Any comments on an ekphrasis of "Water Lilies"?

Question

Would love to read any comments people have; no need for false praise, as I have a thick skin regarding my admittedly amateur poetry. For more explanation on ekphrastic poetry, see this link to a lonely question:

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20071025090717AAZsnRx&r=w

Viewing "Water Lilies"

Quick glances find canvas
spread with serenity,
a soothing glimpse of
undisturbed pond.
Look again:
closer looks show
points of color
bursting, a
pondscape teeming -
proletariat minutiae
quietly rebelling as the
whole struggles to quell
microcosmic uprisings.

Annabella: Thank you! I did not set out for it to be Marxist, but it evolved that way as I redrafted. As for the Monet(s), I thought it would be an interesting subject since those paintings are ubiquitous, but tend not to be in places that encourage closer examination.

Answer 1

I like it, it reads very well. Is it a Marxist interpretation of Monet??? (proletariat minutiae? class struggle in the pond?). I am not very fond of that painting (those paintings, rather. Maybe seen too often and everywhere) but your poem offers new perspectives.