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋