Wrong Body?

Question

I'm a 17 year old guy. For about a year now I have been wishing that I had been born a girl. I love girly stuff and how the female body is. I want to be able to wear pretty dresses and skirts, get my nails done, wear makeup, and wear a bikini. I feel like I have been cheated in life by being born a boy. I hate having a penis and being a guy, I want to have a vagina and breasts, and wear and do girly stuff. What should I do about this, and how can I tell my parents I want to be a girl? I don't believe they will understand. My only worry is actually getting surgery and then not looking like a pretty girl who looks like a genetic female.

Answer 1

IMHO I think Dianne has the right answer. If you're worried about having a female body and not being pretty then you're probably a crossdresser not a transexual

I'm a crossdresser, and I've read a fair number of articles on crossdressers and transexuals. It seems to me that most transexuals realise from a much earlier age that they were born into the wrong body - much earlier than 16yo.

I'd had a fascination with female clothing since I was 9 or 10 and went through similar feelings to you at around 17; but that was in the days before the wealth of information available on the internet. It did take a lot of reading, some counselling and serious soul-searching before I had the answer.

Now I know this is a bit cliche'ed, but with Halloween just around the corner you have an ideal opportunity to spend a day 100% in girl mode. It will at least give you the experience of wearing pretty things for a day, and to see how differently you and the rest of the world interact. Best part is you can do this under the banner of 'haloween' without having to have any awkward conversations.

If after haloween you still feel the need to talk to someone on a professional level, then try a counsellor. Your medical centre may have one, or perhaps you can get access to one via your college?

Assuming you've not spent a huge amount of time in a female role, here are some tips...

You have to have the total experience
* Shave arms, legs etc
* A thong won't work, so go for panties
* Of course, a bra. Tissue sort of works, but balloons filled with jell-o (jelly if you're in the UK), or rice works better as you'll get some idea of weight and your breasts will bounce a bit too. Line up the base of your bust with the inside joint of your elbow.
* Don't forget the pantyhose
* Wear a pair of heels

Your choice of outfit depends very much on your build
* If you're well built you'll not want to show off your muscles so wear a loose blouse with sleeves and a longer skirt. A-line and gypsy skirts can give an impression of hips!
* If you're slim, you can wear almost anything. Try a nice halter-neck dress or a mini-skirt with layered top.

If you've short hair, you'll probably need a wig

Don't forget to your make-up - that includes nails (get some stick-ons if yours are short)!!, and a purse (wallet, phone, keys etc plus hairbrush, hair ties, makeup)

For best effect, look at what girls of your age, build, height and culture wear every day. You may be really lucky and find a sympathetic female friend who'll go shopping with you.

Check out stores' returns policies just in case what you buy doesn't fit.

For haloween you could wear 'standard' girl clothes during the day; jumper, skirt, boots (it'll be cold) and then change for parties in the evening.

I've tried to put together some different characters with a halloweeen / magic theme for the parties...

* Morticia Adams - she's quite skinny in the films, but the dress gives you a chance to cover up if necessary

* Sabrina (the teenage witch). Great if you've got the legs as mini skirt required for this one!

* Hermione Granger or Ginny Weasly from the Harry Potter films. More a 'schoolgirl' theme here but still Haloween associated - grey pleated skirt, blouse and sweater. Add a gown or cape for 'school robes' and a pointed hat if you want
(Henrietta (the Worst Witch) also comes in this catagory)

* The Bride of Frankenstein - wedding dresses can be a great experience.

(or just go for a pretty party dress)

Hope everything works out OK

Answer 2

I can't imagine feeling this way and im sure that it is very difficult to deal with on a daily basis...sometimes I feel cheated that im gay, and wonder why I couldn't be the "norm" so i could actually have relationships...as to telling your parents, if they love you, which im sure they do, they will learn to accept and love you for who you choose to be or to become...of course it will come as a shock and it will be difficult and awkard in the beginning, but that is to be expected. Try to explain it to them as you explained it to the people on this site...you are beautiful regardless of who you want to be or what you want to be and I only wish you good thoughts and luck in your future!!!

Answer 3

So you think you're transsexual?

Sorry to be the one to break it to you, but if your ONLY worry is that you 'won't look pretty', then you're NOT transsexual.

If you were born transsexual, it doesn't matter to you how pretty or not you are; what matters is BEING WHO YOU ARE.
I suspect that you're a budding transvestite, but if you genuinely believe that you have Benjamin's syndrome, I recommend that you speak to a counsellor with experience in gender issues; he or she will be able to help you determine who you really are, and what to do about it.

Answer 4

Start by talking with your parents and any siblings first.