What are your thoughts on this?

Question

Do you think that we should allow relationships to grow naturally without putting restrictions or expectations on them?
(This is prior to taking any vows of marriage).

Answer 1

Obviously. This is the time when you are learning about someone and if that is the person you plan on spending quite some time with. If you don't put any boundaries on that person during this time, you'll find out (maybe) what they are truly about. If they are still true to you and a person you enjoy then you can proceed in evolving into something more.
Of course, maybe Mr. Player just has his game down and knows not to be a Horses *** during this stage...knows not to stay out all night with the guys during this new time with you, etc. Nothing surprises me anymore. But I still think you have a better chance of finding out who someone is if you just let them "be themselves" during this time. Actually even ...encourage it. They'll think they're doing good and you have a chance to run the other way.

Answer 2

To a certain extent, yes. However I think we as a society have place too little emphasis on the importance of sex. We have allowed it to become a basic commodity between two people that like each other, instead of expecting to save it for someone special. Sure, waiting until marriage may not be practical any more, but do people need to sleep with everyone they like?

Answer 3

Absolutely. That being said, if there is something that is really important to you one way or the other, you should feel comfortable enough with your partner to let it be known. Also, as far as expectations are concerned, how much time have you invested in the person? At a certain point, expectations are a natural occurrence. It really depends on the relationship.

Answer 4

Yes I do, although if later on someone did decide to marry it may be hard to change the way of thinking. Most relationships would be much less stressful and more enjoyable without the expectations and restrictions we place on them.

Answer 5

Well ya thats usually how it works atleast in the beginning till there is a "true" commitment made.. most people meet..then become friends to see if they click, then they become romantically involved.. but as time goes by, a commitment is made, and when that happens then usually thats where the expectations come into play, to see if it can go on to the next level..

Answer 6

No you have to know what you are looking for in any relationship otherwise you are just wasting your time. I wouldn't call them restrictions but definitely you have your boundaries in place and you are yourself. Expectations? Well after you know you are serious about the relationship that is O.K.

Answer 7

yes, they need to not have expectations or restrictions, but then again you don't need to think too much, act on your passion for each other. friendship is a good start for some people and some times if your just totally attracted to someone don't hold back just go for it!

Answer 8

It's worked for my fiance and I so far! Granted, we were both anti-relationship when we met so it wasn't hard not having expectations. I can honestly say that we both used caution and just allowed time to take it's toll on us. It's been a great 4 years!

Answer 9

yes, remember, two people - two lives. to restrict someone or expect of them is not getting to know the true person.

Answer 10

yes i do! i use to let my husband go to strip clubs or go with friends to a club and i had no problem with it. especially strip clubs, his family would ask me how could u let him go? well i guess u would have to have a very high self esteem of your self, i was there at one time, but now that things have changed i no longer have that trust in him. but things are much better when u trust the other so much, because regardless of where he is at u know that u can trust him.