is my wife still cheating?

Question

a couple of months ago i found some text messages on my wifes cell phone. they were under a girls name but were talking about sex. I confronted my wife and she told me that it was this guy that we knew in highschool that i could not stand. she promised that it would never happen again and told me the reason she did it is because i acted like i didn't love her anymore and i never had time for her because i am always at work. So about a month ago i ran her credit report and it said that she had stoped working in july but she still tells me that she works. i have been paying all of the bills in the house for are whole marriage now, and yesterday i cleaned out her car and found a bunch of withdraw recipets from an acount that she has of her own for like 1600 dollars form last month. she has been telling me she has no money after paying the car payment, but yesterday i got a call from the finance company saying she has not made a payment in 2 months. she will not leave here cell phone near

she won't leave her phone near me and freaks out everytime i get on the computer about how i am spying on her still. Latly she has been comming home from school kinda late. and recently she has been extra dolled up and dressed up for her suposed work. and at night when i come home we will just lay in bed we don't have sex anymore that often and if we do it is not as intense, but even on nights that we don't have sex together her vaginal area kinda has that recently had sex smell to it. what sould i do, is she cheating on me, how would i find out.

Answer 1

Divorce her now before she ruins your credit, it sounds like she has an addiction and wasting her money on it.

Answer 2

You should already know that she's cheating!
One, she's already done it before. Secondly, everything adds up. If it says she hasn't been employed since July and she's leaving your house dolled up for "WORK" that doesn't exist, it's obviously for something else.
When a couple is in a trusting marriage and if she wasn't doing anything wrong, she wouldn't be upset if you got on the computer.. and she wouldn't mind leaving her phone around you. There would be nothing for her to hide, but obviously she's hiding something.
Why are you paying for everything if she has a "JOB". Stop paying for things so that she can get her no-good, lying, cheating, lazy behind working again.
I hate to say it but I have no doubt that she's cheating and would suggest that you get out of this marriage because she hasn't kept her promise to you, that it wouldn't happen again.

Answer 3

Dude you have problems. The only help i can give you is this:; "I don't want to say leave the ***** because that may seem the easiest thing to do but you have to confront her."

Both of you have trust issues for one thing because you're going through her phone, running her credit report and other things. On the other hand she...........well she has issues and it is not the fact that she thinks you don't love her.

You both need serious counseling whether or not she is having an affair. Your marriage is not going to work out otherwise.

Answer 4

Sounds like a very strong possibility. I am a believer in going with the gut instinct. I just want to say, that no matter what she cklaimed her reason was for cheating the first time, it isn't ur fault. Thats unfair and selfish. She made a commitment to you, and it was her choic to go outside of the marriage, which will in no way fix or help with the issues w/n the marriage. She made a selfish choice, and instead of comming to yu and trying to fix things she went to him. Not ur fault at all. she sounds like she is hiding a lot of things and you need to ask yourself if you want to live like that. YOu sound like you deserve better. The marriage won't get fixed unless she and you work on it together, and it takes 2 for things to go wrong, it's not just one persons fault, however she isn't making things forgivable or fixable by lying, hiding, or cheating. I'v been in this boat, and I got out. It was the best thing I ever did cause I didn't deserve the lies, or decete and he tried to blame me for his bad actions. Like him, she has and had a choice, and sounds like she willingly is making the wrong ones. Trust is not there and w/o that, you don't have a marriage. Don't ignore the red flags, you only live once, and life is to short to live it with someone who doesn't cherrish you. Good luck, I hope happiness for you, its out there. Do't let someone treat you like this, they aren't worth it.

Answer 5

In a word - yes.
Let's see what you list.
She's not working, but telling you she is, so she doesn't have to account for the time she's not there.
She's spending money she tells you she doesn't have, and she's not using it to pay bills.
She's paranoid about her phone.
Your not having sex, but it smells like she is.

If you already know all this why do you ask us if she's cheating? Does it have to be written on a billboard 10' high?
If you want definite proof (which you already have) get a private invistigator onto her.

Answer 6

her excuse for cheating is so lame, and has she expressed any remorse. if she is hiding her cell like my ex hid his its a definite sign that she is trying to hide something, don't wait until she decides to leave, and cleans out the account, or runs up your credit, act on it now, if u feel something is wrong than it is as our intuition never lies. it will do no good to confront a liar, u will never get honesty from her, and when she is ready to leave she will be gone, she is just staying long enough to get all she can off of u.

Answer 7

So go toher "Work" and suprise her with flowers ........

That should spark a conversation or confirm if she's working or not.

You could suprise her between her classes with a flower and a invitation to lunch or dinner........

If you pay the phone bills you can always get the text numbers and text as long as you pay on the account and are primary.

Or you could just talk to her .....


Any way ya go ....Good Luck !

Answer 8

ok im sorry to be so straight about this but, if she cheated before, why are you still with her? why do people put up with this? its not fair to yourself! if shes sharing herself with someone else, then she cant possibly be giving her whole heart and body to you. thats suck a mockery of marriage. you need to be with someone who is equally devoted to you and it doesnt sound like thats what you are getting. i am so sorry for you. i know how it feels, my first relationship went this way. it ended very violently, im not saying at all that yours should, im just saying i did what i had to do and it ended and now im with a man who is the very best in the world, we have 3 beautiful children and it couldnt be better, but we are devoted to each other, no games, we dont share our "candy". anyway, i wish you the very best and hope things go well for you. good luck and God bless

Answer 9

Well, it doesn't sound like she is cheating. BUT...it does sound like she either has a drug problem or a gambling problem. I mean why would she be withdrawing so much money just because she was cheating? Well, other than the text messages it doesn't sound like she cheating, not to me anyway. Yep, drugs or gambling, I've seen this before.

Answer 10

Boy you got a problem.
Your wife definitely is doing something behind your back.
You need to have a talk with your wife confront her with your evidence and demand that she explains her self. If she is cheating she will tell you at that meeting. If she is cheating on you she might not want to be married with you anymore. I would cut her loose now before it is too late. She is living it up at your expense.

Answer 11

Hire a private investigator and have her investigated. It will be well worth the cost to find out the truth, since she is such a liar, which you know already.

God gives adultery as the one reason for divorce.