Are you a loner or other?

Question

{not to be taken literally kk? it just came to me *^_^*}

I Roam Alone


You don’t have to always be
the one who watches over me
Just walk away, move onward now,
don’t need your friendship anyhow

Oh, please don’t start crying
it won’t do you any good,
wipe you eyes and recognize
a loner of this world

I roam in light and live in dark
prepared for any thing
What makes you want to offer
any hope you think you’ll bring?

Opinions just get in the way
I don’t care what you do
Mostly I just ignore the words
you think can help me through

Go find yourself another cad
to do your bidding on
Don’t turn around just one last time
to look cause I’ll be gone

I am but, a passer by
who lives within herself
The only flaw is that I draw
attention to myself

What ever vibe you picked up on
you must have been mistaken
Keep moving on, I roam alone
and will not be overtaken

LOL, Ronnie, I didn't even notice my friend (oops) I started out with the first then added later as I was in a place with nothing to write on LOL, guess it goes to show the more natural verse eh? *^_^*

Answer 1

Pretty good. Did you mean to have a different rhyme scheme in the first stanza?

Answer 2

Nice. Only two things. 1. get rid of the word just in line 15. It throws off the meter. 2. Like Ronnie said, did you mean to change the meter in stanza 1. It seems a little weird unless done for a reason. Oh, and maybe change cause to since in the 5th stanza. Other than those few minor things, I think it's great. I'd love to see another draft of this to read what you come up with. :]

Answer 3

Lovely poem, and to answer the question, I am an other. I hate to be alone, unless I have a good book of poetry, then when I finish reading, I wish I had someone to cuddle with. Maybe someday I will meet the man I won't be able to resist, and he'll sweep me off my feet and into the sunset.

Answer 4

Beautiful

Answer 5

I like this poem
although I almost took it literally
because I can be both
From what I am reading
there is alot of loner
and some bitterness like
I don't care, don't cry
wipe your eyes from the tears.

Answer 6

I like it....I actually envisioned a person walking down the street alone while reading this poem trying to get someone to leave you alone. I like it. Could you paint a little more imagery though? I want to SEE more.

Answer 7

Shad this is one terrific poem' and it sounds like i feel at times.I;m a loner some times as i got tired of getting FUC#%D WITHOUT GETTING KISSED. I have met great friends on here but i have learned from experience that when life gets tough my so called friends disappeared like ghosts in the wind, i have met really great people here that always have an ear to hear me anytime. keep your writing as you are one of top poets ever,and i love all your work... Thanks for always Sharing

Answer 8

The Lone Ranger and Tonto have been vacationing around the super Plains , whilst swiftly Tonto jumps down from the back of Silver, runs forward some ft, lays down and places his ear to the floor....after a 2nd or 2 Tonto jumps to his ft and says to Lone Ranger,... " Lone Ranger !..... Buffalo come !!", The Lone Ranger seems at Tonto and says "Wow ! that's spectacular !! ".."How do you recognize ?!", Tonto replies whilst wiping his cheek... "Sticky face "!.....

Answer 9

You are the artist which has painted a very vivid mental picture. You have framed it and have let it hang on the very walls of every imagination that reads it. Bravo!!

Answer 10

Beautiful words by a beautiful lady. Well done.