Are they scared of the indipendence of a liberated modern man ?
2007-10-28 03:51:43 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Gender Studies
ashj so you dont trust your bf and you want him to marry you, because you dont trust him. Nice.
2007-10-28 06:31:12 · update #1
Not likely...they are scared of the fact that the man does not ever want to commit to them and that man is constantly going to be in the position where they can flee at any time with little or no strings attached. Can you honestly say to me that you would be perfectly content knowing the person you love and share a life with does not feel as though they love you enough to commit in a marriage? It strikes me as a way of saying...I want it all and I want to put forth the least amount of effort possible. There is something to be said for saying "I love you and want to commit to a life, of ups and downs, with you. I know that we can make something last and I want to honor that commitment by being legally married to you." On the other hand, you have someone saying, I am going to be Mr. Independent, I can take off whenever I want, I can have everything separate from you (health insurance, name, personal affects, will) and that way, whenever I want to, I can take off. Sure, there are women out there who this works for, but most people I know want to have something a little more stable and sure than that. They want someone who can turn off their "liberated modern man" personna (their macho, do-what-I-want-ego) and actually be vulnerable to a marriage and working through life together.
2007-10-28 04:03:47 · answer #1 · answered by Jules, E, and Liam :) 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Not all women are. Cohabitation is very common in Europe. However, in America marriage is still the ideal, the happily ever after (even though divorce rates are high, it's still the belief), and I think women worry about being left behind. An inability to commit is perceived when a man doesn't want to marry and that quality is one women try to avoid.
2007-10-28 04:11:04 · answer #2 · answered by Maverick 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
No, they realise that unwillingness to commit to marriage but no problem with cohabiting is basically meeting his sexual needs for the time being - play-acting at being married without the responsibilities - and a temporary thing. If he really wanted this woman to be with him for the long haul, exclusively together, he would want her to sign on the dotted line with him. Not wanting that is telling her this is an ad hoc arrangement. No woman wants to be second best, or be effectively told 'you'll do for the moment'.
2007-10-28 04:24:11 · answer #3 · answered by bluebell 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Why should she trust you to stick around if you just want to cohabitate? Sure, some women want that freedom too, that way they can leave when they get tired of you too. But for a woman looking for a permanent relationship, this is an alarm bell. She knows that really you just want to keep your options open.
2007-10-28 06:32:18 · answer #4 · answered by rohak1212 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
probably because in this day and age, cohabitation is no different than dating.
2007-10-28 06:16:25 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋