is he cheating or just not attracted to me anymore?

Question

when i was pregnant i didn't want sex. and he would get mad at me. now that i've had the baby and want sex he gets mad that i do want it. is he getting it some where else. like this morning in bed i was playing with him. and he didn't even say or do anything and today i said why don't we lay the kids down and go play and he went and layed ans went to sleep. is he cheating or not attracted to me anymore

Answer 1

ask him

Answer 2

Red flag! He got mad at you when you were pregnant and did not want sex?? Excuse me, but when you are carrying an 8 pound bowling ball in your belly, sometimes we just are not in the mood!!! My wonderful husband of 15 years fully understood that, now yours on the other hand was being selfish and only thinking of himself and his needs and not you or your health or the baby's health, he put more stress on you by bugging you with the sex issue the whole time you were pregnant, wrong. JMO and only JMO people.

Honey, you have to make him understand that you just gave birth to an 8 pound bowling ball, through you know where, and you HURT!!! It takes a while to heal after all that you and the baby went through.

I think he feels jealous that you are spending more time with the children and not him, a lot of men feel this way after their wives have given birth, and the wives are dedicating their lives to the new addition to the family.

A lot of men have this pre-conceived notion that it is going to be all swell after the wife pops out the baby and their needs will automatically be met, and when they are not, then they act like babies themselves.

I suggest counseling, and if that does not work then you need to think about your happiness, and the happiness of your children, children are smart, and they can sense the negativity in your household and so can the baby, before it gets any worse, take action, go to counseling, or if that does not work out, leave him.

File for a seperation, remember, children first.

They are the ones that suffer the most.

Answer 3

Communication is essential for any relationship, especially marriage. If you had a child or two with this man you should know him fairly well by now. If he is cheating he would be acting different even in a small way. A way that any woman would be able to pick up. When a man cheats he gets nervous and that is automatically a sign that he is guilty. Maybe he is just being stubborn. Guys tend to do that when they don't get their way, I mean, how often you see a guy stop to ask for directions before he gets lost? I don't think he lost interest or attraction, maybe it is something at the job or maybe something at home is bothering him. Analyze the whole situation and see if this answer helps out at all.

Answer 4

My husband did the very same thing to me in bed,i started playing around with him and i even went down on him and no response what so ever. My feelings were so hurt and he knew it but did not care. I still didn't want to believe he was cheating on me until a month later when he told me he had been thinking of moving out and getting his own place. Yep he was cheating alright with a co-worker. How many times have you heard someone say or maybe you read it on here that if you think your husband is cheating on you then 9 out of 10 times he is. You will ignore the signs for a little while longer hoping it's just in your head and praying he will deny it. This could go on for a very long time and that is what he is counting on you playing dumb.

Answer 5

He may still feel resentment over the fact that you didn't want to have sex when you were pregnant. You need to talk to him and find out why he won't have sex with you. If he still holds this over your head then you need to explain that it was a tough time for you to have sex while being pregnant. You need to convince him that it wasn't personal. Men take rejection really harsh and sometimes need to be re-affirmed that they are still "The One". And for all you girls that automatically assume he is cheating..well sorry you got cheated on but projecting your experiences and scaring off people does not make your situation better.

Answer 6

It could be any number of reasons. Sure cheating is always a possibility when a loved one is acting this way, but also take into account..could work be stressing him out, could there be family problems that he's worrying about?
I'd sit him down and tell him what you're feeling. If he gets defensive then there might be something to worry about. If he's got nothing to hide then he'll be sincere and honest with you.

Answer 7

Signs of cheating:
Change in appearance; new diet, hair color/style, clothing, etc
Change in tastes; music, food, etc
Volunteering too much information unasked
Loss of interest in sex
Your gut instincts

There is the possibility he found another outlet during your pregnancy, but I wouldn't judge on that alone, check out the list. He might just be trying to retaliate for your loss of interest; men can be terrible babies sometimes.

Answer 8

if he enjoyed sex before, and he doesn't now, he must have someone on the side. his heart may be somewhere else. even if u confront him he may not be honest with u, because honesty would mean confrontation if he were cheating. follow him, or have a friend do it. look at his cell, there is something wrong when they don't want u anymore, and it usually means he is getting it elsewhere.

Answer 9

Communicate with him find out whats going on. Most times men become jealous after a baby is born and become distant because you are spending so much time with the baby and not as much time with him.

Answer 10

that SOB is cheating, you know you feel it in your gut!!! Sorry.
My now ex told me for 4 month one time that i just don't turn him on. That put a dent in your self esteem. Now he is with a 15 years younger girl who can't flush the toilett. I hope that SOB catches hell.
Your hubby is up to no good, go investigsate some you know we women are good at that. You have to know ok. Than you make your move.
Good luck.

Answer 11

He may just be feeling rejected and rather than tell you in words, he's playing it out in his actions.

You need to open up the doors of communication, get the ball rolling and rather than "plan" something with him....take your guy by surprise.....spice things up a little and YOU take control.