Gays Only!! Please I need serious help!?

Question

I am gay and have a crush on my friend. I'm not sure if he is gay or not. He is really cute and i want us to be closer then friends. How do I make a move on him? Also I am definately not telling him I'm gay. I just can't... Just please answer and help me make a move on him! thnx

Answer 1

just invite him over, make a move like put your arm around him, and see what he does
if he likes it then good job
but if he doesnt say it was like a bug on his shoulder

Answer 2

It really depends on your situation, and his.

Sadly, as a gay person, the odds of someone being 'on the same team' as you at random is pretty low, and if you 'like' people without knowing anything about their sexual preferences first, you're going to have to get used to a lot of rejections (some of them very unkind, and possibly violent) for every success.

One option is to subtly try to get information out of him first: if something pops up in the news or among your friends about a gay person, use it as an opportunity to talk about it with him, and, if he's receptive, lead it into a personal but hypothetical conversation about how he feels and if he's ever experimented or been curious about it. This way, if he turns out to be very clearly straight or even homophobic, you can get some hints without having to tell him you're gay and into him, which could potentially weird him out and ruin the friendship (this is true in any kind of a friendship where there's an attraction; it can be hard to act like everything's normal when you suddenly find out that someone you think of as a friend 'likes' you).

Your other, bolder option is simply to come out. This can be a traumatic experience and can lose you some friends, but ultimately they're not friends you want to have anyway (people who can't accept you for what you are), and you will probably end up finding friends you didn't know you had. In any case, once you're publicly gay, then the people you associate with are much more likely to be gay and/or accepting of gay people. So once you come out, if you let a friend know you like them, they at least won't be as likely to be shocked, and will be much more likely to be receptive.

So, whichever is more appropriate to your situation. But I should note that eventually, you'll want to come out, and if you don't yet, you're just putting it off. But then, putting it off can be appropriate if your current situation's just not right.

Answer 3

I think when you make a move on him the cat will kind of be out of the bag about you being gay. If you can't live otherwise, then just come out and tell him how you feel, or tell him you have feelings about men without mentioning him particularly. Then that will give him time to respond without being too pressured. If you just jump on him expect him to freak out.

Answer 4

Make an excuse to do something, then just make a move on him. Look deep in his eyes then kiss him.

Don't talk about it first, closeted guys get weirded out by that so it's better to just make it so they "want it" and get caught up in the moment without thinking too much, if you know what I mean.

Answer 5

you cant just make a freakin move on him and "definitely not tell him" you're gay!! thats absurd...grow a set and man up!talking is the only way to know for sure and not make an a@# of yourself.

Answer 6

if you cant tell him you are gay then there is no way you make a move and possibly be closer then friends.

you are deluding yourself and probably going to ruin your friendship...

Answer 7

a) Come out of the closet and see what happens

b) Stop trying to be more than friends.

Answer 8

ul never no if u dont tell him ure gay

Answer 9

just leave it as a crush and pursue someone else.

Answer 10

If you can't tell him, than your not going to get anywhere with him.