How to Write a Lil' Wayne Verse in 10 Easy Steps?

Question

1. Pick a Verb. Preferably a verb about running away from the law or from an assailant. I.E. Duck, Run, Dodge or maybe Stop, Drop or Roll. L'il Wayne LOVES stopping, dropping and rolling. Not that there's anything wrong with that.

2. Connnect the verb to some sort of simile. This is crucial. Every single L'il Wayne line must contain some sort of relatively obvious simile. So maybe you can "duck like Scrooge." "Run like a bloody nose." Or even "Dodge like Kansas." You can do metaphors but try to steer away from doing this too often, lest people think that you are a different ghost-writer. That is bad. Also for bonus points talk about how "sweet" you are. Lil' Wayne loves talking about being sweet like a Tahitian Treat or some other delicacy high in sucrose.

3. Mention "Slanging Keys." This is crucial to establish street cred. Don't pay attention to the fact that L'il Wayne's been famous since 12 and the only thing he knows about slangin' is that he speaks with it. After all, if you don't talk drugs how else can you impress the translucent Dairy Queen-white music critics. This way they can also compare you to the Wire. (Just remember to connect all that "slanging keys" talk with a simile).

4. Declare that you are Weezy F. Baby. This will tell listeners who you are. Sure, they probably already know, but adding The "F" in the middle of the name uncertainly adds to Wayne's level of class. It makes him seem like F. Scott Fitzgerald. Exactly like F. Scott Fitzgerald. Whatever you do, don't attempt to ascertain what the "F" stands for. That my friends is a slippery slope. And whatever you do, don't think about what the "F" stands for while looking at a picture of Wayne and Baby making out.

5. Talk about hustling. Music critics love hustling. Presumably, they are devotees to the energetic style of basketball popularized by players like Ben Wallace, Kurt Rambis and Mark Madsen. This will make them feel at home. If there's anything music writers know about, it's hustling.

6. Talk about Baby. Call him your Daddy. Forget the fact that he's not actually your Daddy. Forget the fact that the majority of people that call other men "daddy" are prostitutes. It's unimportant. Mention something that Baby told you. Maybe that he told you that "these is ." Or that he told you to "Turn around and stick out." (Maybe, he was just quoting Sir-Mix-A-Lot.) Ignore the fact that you call a man named "Baby," "Daddy." Let's just chalk that up to being a New Orleans thing.

7. Make some sort of obvious pop culture technology reference. Talk about IPods. Or Myspace. Or gigabytes. Something remotely technological. It will show that Wayne is not completely retarded (just partially) and might have actually read a newspaper once or twice. Which clearly means he is a genius.

8. Talk about how poorly you treat women. Perhaps you can claim how you'll "never love a ***** ." Or how you'll "never give a ho a damn thing." The more misogynistic the better. This will definitely do much to steer people away from those nasty "gay" rumors.

9. Apropos to nothing, make some sort of remark about Hurricane Katrina. No need to bother making it have anything to do with the rest of the verse. After all, never underestimate white liberal guilt. Any sort of name-dropping will make white liberals feel bad and they will forget the fact that Wayne is a multi-millionaire and anoint him the voice of the people. Also, be sure to make wild ridiculous conspiracy theories like claiming that you heard George Bush blew up the levees. The more absurd the better. Go for it.

10. Proclaim yourself the "Greatest Rapper Alive."Forget the Fact that Wayne would be lucky to be included in a list of the Top 20 rappers working right now. Most music critics haven't listened to Hip Hop Made Before 1999 anyway (other than Public Enemy). If you proclaim yourself the greatest, you will be the greatest. Or at least people will be foolish enough to buy this canard.

Does anyone else find this hilarious and true?

No I didn't make this up. I found it online.

Answer 1

Check it
Weezy F. Baby, the best rapper alive
I'm so clean, like my shoes, I am Tide/tied
Up in the system, damn you just missed him
Money over b!tch3s is my wisdom
Always gettin to the money whether it's this or crack
Like an iPod, I will skip your track
I'm the Birdman Jr., I might have to school ya
Like my daddy did, his Johnson's longer than a ruler

Answer 2

This Site Might Help You.

RE:
How to Write a Lil' Wayne Verse in 10 Easy Steps?
1. Pick a Verb. Preferably a verb about running away from the law or from an assailant. I.E. Duck, Run, Dodge or maybe Stop, Drop or Roll. L'il Wayne LOVES stopping, dropping and rolling. Not that there's anything wrong with that.

2. Connnect the verb to some sort of simile. This is...

Answer 3

You could say the samething about TI call yourself the KING and make the world believe you when you say it a million times then make a cd where your alter ego battles and make all the songs sound the same

AND 6 NO BABY IS NOT HIS BIOLOGICAL DAD BUT HE ADOPTED HIM AT 12 AND MORE OR LESS RAISED SO WHAT WOULD BABY BE TO YOU

Answer 4

Oh wooooow...thanks for the tip hun!! My album just went triple platinum. Great tips, it inspired me to write awesome music. Hmmm....I think I owe you a dinner or somthing.

Answer 5

I found it hilarious and true but

WEEZY F. BABY IS MY BABY'S DADDY!

you have way too much time girl....if you were smart you would be making money using this formula like he does....guess that does make him something like a genius.

My fave line rap is:
I Know U See Da Gwop Cause Gettin Money Is Wut We On
Ridin Drop Top In Da Winter Wit Da Heat On
Bad Yellow ***** Keep My Passenger Seat Warm
Leg Hangin Out Da Window, U Aint Got These On
***** Holla, It Is Lil Weezy
They Can Not See Me, They Are Like Stevie
I Am Barring-a-ton like Levy
I Circle Ya House Like Bee-Bee
Colder Dan Da He-Be-Gee-Bees
Neva Give Free Bees, 75 Thousand For Deez Fees
**** I Can Get A 100 Thousand Up In Deez Jeans
Big Stacks My Pockets On Creatine
Young Money, Dipset ***** We A Team
If U Dont Like It ***** F**k U No Vaseline
Errrrr, Peel Off In Da Lambergine
Like A Tangerine
Got Da Industry Shakin Like A Tamborine
Like A ***** Wit Some Lips Like Angeli-na Jolie
Holy God Flow I Go Where No Other Guy Go
F**k You Hoe Im So 5-0-4
I Hope Every Snitch Die Slow
Hip-Hop Dats My Hoe I Know, She Know I Like It Wet
Dont Want No Dry Hoe
Alright *****, I Am thee Boy No Decoy And I Will Straight Up Destroy
Any Boy or Man And I Prefer Money than Bitches Are Just Need For
We Are Young Money Bitches And I Am tha Lea-der
We Are Currency, Mack Maine, And D Raw and I Just Signed
A Chick Named Nikki Minaj
And Me Im Still Spitten Like A Retard
And Deez ****** Soft Dey Should Be Rappin In Leotards
***** We In Charge, Baby Put Me In Charge
And Im Just Murderin ****** Free Of Charge
Ya Digg Just Holla Back I See Ya Sarge
And Im So Motherf**kin High I Could Eat A Star
[Upgrade U Freestyle lyrics on http://www.metrolyrics.com]

Yeah Let Me Upgrade U
U May Not Be A Model, But I Can Front Page Ya
U Know Im Nasty Excuse My Behavior
Let Me Just Taste Ya
We Can F**k Lata
Sittin In Da Coupe, Lookin Like A Racer
Top Peeled Back Like Da Skin Of A Potato
Seat Way Back Listen To Anita Baker
Ridin By Myself Smokin Weed By Da Acre
Hollygrove Gata Aint Nobody Greater
Leave U Wit Some Bullet Holes Da Size Of Craters
U Aint Heard Da Latest
Weezy F. Da Greatest
Battle Anybody, ***** F**k away ya Favorite
Its A New Game And Im Da Coach Like Avery
Leave It To Da Flow, We Gettin Dough Like A Bakery
I Dont Really Want To But Deez ****** Makin Me
Put A Muthaf**ker On Ice Like Da Maple Leaves
Dats A Hockey Team And I Aint On No Hockey Team
But Im A Champion, Wheres Da F**king Rocky Theme?
Damn, Rest In Peace Apollo Creed
Imma Monster Everyday Is Halloween
Alot Of Syrup, Alot Of Pills, And A Lot Of Weed
And I Keep My Pockets Green Like A Pod Of Peas
And If U Hatin Baby U Can Get A Side Of Deez
Deez Nuts in ya Mouth Can U Swallow Please
Haha, Yeah Im So Hot I Freeze
Big Balls And Dey Jangle Like Alot Of Keys
Even Deaf Bitches Say Hi To Me
She Tell a Blind Bitches She Say I Gotta See
Young Carter Darlin
Understand, I Am Micheal Jordan Ballin
Yes, Imma Dog Imma Hoya Ya Homie
Imma Boss, Ya Man Is Juss An Employer Mami
Let Me Upgrade U, Let Me Up-Grade U, Upgrade U
Ahhhhhhhhh……………….WEEZY!!

Answer 6

1

Answer 7

That's great and funny, but you forgot a couple ecential steps to a wayne song.
11. Talk about pussy. Make a lyric where you get your sexual thoughts out, while at the same time dissing another rapper.
"You n****s smell like pussy, so let me stick my dick in."
12. say the N word multiple times in a sentence. Forget the fact that it might not make sence or that n**ga doesn't rhyme with n**ga, just go for it.
"Call me weezy F n**ga. I got a big dick n**ga. N**ga I'm a beast n**ga, realest n**ga in the game n**ga. N**ga I'd roast these n**gas n**ga, eat em up like food n**ga. Pussy a*s n**ga I'm the hottest n**ga, I be gettin pussy n**ga you pussy n**gas."
13. Rap about drugs, guns, and killing cops.

Also, I disagree with the weezy f baby part. Say what the f is for.
"weezy f baby, and the f is for phanominal."
Forget the fact that there's no f in phanominal, say it anyway.

Answer 8

I do. I thought I was the only one that didnt believe Weezy F Baby. He just joined the Bloods as an adult. How cool.

Answer 9

lol....#4 was the funniest

not takin nothin away from him, but alot of this is true

Evie: the asker didnt do this, this was off the internet some where, I've read it before...it doesnt take too much time to copy & paste somethin

Answer 10

Wow thats really good...did you get this from somewhere or is this all you??? If this is all you...Im giving you sick prop...love it...