My husband is an only child and his parents were older when they had him. He tends to act like 20 or 30 years older than his age. It seems to me as if he wants to relive the life that he had as a kid, because some of the things that his parents used to do he wants to use it in our marriage.
For instance they would get up early on a Saturday morning, get dressed, get in the car and drive -- without a destination. Wherever they ended up, they ended up. He said if they decided to get a hotel room and spend the night they would, otherwise they would turn around and come back home.
He has done this on several occasions with me and it didn't make sense to me. He asked me to get dressed and then we just got on the highway and drove for miles and miles. He stopped in the towns and there were nothing but cows, dirt and grass. What's exciting about that? Gas is too high to just get in the car and drive aimlessly.
Do you and your spouse do this? Do you think it's normal?
2007-10-26 13:39:30 · 17 answers · asked by Hoping he will bless me with #1 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I am 30 and he is 29. We have been married for a little over 3 years and we don't have any kids. He is frustrated with me because he says he is very simple and the simple things that he likes to do I have no interest in. The thing is, I don't have to do anything extravagant. But I am not simple-minded either.
2007-10-26 13:41:50 · update #1
Boy do I understand where you are coming from, our husbands are lookers, not do-ers. On several occassions my husband has driven us off to far off places full of trees, bugs and little rivers.... to sit.... and sit.... and sit..... and occassionally remark on how romantic the situation is....
I don't understand the appeal of sitting in new places, or trying new little restaurants in wierd little towns but he finds the whole thing charming and thinks with his whole heart that I should too. I go, and sometimes I do find myself having fun... we make it fun because we are together, but again sometimes I am just annoyed and I want to go home. I don't think it's normal exactly but they are just lookig to explore.
2007-10-26 13:54:02 · answer #1 · answered by Christian F 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
What he is doing is showing you that no matter how complicated life can be, he will remain easy going and easy to get along with. The drives are a form of bonding, even though there are cows and grass he is reaching out to you to see if you can appreciate the simple side of life.It`s also a great way to communicate when there is no destination,it`s whatever way the wind may blow. My wife and I used to drive around the same way, stop for a french fry, just chill and be together.
You`ve got your self a good man there.
2007-10-26 20:48:51 · answer #2 · answered by I tell it like it is 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I agree that you should be happy that your husband wants to go on these outings with you. You have the opportunity to get in a car and go somewhere...any where you want to go that catches your eye. And it can be so calming when you aren't on a time schedule and don't have to rush everywhere.
I did this on my own when I was unemployed. I would just jump in the car and start driving. When I saw signs for something that caught my eye, I would drive there, or I would stop there. I got to see a lot of things I wouldn't have had the chance to see or would have actually thought of driving to. I do think it's normal and you should have fun with your husband.
2007-10-26 21:15:52 · answer #3 · answered by torn 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try being interested even though initially you will be pretending. You can eventually have fun as well. I am now a football fun b'cos he is. I've also made him a movie fun b'cos after the 90 grueling minutes of cheering his team 'unwillingly' i slot in a movie. Hand go, hand come' as they say. But seriously spice it up by finding interesting site along the way or choose a destination that you can also enjoy. Well, make the best of what you have, you can also lure him into liking what you like.
All the best love
2007-10-26 20:57:40 · answer #4 · answered by sweet-innocence 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
His ideas sounds crazy but in a good way. Why wouldn't you want to spend some time with your husband? Here he is getting up and taking you out, yes the destination is unknown and sometimes you go to out of the way places but you are with your husband? Spending time talking in the car, being with each other. I can imagine that there are wives out there that would kill to have their man spend time with them and not his golf buddies.
It seems like you would rather stay home sometimes. Talk to your husband about this. Maybe come to some sort of compromise. I'm sure spending time home, talking would be nice also. Hopefully he will listen to your needs.
2007-10-26 22:44:12 · answer #5 · answered by Jay 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Actually my husband and I do this. We have some of the greatest conversations in the car. Yes, gas is expensive but we plan for that. I would rather go see nothing in a small town than see the same old same old in my home town.
2007-10-26 20:46:38 · answer #6 · answered by Poppet 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your lucky. I wish my man was like that. I use to have a bestfriend and we did that all the time it was great. Now i have a baby and my hubby don't even like simple. I love stuff like that. My hubby he likes tv so be thankful you got a man that is like that cuz allot of good can come from that plus when you do have kids your going to wish you was on that hwy sometimes lol i love my son but sometimes i just want to drive and get lost like the old days
2007-10-26 20:59:23 · answer #7 · answered by JennyP 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would consider him spontaneous. He sounds great. I love to travel and my husband doesn't. I think some people just have a need to escape. Try to loosen up a bit. It is probably a stress reliever for him.
2007-10-27 01:12:05 · answer #8 · answered by Jenn 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i'd call it spontaneous and a good way to see the area and relax. who cares what there is to look at. at least you aren't looking at the inside of your house all weekend. if just looking at cows is boring to you, check out the map and find somewhere you'd like to go. point him in that direction. think of this as an adventure./ who knows, you may find someplace and fall in love with it.
2007-10-26 20:55:30 · answer #9 · answered by racer 51 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is not trying to relive his childhood, he is just trying to carry on a tradition with you. It is something he enjoyed doing while growing up, and wants to continue doing with his family. Where is the harm in that? I am sure your family has some traditions that you have brought to the marriage....
2007-10-26 20:49:27 · answer #10 · answered by Roman Esteban Due April 12 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋