The end of my love story please give me advice?

Question

I recently came to an end with my feelings for my relationship. My husband of 2 yrs never loved me. Always said he loved me, but wasn't in love with me. We got married treated me like I wasn't ever good enough etc. I still kept giving my all in the relationship. I told him yesterday if he wants to save our marriage he needs to come for two-three days and be with me. He wrote me back and email saying basically he'll come pick me up end of nov when I am ready to come back to him. I wanted to talk to him face to face and figure things out, instead he gave me a notice of two days of picking me up in nov . Anyways, he failed in my eyes but I still was holding on to hope that he would come. But, I cried and cried and cried like someone was dieing. I accidently sent him a text and he called me saying what I wanted and what have i decided for our relationship. I heard noises in the back and asked him where he was, he was out with friends. THAT WAS IT FOR ME! I am sitting here cryin for

someone who is out partying and basically fine that his wife has told him we are seperating. Maybe he isn't taking me seriosuly, but tomorrow ia m filing for seperation. I;ve had enough..i went bisrik on him icalled ack and tld him he can go **** HIM SELF AND HE CAN KISS MY *** OUR MARRIAGE IS OVER! I meant every day word i said. Now the pain is there of the seperation, but he truly didn't deserve me...what do you think did I do the right thing. I've been trying very hard for many years now to make this relationship work and it obviously hasn't. ADIVCE?

Answer 1

It takes two to make a marriage work. If the other partner is not willing to give their share then it is best that you move on with your life and you will find someone who deserves to be with you. There will be pain and suffering as if someone has died. You have lost a loved one who you thought you would spend the rest of your life with. In order to get past it, you will go through the stages of grief of lossing a loved one. Best of luck to you..

Answer 2

To say that he never loved you is kinda harsh.
Was this a forced marriage..
You say that he is out partying... I take it that you are a very young couple?

I ask a question in regards to relationships the other day and someone sent me a link to :

http://www.unitedmarriage.org/

It looked interesting but I am 34 and was married for 11 years. Been divorced for 3...

If he is interested in saving the marriage it is something that you will both have to work on. You have heard the saying that there are 3 sides to every story.
yours, his and then the truth.
Someone must be willing to step up to the plate and say you know what I have done some things wrong and I am sorry. A lot of time people let their ego get in the way and are to proud to admit any fault.

I should know. Although there were faults on both sides of my marriage I was not willing to step up at the time. I see that now but now is a day late and a dollar short.

It takes 2 to make things work. All you can do is try.

Good luck and I hope it works out for you. Just do what ever you need to do to be happy. 3 years from now you should not have to look back and see that there is something that you should have done differently. Do it differently today so there are no regrets.

Good luck..

CS ---

Answer 3

Dont hold on to the hope he'll change now if he still hasnt tried making a turning point yet. 2 yrs of marriage.. yet love can fade so fast. Is that worth holding onto if he doesnt even treasure your thoughts or try to compromise enough? A marriage takes 2. If either one doesnt give or compromise, it wont turn out well anyhow. Move on.. Find someone that's more worthy of you. Be strong. The more delay, the more pain there'll be. Thank your lucky stars you're out early. One day you'll be a happy person with a happier man, turn back, scoffs, and be grateful. I wish you all the best. Dont hold on to something that wont work like my mum did.(just for the kids)She finally filed for divorce and she's a much happier person these days. All the best!

Answer 4

It would be enough for me. You said that he is not in love with you. Girl, you deserve someone that loves you. You need to make yourself happy and not settle for this man that will not give the time to have a conversation with you. You will probably cry a little more but that is alright. When you are done pick yourself up and get your life together. This time make yourself the most important thing and don't look back. It will be hard at first but in the long run you will be better off. Do not ever settle again. Good luck to you.

Answer 5

There are no stock answers or text book solutions for matters such as you now find yourself confronting.

There are some points that may assist you, however, and they are meant here humbly and only as some point of reference.

Keep in mind always that almost everyone alive has faced dilemas of relationships wherein we find ourselves overwhelmed. Many people are left heartbroken and confused. Yet they are able to summon a faith in themselves and the knowledge that there will be another day that is brighter and more rewarding.

Try not to allow other people's actions, i.e., your husband, to influence your opinion of yourself.

If, as you say, you have given your best effort to making this relationship work, then you should be proud of your effort in a very uncooperative environment.

Look to the future, protect yourself legally, and remember always who you are while preventing anyone from lowering your own self esteem by their insensitive and selfish behavior.

Sincerely Yours,

Michael

Answer 6

Have you noticed that you are reacting with emotion and he is reacting with thought. He seems stable, steady, calm, and you seem freaked out, emotional, and reacting without thought. Hoping that your instincts will kick in and make the correct decisions. I don't think he is in the right at all, but, unfortunately I don't think you are either. I mean we have supposedly evolved away from using our instincts and relied on our wisdom to steer us through the rough waters. Yet here we are trying to let our emotions run our decisions. Listen girl! You need to sit down, and just sit there until you get control of your emotions. Then think of a way to get through to that bone head husband of yours so HE will understand that there is more at stake here than losing a girl that he once loved. I mean if all that happened to him was he gets free nookie for a few years, he gets bored and treats you poorly for a while knowing you would say "enough" and walk away, .......well..... Hell, I would enjoy that scenario. He needs to know that there will be repercussions to this stupid reasoning! Once you spell out, D.I.V.O.R.C.E. in words he can understand, he will start communicating. Lets start talking alimony, lets start talking child support (well, how was you to know that you aren't really pregnant?) Start spelling out court costs, lost wages, garnished wages, etc... Girl, it's time to get mature! He thinks you as an emotional little girl, you need to be adult acting, and ticked off!

Answer 7

You made the right choice and in time you will realize it he doesn't care about you because if he did he would put you first, what is wrong with men today is all they want is a good time and to treat their wives like maidsthat wait on them hand and foot, so good riddens to bad rubbish.Move on with your life and make sure you get a lawyer and ask the lawyer to put it in your divorce papers that the husband has to pay for you lawyer.

Answer 8

Love is not True Love unless it is returned. It's time to move on. It's okay to let go even when you love someone. I do not understand why you would believe that you should put yourself thru such heartache for love.

Dust yourself off and good riddance. You should practice a new visual of what love really looks like to you and Please leave him out of the picture.

Answer 9

a relationship is based off of two people and no matter how hard one of you try to make this work, if the other one does not want to... your efforts are in vain, you are trying to succeed in a cause that will ultimately fail... i hate to be that crude and honest, but its the truth, you want it to work but does he want this to work is the question. Good woman .. kind-hearted... you be strong and let this chapter end, knowing that you tried and you gave your all and that this person did not see the effort.

Answer 10

I think the main character's partner should die. Something overly tragic, to devastate the reader. Like accidentally hit by a car. Or . . . something like that . . . yes....He gets jumped by old enemies because he forgot to pay a debt. You can stem ideas off of these or just take them =) Hope this helps!