Do women excel at giving verbal abuse?

Question

This is a sort of double question. First, are women instinctively better at dishing out invective and verbal abuse than men? Second, who is the better at genuine debate, men or women? Let's take it as read that individuals vary one from the other. Just women as a group as opposed to men as a group.

Answer 1

I think both men and women can dish out quite vicious verbal abuse. But here's the clencher...most men would still rather take verbal abuse than to reciprocate and be labeled an abuser. Women get all sorts of passes from PMS all the way to some type of societal pendulum swing. After all, we've all seen episodes of COPS where both the man and woman were equally to blame for a domestic disturbance, but the man was usually the one to be hauled off to jail.

Answer 2

I think women are in a way better at verbal abuse than men. Women are the ones that have to stay at home with the kids more often. They are the ones that have to correct the kids when the father is at work. Just right there in correcting the kids is building up a lot of experience in how to verbally abuse someone. Then of course with the man in the traditional role as head of the household it boils down to two ways for the woman to get what she wants:

1.) Either make him really happy. Or...
2.) Verbally abuse him until he gives in

As far as a debate, I think that really depends on the topic. Men are more ones to assess the details quickly, get it correct the first time, and get it done. That can be seen in the layout of department stores. Women take more time to shop and will kind of check out the store. Men on the other hand go into the store already having in mind what they want. That is why many times you will see men's items WAY in the back and women's items right in the front. The longer a person sees something in front of them the better the chance the store has to get them to impulse buy. Look at Walmart for instance. All of the sporting goods, automotive stuff, tools, etc are in the back. Of course they do that on purpose. They make billions of dollars and you know they do tons of research on peoples shopping habits. That's why grocery stores like Kroger like getting them to use their discount cards, to learn their shopping habits.

In general, to me, the better debator normally depends on the length of the debate. The longer the debate lasts the better women fare in the debate. Women can use the verbal abuse to their advantage and wear down the male debators over time unless the male is very staunch in his opinion that he is correct. Women are more about details and men are more about function. So if it is a does it work or not argument, the man will typically win. If it is an argument that gets into a lot of little details, women can be very meticulous on those accounts and fare better.

Answer 3

I don't know about most women, but if I'm in a tiff with the hubby, I have been known to have total recall of every negative thing he's done in the last twenty years. So, he's cautious when it comes to pointing out any flaw in my character because for me, it's like pushing the gas pedal on a dragster...Vrroomm.. it's on. Not a wonderful trait I have and I've learned over the years to control and abstain from using that power. It's like I had (have) a YakBack that recorded it all. Maybe it was my defense mechanism from the past. I only use my power for good now! ha.

Answer 4

Women in general are more emotionally abusive than men, but some men take the cake and are the most verbally abusive of all. You see, I consider indirect communication to be a form of abuse. I'd never communicate indirectly with someone I love, and have zero empathy/sympathy for women who do it with their men. Women are, in general, just as good as men at debates in every other area than gender relations. Women tend to have more trouble than men accepting reality with regards to the subject of this forum.

Answer 5

Woman can be cold,callous, and malicious when it comes to verbal abuse. We have a tendency to cut deep and go for the jugular when arguing. Statically when young kids are faced with adolescent pressures and self esteem issues it usually young girls who are mistreated by other girls. Girls learn at a young age (as early as elementary school to be socially cruel. Whereas boys and men will manifest their bad behavior physically. As far as debates, victory is based upon preparation. An arrogant woman will always believe she's right no matter how ill prepared. A sensible woman will now her limits,accept defeat, and acknowledge the skill of her competitor and better prepare herself for the next time.

Answer 6

Yes, women are excellent at verbal abuse.

As far as who is better at genuine debate, the person who is best prepared generally is best, although negotiation skill and one's ability to think quickly also play a role.

Answer 7

Women are better at playing devils advocate (which is why it is ironic that Devils Advocate is a man lol) because they can usually see both sides. Men are better at verbal abuse and chiding because women are more sensitive and may not say the real dirty dead on clincher.

As far as debate I think we are equal. A lot of variables to take into account -the venue, the audience, the topic, etc.

Answer 8

Women on both counts; women are naturally more catty and vicious when it comes to trouncing someone in an argument; second, they are far more stubborn and would win any debate out of sheer stamina and will.

Answer 9

Gender plays no role.

Abusive individuals are abusive individuals. Period. Self-defense is not the same thing as retaliatory abuse. Retaliatory actions can lead to things spiralling dangerously out of control...but this often happens when people feel they can't exit the dysfunctional relationship. They get stuck in a trap.

ANYONE who abuses anyone else is in ANY manner is - somewhere along the line - a few bricks short of a full load. How many 'bricks' one is working with has nothing to do with gender; instead, it varies individual-to-individual. No psychologist anywhere would suggest that the propensity to abuse others - in ANY form - is indicative of good mental health. Rather, the REVERSE is true.

Most victims of the most serious kinds of abuse are female. Take a look - we are dealing with a CONTINUUM of abuse here.
So-called 'verbal abuse' falls under the umbrella heading of 'emotional/psychological abuse' - and women - once again, surprise surprise - are more likely to be victims than men:

'Types of Abuse'

1. Physical Assaults — includes punching, clapping, choking, kicking, throwing things, burning, use of weapons or murder

2. Sexual Assaults — includes unwanted touching, forced sexual activities, sex as punishment

3. Emotional/Psychological Abuse — includes demeaning comments, name calling, threats, threats of suicide, threats of violence against the children or relatives, threats of desertion, terrorizing, verbal attacks against the victim’s personality, beliefs or behavior, controlling activities or deprivation.

Common Characteristics of Victims of Violence

-Most likely to be a woman, although men are abused.
-Has a strong emotional dependency on the partner.
-Loses sight of what is "normal."
-Begins to accept the situation as normal.
-Has an unrealistic hope the situation will get better.
-Feels loyalty toward the offender.
-Experiences low self-esteem.
-Accepts "blame" for the situation.
-Tends to be compliant.
-Is often socially and emotionally isolated.

The Abuser

Donald Dutton describes three types of abusers in his book The Batterer, a Psychological Profile

1. Psychopathic Abusers
- absence of remorse
unrealistic view of the future
- history of both violent and nonviolent criminal activity
-change is unlikely because this abuser is unable to learn from experiences.

2. Overcontrolled Abusers - control freak
- emotional manipulation of victim
- meticulous
- perfectionist
- destroys the victim’s sense of themselves as an individual — they become an extension of their abuser

3. Cyclical Abuser - stereotypical abuser
- predictable patterns of escalating tension, violent outbursts and periods of denial or atonement
- see the victim as simultaneously engulfing them and abandoning them
- emotional intimacy is both desired and feared
- often described as two people — the one he presents to the victim and the one he presents to others
- hold victim responsible for his feelings and actions'

Answer 10

sigh

On the one hand, you claim to understand that people vary.

On the other hand, you want to pretend that that's not so.

If you take all women, the differences between them are much greater than any "average" or summary statistic differs from that of men taken as a whole.

There are verbally abusive people of both sexes; and people of both sexes who aren't abusive.

There are good and bad debaters of both sexes.

Why do you ignore fact, in search of lies?