Is it alright to MARRY a man who is 22 years OLDER than me?

Question

I am a 20 year old lady.

Age is only a number, after all.

Age does NOT matter...unless you are a cheese or wine.

Answer 1

thats a good plan if you ask me you will be around 50 and be widowed and have the opportunity for a 2nd life. (not a bad thing), some things are a blessing in disguise and a life full of memories with someone you loved. your smart a 40s something guy is settled down and probably a good thing with his life experiences of all kinds.

Answer 2

It's alright, if you're happy and it's really what you want, but be sure you have considered what that really means. Physically, there is going to be a huge difference that will only become more so as your husband ages. My husband and I are the same age, and sometimes I'll kid him that I need to find a younger man because he's usually too tired to do a lot of the stuff that I want to do and that we used to do when we were younger.

Another friend of mine married a man 16 years her senior, and she commented several times that she's tired of always hanging out with old people because they mostly socialize with his friends and associates.

Are you considering having children? Have you considered all the pros and cons?

Answer 3

when I was 23 I met this great guy who was 44. We hit it off instantly. We'd go dancing, and watch movies, and out to dinner. And I hate to say it, but that's where it started to go bad. Dinner. My son was 18 months old, and other than at the club I'd pretty much keep him with me. We went out for pizza one night all 3 of us, and that darn teenybopper waitress said, "We'll just put the plates in front of Grandpa!" I wanted to die, and take her with me! I quickly told her, in my most dignified tone, that he was not my father, but rather my date! I was red, he was red, and my boy was playing with his keys. He broke up with me shortly there after.

Fast forward to 2005, I'd moved away in 2000, and moved back in 2003, one night out on the town, there he was! We've been together ever since. I'm 33, he's 54. We get along great. Now he tells me that back then, I was too immature, and the "grandpa" thing was the straw that broke the camels back. We are happily married and life is great, and if you ask me, he's the one that's finally matured!

As to is it alright, to each their own, just be aware that there will be differences between the 2 of you, and be prepared for the looks you'll get. He'll mostly get pats on the back, but many will frown on you, and wonder just what kind of golddigger you are. I laugh when I catch people giving me that look, because we know the truth, but you need to be sure you are strong enough to handle it.

Answer 4

See. The age difference is very broad. It would be different if he were 27 or something like that. I would suggest that you not marry him because he is too old for you and I think that you are selling yourself short by marrying a man that much older than you. Older men tend to be jealous and/or get more jealous as they get older. Things that you will be able to do, there will be things that they will not be able to do as well as they used to.

Answer 5

Think about how much more you know than a 10 year old - imagine how much more life he's lived at 42 than you! He could probably manipulate you and run mind games that would hurt you in the end. 22 years is too much of a difference. At 20, you haven't finished maturing and changing - you are too young to get married regardless. Hope that helps!

Answer 6

In this day and age it doesn't matter with the age difference, if you both have that chemistry together then go for it, who cares what other people think, my first marriage my wife was 16 and I was 22 and we had a great relation, but make sure this is what you really want; after awhile because of my first wife's age of 16 she started to go and mess around on me and it broke my heart. My second marriage is going on 18yrs. now and my wife is lost her sex drive and she's 55 and I'm 51 and I still have the same drive sexually as when I was with my first wife!, usually, no offense but through all my experiences in life and I've learned that women are the one's who loose their sex drive especially after they go through the change of life cycle, but a man never looses his, it's a proven medical fact!, so go with your own instinct and don't listen to anyone else but your own feelings, it's really up to the individual's themselves, if you really love this man go for it, he's a very lucky man to have a women like you to want him and not because of his age but because you have feelings for him, besides he would be more mature and probably has alot more to offer you, then some young guy who'd probably cheat on you anyway, I could only be so lucky to find a women who'd be like you. Even thou I still love my wife now, she can't give me some needs because of her physical & mental problems, sometimes I find myself being attracted to younger women, so it's really and shouldn't be and age issue, it's how you feel about each other!, Good Luck and if you love him, who cares about other people's opinion, go with your feelings!.

Answer 7

I knew someone 20 that married a 45 year old man. She is now 40 and spending all her time taking her husband to doctor's offices and nursing him thru surgeries etc. She doesn't have much of a life now. It's all wrapped around him, his illnesses and his pills.

You need to get an education, travel and have fun with life before getting married and settling down.

Answer 8

When I was 21, I dated a man who was 25 years older than I was. He was kind and we had a nice time. We dated for six years, but at the end of the day, he was done having kids and didn't want to start a family or get remarried. There was a generation gap, and in the end, it caught up with us. Please be careful, and don't squander your youth. You can't get it back. Best of luck

Answer 9

You've obviously got some issues from your childhood that need to be worked out with a good therapist if you're considering marrying someone old enough to be your dad. Just think, you weren't even born when he was in college, doesn't that creep you out, just a little? Age DOES matter and people will look at you 2 funny whenever they see you together. Go find someone your own age and leave daddy alone to find someone his age. I'm willing to be he's got kids around your age too.

Answer 10

when you are 40 and he is 62, you'll be in your prime and his sex drive will be as exciting as watching NASCAR reruns.

You have decades of difference in tastes of music, ideas of whats fun... what interests you... unless you've both adapted to what each other likes ..

then, if he's 42, does he want kids? Do you? If you do, then do you want an older father if you want to wait a few years to have kids?

Just some things to think about.