Grateful for thoughts, comments, ideas and criticism of this short piece I have written about friendship, bereavement and hope. I wrote it recently and it deals with what happened when my best friend died of Aids in 1992.
Here is the direct link to my short piece:
http://meanderingtrevor.blogspot.com/2006/08/in-his-waking-life-he-felt-steve-hadnt.html
2007-10-29 16:14:30 · 3 answers · asked by Anonymous in Arts & Humanities ➔ Books & Authors
It feels like a summary instead of a story. Show, don't tell. Instead of giving us all the information, start small, and show us what happened to Steve through his friend's thoughts and actions. I understand that it wasn't meant to be as detailed as say, a novel, but its still a story and should be told like one. Add detail. I don't feel very connected to Steve's friend, either. he lacks character development. You have an excellent writing style though. It definately flows well. Theres a lot of potential here.
2007-10-29 18:04:24 · answer #1 · answered by amor fati 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Excellent.
2007-10-29 17:33:05 · answer #2 · answered by agphotographics 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its good. There is no better therapy than writing from the heart.
2007-10-29 16:24:45 · answer #3 · answered by Ralph 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋