Not an active drinker, but one in recovery who carries the "mentality" as they did when they were active?
How do you handle it?
2007-10-28 19:14:19 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I am in alanon, have been for a year, as for him, I have no control over when or how he works his program
2007-10-28 19:30:36 · update #1
Hi Anjel! It's called being a "dry drunk"! You don't handle it. He does. And hopefully his sponsor. It is the same response as if he was actively drinking. He needs to be responsible for the behavior he is exhibiting. With or without alcohol.
2007-10-28 19:22:20 · answer #1 · answered by dizzkat 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
What you describe, I've heard called a "dry drunk."
That type of mentality can make one cranky, squirrel-y, and downright hard to be around.
For the one on the "receiving" end, the answer is usually prayer for that person. Having patience, tolerance, and pity for the person who has such mentality may be a difficult think for the recipient to do. Not engaging in battle can help.
In the meantime, hopefully, the person of such mentality, will eventually see themselves in the mirror and have a desire to become someone better.
(Hence, this is what working the "12-Step Program" is all about. AA and Al-Anon.)
Good luck, and God bless all who are involved.
P.S. If you're talking about a teenager... (I saw another question that made me wonder)... then God bless whoever is involved. Sometimes it's hard being a single mom to teenagers, period.
2007-10-29 02:31:39 · answer #2 · answered by C Sunshine 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, you are right, you don't have control over how someone works their program. Sometimes that irritability, and discomfort can become worse after being sober for years. I'm not sure what the al-anons say about it, but surely it must have become an issue for others. I'd just talk to my sponsor if I were you.
2007-10-28 20:09:04 · answer #3 · answered by grouch2111 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
The Lord knoweth how to deliver the godly out of temptations, and to reserve the unjust unto the day of judgment to be punished: 2 Peter 2:9
Sister our Father is the King, you are His faithful daughter and He will see you through this.God Bless You my dear sister with honor and glory that can only come from our Father.
2007-10-28 20:13:54 · answer #4 · answered by don_steele54 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
He is not in recovery as he is still acting like a drunk. he needs to go to AA and you need alanon now.
2007-10-28 19:26:20 · answer #5 · answered by ♥ Mel 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
My second husband was an alcoholic, one year of that nonsense and I walked with my clothes and my sanity, that's all that I wanted!! I wish I could be more help on this one!! Good Luck!!
2007-10-28 19:39:50 · answer #6 · answered by Ginny 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
go to counseling with this person, and you need counseling also.. it is very hard to deal with one that is working to stay off the booze, they go though many changes and take you there also. good luck to you
2007-10-28 19:31:17 · answer #7 · answered by churchonthewayseniors 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Get away from that person.
If they don't treat you right - why let them be a part of your life?
2007-10-28 19:18:36 · answer #8 · answered by ... 5 · 0⤊ 2⤋