my wife says i need to give her more space, we dont live together anymore she is staying with a friend of hers we in my opinion barely talk, about 3 hours a week, but she says she wants more space. what am i to do?
2007-10-26 11:19:43 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Pretend like she dropped off the face of the Earth and start operating like you are going on with your life without her.
I bet THAT gets her attention!
If she doesn't come back...the worst thing that can happen is, you'll already be on your way to healing, and moving toward the life you deserve and perhaps someone that actually WANTS to be right by you!
2007-10-26 11:24:51 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 2⤋
It depends on WHAT " you " want.
If you really love her - - and you really want her back ... then do what she says ... give her LOTS of space.
Have you ever heard the saying ... "absence makes the heart grow fonder" ??
For some reason that only she may know - she needs this space. Give it to her ... or she may take it .. and take it further than you really want.
It might be wise to just completely 'back-off'. This may puzzle her somewhat. But you will be giving her space. It may not be easy for you to do .. but it is the best thing you could do for your situation with her.
If she eventually misses you ,, and loves you .. she will come back to .. refreshed & renewed. She may really need the space .. which seems evident since she lives somewhere else instead of with you.
Give her 100% space.
Let her do ALL of the contacting you. You kinda leave her alone .. no contact .. thus, is giving her space. She may feel smothered. Been there, done that ... and it is not a good place to be in .. or to feel.
Put something else in your life to keep your mind occupied while she is gone.
Do 2 things.
Listen to what she tells you she wants.
Let her actions, speak louder than her words. Her actions, is what she wants to do.
If you don't give her tons of space .. the end result could become worse than it is now.
This is your decision. The decisions we make, determines our lives.
2007-10-26 18:45:28 · answer #2 · answered by Tara 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just give her the space & apparently you know why your wife is not there with you, just leave her alone and go on what you normally do unless its fussing or beating someone but just live life dude and if she loves you and wants to be with you she will be back but if not then let it go cause you dont want to force someone to be with you and be hated do you, just let it ride dude and wait for her to call you, and calm down.
2007-10-26 18:49:13 · answer #3 · answered by dugbug63 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
either agree to get couples counseling or ask for a divorce. tell her that you refuse to stay in limbo. let her know that you would prefer to stay married, but that time apart will only help you both adjust to life apart. be very clear that you love her and want to be with her as a married couple, but be equally clear in stating that you will not continue to live this way. let her know the ball is in her court and that you look forward to hearing her decision within a week. if she agrees to move back in and go to counseling, then give it a go.
2007-10-26 19:23:34 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you should give her exactly what she wants more space, more than she maybe asking for...you have to think about you b/c it's ovious she's not. If you can't talk to her and find out what it is you need to do to make her happy other than space. you should let her go, maybe she's finding herself needing space from you b/c someone else is making her happy. Just a thought
2007-10-26 18:29:49 · answer #5 · answered by puffy2step 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
"Leaving Traces" nailed it. Heed their advice & go on about your business as if she doesn't exist. If she "checks in", do not yeild. Just tell her that "she wanted space, so space she gets" and leave it at that and be off with you. Like "Leaving Traces" says if nothing happens than you're on your way to healing and a new life. Good Luck!
2007-10-26 18:29:20 · answer #6 · answered by Add Man 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go talk to an attorney and file for divorce before she takes YOU to the cleaners son.
Protect yourself and then dont talk to her let HER contact YOU .Tell her you are divorcing her as soon as you get the papers drawn up.
If she loves you at ALL she will want to work things out if not then she just didnt have the nerve to divorce you.
2007-10-26 18:28:16 · answer #7 · answered by Joe F 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Okay! Sounds to me she made her mind up already... You never caught up to it yet.
She wants space for a reason. Ask her why? She may/may not tell you. You have a big decision to make. you need to make it now.
If she won't talk to you, than let the Lawyer do all your talking.
that should be plenty of Space she needs... right!!!!!
2007-10-26 18:34:14 · answer #8 · answered by Petunia 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That depends on you. If you love her and want it to work, give her some time. If you feel you can't sit around and wait for her to figure out what she wants, then file for divorce.
My vote is to give it a little more time. And try to get her to open up to you as to what is going on with her. There is more to this than meets the eye.
2007-10-26 18:25:17 · answer #9 · answered by nurse ratchet 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Dude, sorry to say but that is just an excuse she is using and she is just trying to soften the blow of telling you that she doesn't want to be with you anymore. I hate to be brutally honest but maybe that is what you need to find out. Don't waste time wondering if she is going to come back, ask her if she really wants to be with you and save yourself time and heartache. Good Luck!!!
2007-10-26 18:27:31 · answer #10 · answered by !~!~Edward~!~! 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋