I looked it up and its this object you sit on and um... well you look it up. I'm not getting flagged. Anyway, I asked my sister about it and she told me should didn't care being she rather her use it then go out and get knocked up with boys.
My sister's husband however highly disagrees. He said if I buy it for her for her birthday, she can have it. But she would be grounded for a long time for receiving the gift and that she would have to get used to being in her room between school. I think its unfair.
Anyway, Is this an inapproriate gift? I just want to give her what she wants and my sister is ok with it.
2007-10-29 03:16:18 · 30 answers · asked by CuriousMaude 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
I agree 100% with your sister, and I see nothing at all wrong with her having a sex toy, esspecialy that they know she is already sexualy active, but Sybians are expensive. I'm 31 now, and I was allowed to have sex toys at her age, not a $1,400 Sybian though. Maybe you or her mother should buy her a cheaper sex toy. If money isn't an issue, I see nothing at all wrong with her having it and using it, I completly disagree with your brother-in-law.
2007-10-29 14:38:37 · answer #1 · answered by chocolate4vanilla76 3 · 2⤊ 2⤋
It's definitely an inappropriate gift for you to give your niece. If your sister is so "okay" with it, then she can go ahead and get it for her daughter, but because her husband doesn't want her to have it, she hasn't done it, so why would you ever -dream- of doing it? It's obvious the father doesn't want his daughter to have this, and would probably take it away from her anyway, so what's the point? Don't be stupid and buy her this gift.
Step away from this mess, and don't bring up the subject again.
2007-10-29 07:49:10 · answer #2 · answered by Zyggy 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
on the cost of that request = no
given the split between the decision of the parents
given that you did great asking both parents
given that the niece has found and began exploring her maturing parts... and her mom is open...
I would get her a 'normal' 14 yr old gift, like a hoodie, or music, or journal...
then, take her and your sister (kids mom) out to lunch and have a girl talk... be open as you can about everything she askes unless it broaches YOUR private life. let her know somethings about HER life are private and help guide her on those boundries. being supportive with out being judgemental is key. each child is a case by case project to be handled with Love honesty compassion consistency boundaries and openness. there is not one answer that is the right answer. just a series of never ending choices followed by hugs and good lucks...
make the lunch date a weekly or monthly thing, stay in touch with the both of them... sounds like your niece will need the support of two woman she trusts... that is a thing to applaud
good luck
2007-10-30 06:38:24 · answer #3 · answered by red beard 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I, personally, would not buy this for either of my neices. I understand that they are sexual beings, and will eventually explore their sexuality. However, I would not give consent for them to use this, which is borderline pornographic.
A girl of 14, if she so chooses, needs to personally explore her body. She needs to understand that the more comfortable she is with herself, the more able she will be communicate her needs with her partner, when the time is appropriate. (At the age of 14, there should be NO partners.) There are no amount of machines which can substitute for knowing yourself.
In addition, as an aunt, I would be more concerned with having a conversation about abstinence, faith, birth control, and STDs -- not machines which assist in personal pleasure.
14 year olds should be concerned with school, friends, etc.
Lastly, if your sister believes this to be an appropriate gift for her daughter, then you should allow her to purchase it. You DO NOT want to be caught in the middle of this battle, since it is obvious the child's father obviously has COMMON SENSE!
2007-10-29 11:45:57 · answer #4 · answered by ToniSB 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
No it's not ok. That thing will turn her into a raging nympho. It feels good at first and she'll have orgasm in like 10 seconds at first. After a while he synapses in her brain will fry and the nerve ending in her vagina will become noresponsive. The result is she'll have sit there longer and longer to achieve the O. Once that thing isn't doing it for her any longer she'll be left with a sex habit. A 14 yr old with a sex habit is a whole lot worse that a horney 14 yr old experimenting.
2007-10-29 03:23:28 · answer #5 · answered by ZX3R 6 · 6⤊ 0⤋
So after looking it up, I have to agree with your brother in law. That is a very inappropriate gift for a 14 year old!
2007-10-29 04:07:05 · answer #6 · answered by Kaylin 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
WOW - - I love how close minded people can be.
I believe it to be a cruel joke on a teen that their hormones are going completely insane and all anyone tells them is basically to ignore their body completely. Most people don't have a problem with boys masturbating, but for some reason, when a girl has the same desires as their counterparts, it abhorent.
The options teens have are to have sex. I firmly hope that all parents will discuss the risks with their children, but I know it doesn't happen. There are many options to intercourse, but parents don't discuss those either. What do parents expect from teens?
If all parents who teach their children abstinence were abstinent themselves, it would be different, but it seems that parents and schools alike are ignoring the fact that teens are hormonal. Though you think you are keeping them ignorant by not telling them, you are actually sending them into a battle completely unarmed and with no intelligence. Their bodies are reacting, and their minds have no fuel to fight because they don't know about the risks. They don't understand about diseases, and they don't comprehend that a baby can cost them an education, a career of their choosing, socializing with friends, etc.
WAKE UP, PEOPLE!!!!!!!!!!
2007-10-29 03:38:08 · answer #7 · answered by Allison P 4 · 8⤊ 2⤋
Well, it sounds like your family is very open. My suggestion would be to give her the money if that's what she wants, she can purchase it.
Don't go over the line and cross her father. She might enjoy being punished to her room if you know what I mean. I just can't imagine buying that for my niece but it's not my decision.
2007-10-29 03:24:09 · answer #8 · answered by Momma K 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
i think that gift is for the age of like 18 or 21. NOT 14.
thats a little crazy.
but do what you want. it doesn't seem like the husband is going for it though.. so try not to make him too upset.
goodluck :)
2007-10-29 05:39:38 · answer #9 · answered by shelby :) 2 · 4⤊ 0⤋
You're kidding right? This is HIGHLY innappropraite gift for anyone, no matter what their age. If someone wants sex toys, then they should buy them with their own money, not have them being given as gifts.
2007-10-29 03:41:37 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 6⤊ 0⤋