My boyfriend is in the army and we moved in together and he isnt showing me any affection or caring about me. I found out later he watchs porn looks at porn.. breathes porn. we stoped having sex about 1 week ago because he couldnt get it up. Im not sure if its because of me. but then i found out he goes on those websites that you interacted with women and on his profile it said he was single, Im worried about this because I cant just move out that easily. He got back from iraq about 3 weeks ago and says his feeling emotional numb and having bad dreams and flash backs. his so distant and everytime i ask questions he pulls back at me. im really worried. and he watched me cry and didnt even come to hold me. i feel like his not there when he is. he doesnt even feel like doing anything.
2007-10-28 20:24:09 · 12 answers · asked by Mimi 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
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2007-10-29 16:35:21 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You feel like you want to help and be there for your man and I am going to tell you exactly how to do that. Do nothing. Yes, he needs time to deal with what ever issue he has. After a month or so he should be ready mentally to come back to you. If this does not happen then I advice you both to go to therapy together. Until then do not smother him. For yourself find someone close to help you deal with what you are feeling and going through right now. Good luck, sweetie.
2007-10-29 03:33:48 · answer #2 · answered by the_blue_dem0n 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Aww sweetheart, I feel bad that you moved in with a guy like him. I guess talk to him if he wants to go to some counsellor with you and see if he is acting this way because of all what he saw in Iraq.
Then see what happens from there. Also talk to the people that love you and are close to you like your family and close friends.
Wishing you the best.
2007-10-29 03:29:01 · answer #3 · answered by Evelyn 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He needs counseling!! Many of the guys that go to war need counseling. You need to have a talk with him, and if theat does not work, with his family about getting help for him.
I would put my foot down about the single profile on the website.
2007-10-29 03:28:01 · answer #4 · answered by PEGGY S 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He probably cares for you, but no longer has that "same" love for you. He needs to go to WOA, wanks off anonymous, and you should stay out of the picture....faaaaaaar out of the picture.
Just think that it was fun while it lasted, but sorry you cant compete with the ranks of porn celebs.
2007-10-29 03:28:59 · answer #5 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Porn is normal for guys. But, the emotional distance is a problem. You may want to see a professional together.
2007-10-29 03:28:28 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
sorry but flash backs and emotionally numb is all bull sht
id say dump him and leave him with his porn sites
i would do anythng except watching my gf or any girl freind crys
and if he just sat there doing nthng , then hes just an as-hole
2007-10-29 03:30:44 · answer #7 · answered by Jeff 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Girl, that is not you. that's the war did that to him.
As someone already mentioned, he needs counseling.
If you care about him, don't ask him any question, don't accuse him for watching porn (it's not a bad thing). Just try to be around him when he needs you. Hug him a lot.
2007-10-29 03:30:12 · answer #8 · answered by ONE MAD GURL 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It sounds like he has major issues. You need to protect yourself. If you had a daughter and she was in your shoes what would you tell her to do? Your aren't married, and you don't have kids together....Get out. If he loves you and wants to make you happy he'll fix whatever is bothering him. Don't waste the best years of your life.
2007-10-29 03:34:03 · answer #9 · answered by steffi 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
geez, this must be hard for you is it?
maybe watching all those porn is his way to counter those war experiences he had etc... but i think he should be concerned for you... are you sure he saw you when you cried? do you guys talk... you two need to communicate... it is essential.
2007-10-29 03:29:35 · answer #10 · answered by pristine 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋