My husband and I are working very hard to get out of debt. We only have school loans and a home loan. We pay off our credit card every month and pay extra towards the college loans. I would like to try for a baby. I have recently been diagnosed with an issue that may mean I am infertile. So I would like to try now just to try naturally first.
My husband is thinking about it and he wants kids, but I think he is afraid of not having all of our financial ducks in a row, while I am afraid that waiting may mean no baby. So what should we do? I am just asking for your opinion I will definatley talk more indepth to my husband. Thanks so much
2007-10-29 15:51:50 · 15 answers · asked by Amanda G 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
This comes down to a priority question for you and your husband.
Are things more important than people.
You will NEVER be financially ready for children, there will always be more debt, newer cars, newer house, newer carpet, extravagent dinners.
Is your personality one which will regret not having those material things? or is it more of one that will always feel your denied if you dont try and can not get pregnant later?
We had literally NOTHING except bills when we accidently got pregnant. WE both had college loans, we only owned one car, we had just purchased our home (with HUGE payments) .
27 years later we have three wonderful children, an estate worth well over what we ever expected, and a really crappy credit record due to medical costs our insurance refused to pay and we never expected. However, we are still well afloat as we pay down our HUGE bill and realize that the best layed financial plans may not always work how we desire.
That said, if a baby comes into the picture now, you will figure out how to make it work. YOu both sound resourceful and conciencous. Life is all about decisions, and this one can go either way. You just need to know what you risk loosing and what you risk gaining and then weighing the two.
2007-10-29 16:04:34 · answer #1 · answered by whoknowsanymore 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I know u probly dont want to hear this and alot of people will dis agree. Baby's arent expensive, IF everything goes on just fine. But with my experience in life, if you plan for the worse than nothing bad will ever happen for you.
You have debt like most americans, if you foresee yourself paying off the debts soon then thats a good thing. But preparing for the future is 100% to a happy and healthy child, college funds, emergency money, cloth money. If you do your bills and dont have an extra 500 or so at the end of it all per month i would realy think about waiting.
A bird cant have an egg without the proper nest, if there are holes in the nest, then the egg will fall through. have a baby only if your nest is built, if you feel it is then do it.
2007-10-29 15:59:43 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Finances always show up when the baby does. It sounds like the 2 of you have most of your major finances and life. If you want to try getting pregnant and infertility could be an issue, I'd hope on that train right now...in case you need to do any further testing or begin any of the hormones etc. Good luck to you both. It's always nice to see some people have their acts together.
2007-10-29 16:12:12 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It would help to have loans paid off. The cost of all the doctor appts alone is scary even with the best insurance. Kids cost a fortune but no matter what it usually works out in the end. I say go for it. Cut back on some of your other luxuries. Like eating out or shopping binges etc. It adds up somewhere.
2007-10-29 15:59:27 · answer #4 · answered by natasha 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, let's put it this way. 1. Are you ready, financially or not? 2. If you have something that's making you infertile, if you don't have one now, but try later on, it's going to cost more for fertility treatments. 3. Babies cost money, a lot of it.
I don't know. When I was married and we had a baby, we weren't rich, but we managed and he was completely taken care of. I think you two should just go over all the pros and cons and you two have to be on the same page about wanting a kid at all.
2007-10-29 15:59:08 · answer #5 · answered by CC 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that this is a difficult issue. If it was me I would Try for the baby now, because if you are unable to get pregnant on your own and have to turn to a Doctor for help getting pregnant that might put you further in the whole than you are right now.
I have a cousin that had to turn to western medicine to get pregnant took her 10 years and $100's of thousands of dollar.
2007-10-29 16:01:40 · answer #6 · answered by racheldeos 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I remember having this conversation with my husband. We decided to wait until we could "afford" to have a baby. Then one day we realized that if we waiting until everything was perfect, it would never happen.
We decided that we would deal with life as it came and our priority was to have a baby. So we did. We have two now and it is fantastic. If you both really want a child, don't put it off.
I have a friend who saved and saved her whole life for her retirement. Never went on a trip, never went out for dinner. Was going to "do it all" once she retired. But, she ended up getting sick and is now bedridden. Rich, but bedridden. What I am trying to say is that no one really knows what tomorrow holds. Enjoy today. Do what makes you really happy.
No one is ever completely financially set for anything.
If you are getting rid of your old debt and are being smart with your money, relax and go for it!
2007-10-29 16:00:59 · answer #7 · answered by tak 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Well, alot of different factors play into this. Your age being one of them. We all know us girls don't have endless time to have babies, so if you are over 30, I would probably start trying. Sometimes it can take a couple of years. If you have to go through fertility treatments, it can get very costly. Discuss your options with a good specialist to help you decide which way to go. Good luck!
2007-10-29 15:59:31 · answer #8 · answered by andmic510 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No question about it try for a baby now there is nothing better then having your own baby. Nothing wrong with adopting a baby but i would definitely try to get preg first if i were you.
2007-10-29 16:10:21 · answer #9 · answered by Teenie 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I have two children love them and want the world for them....money will never be enough....sorry just love a baby
2007-10-29 16:12:59 · answer #10 · answered by just duky 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋