I love my boyfriend with all of my heart!! I found out he cheated on me with his ex 7 months ago!! I'm still hurt, she calls him still, how do I forgive him?? I know he's the one I love, I don't want to lose him because I can't trust him.
2007-10-28 04:07:08 · 29 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
I believe that sometimes if they just cheat once and get away with it...they'll do it again. Unless they truly love you...then that's a different story. There are always better men out there...and sometimes you just have to take the risk and give up on this guy. It's not an easy thing to do...but i think it's better to sit down with him and ask him (of course he could lie), but tell him how you really feel...that you really do love him but if he continues to show disloyalty then you're just going to have to end the relationship. But tell him how much he means to you...(do NOT give in to his babytalk if he's trying to talk his way out of it)
2007-10-28 04:11:52 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
My husband and I went through a similar ordeal, only exception is it wasn't with an ex. I simply asked myself what was more important. Fixing our problems and making our marriage work or give in and be another statistic.
We talked ALOT about our feelings, emotions and we understood each other.
If you truely love him and want to be with him then you'll find it in yourself to forgive. But once you forgive you need to let it go. People make mistakes and we're all human.
As for her still calling him. That should be a huge No NO. I would make it very clear that it's either her or you. He can't have both. If he can't accept that it makes you uncomfortable then you should show him where the door is.
2007-10-28 11:16:23 · answer #2 · answered by BeLLa 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Trust is the basis of any relationship. If you don't have that there's not much else. Does he take her phone calls? Does he still see her? If yes, it does not seem like he is making much of an effort to make things right between the 2 of you.
For me, once a cheater, always a cheater.
2007-10-28 11:14:18 · answer #3 · answered by OCMama 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he cheated once he will do it again. Forgiving is easier than forgetting!!!! Remember this and go from there maybe u should just move on especially if she is still in the picture. I know that would be hard to do but maybe best for u in the long term. Life is full of unexplained and hard things. Think of yourself in this matter not of him or of your love for him. ou have to look at the whole picture. And you are the most important one in it. Good luck and may God Bless
2007-10-28 11:16:35 · answer #4 · answered by Special Edition 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
For most guys, the rule of thumb is "... if you are not married, play ball!". Many still do that after marriage, but that's not the issue here. If you are truly in a serious relationship, you will have to address his real commitment to you and both of you need to talk about your expectations for the relationship. The younger you are (say teenagers), the less mature and the chances of staying together is slim, unless you are a very rare love relationship. Good luck!
2007-10-28 11:24:33 · answer #5 · answered by carmelcavalier 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Once a Cheater Always a Cheater. Leave him and find happiness with someone that will love you and only you! if you stay with him than you will suffer and be un-happy for probably ever. but if yall can work it out all the more props to you. I personally would dump him but different strokes for different folks. Take care and good luck!
2007-10-28 11:13:35 · answer #6 · answered by babyphat_liu 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You might not lose him, but you'll never forget his cheating. Take this from a former cheater. I tried to make it right with the girl I cheated on, and she turned around and did it to me worse. You can forgive, but it's almost impossible to forget.
2007-10-28 11:11:55 · answer #7 · answered by Eric 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
ending a relationship with someone you love is one of the most difficult things you can do...but as bad as that is...its nothing compared to wasting many more months or years with someone whom you cant trust. You will always be suspicious and it will probably destroy the releationship anyway. If you had been married for a few yeatrs and had children..I would advise to try and work it out..but in your situation, I would advise to take the pain now and find someone you can love and TRUST.
2007-10-28 11:19:48 · answer #8 · answered by Cubsfan 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It takes a long time to establish this type of trust, and only a moment to lose it. Trust him slowly once again. Will he cheat on you, he might, but if he values what he almost lost, he won't. You know him better than any of us, so you must make up your own mind.
2007-10-28 11:12:16 · answer #9 · answered by Beau R 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
coming from someone with experience... my father cheated on my mother, then walked out on us when i was 7. He then married the woman, and then he cheated on her with two other women at the same time. He is now married for the 3rd time and i havn't spoken to him in over a year. Be careful with forgiveness
2007-10-28 11:11:05 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋