I'm smart, but I wish I wasn't?

Question

I can't even explain the frustration of being smart. I don't like how my brain is able to comprehend and soak up information like a sponge. I don't understand how I can remember every single thing I have ever learned and never forget, while most people have the opposite problem. Intellectually I have never been challenged in any area of my life. Its frustrating, everything in life is so boring, so mundane. In college I expected to find people like myself, with extreme intelligence. And I haven't. People notice when you're a freshman taking senior level courses and your doing better than everyone in the course (especially if the professor announces it), the attention is awful and I feel that everyone secretly despises me, but I'm not going to lower my grades just to ruin my future. I don't like how I hear people whispering about me, pointing at me saying, "look there's that smart girl".

I don't like how I hear people whispering about me, pointing at me saying, "look there's that smart girl". I don't like the attention and being smarter limits your friends since a lot of people don't like to be around people that are so much smarter than them. Overall I'm happy with my life but I feel so...alone.

I know this might seem weird since many people wish they had all the intelligence in the world. I don't know what to do in life. I don't want to use my intelligence to gain wealth, or social status, or attention of any kind. Sure I could use my intelligence to find a cure for cancer, solve the problem of world hunger, or some other wonderful world changing thing, but I don't want to. I just want to be normal, get married, and have kids. But its hard to find someone to be in a relationship with. I'm wondering am I the only one who feels this way? What can I do about this? Or do I just sound plain weird?

I figured people would assume I'm egotistical.

I wish people would just understand how sincere I am about finding an answer to this problem. This truely has me depressed at times..., maybe I should just talk to a psychiatrist of something since, apparently, I won't find an answer here.

I don't know why people jump to mentioning IQ scores, I've never mentioned mine. Actually I refuse to take an IQ test since I don't believe in numbers defining my intelligence. I think my great long term memory actually has to do with my horrible short term memory. I've taught myself to channel most information into my long term memory since I can not rely on anything stored short term.

Answer 1

What you are describing is not about intellect but about emotions and "spirituality", for lack of a better word. Intellectuals frequently suffer from ennui. It's one thing to have a fancy sports car with an engine that purrs like liquid platinum. It's another thing to have a journey to drive it on. You seek that journey. If I were you, young and just beginning adulthood, I would shuck the world for two years and go pack-packing on a walk-about in Mongolia. The lands and people there are worth the journey. And, when I came back, I would then have rocket-fuel in the my fancy sports car. : )

Answer 2

That is pretty normal type frustration for extremely intelligent people. I think part or most of it comes from the expectations other people feel you should meet. I went to college for two years and dropped out because I was bored and couldn't decide what I wanted to do. I had been in gifted and talented programs and advanced classes from the beginning. I always felt different from my friends, like there was some kind of inside secret I didn't know about. I even got picked on for being smart and making better grades than my peers.
All of that stuff really sucked, and made me hate school to boot. I will be 30 next month. I feel like my intelligence has probably got me out of more bad situations than anything else. I don't seem to have as amny of those "what do I do " moments like other people have because I have been able to come up with solutions to my problems. I have also been maried and divorced. If and when you paln on getting married make sure your prospective husband is on the same level you are when it comes to intelligence. My marriage failed because my ex and I could not communicate well, she didn't grasp concepts as quickly as I did if she even grasped them at all.
Without going into too much detail about relationships, realize that being smart is a gift. I remeber everything too, what I read, where I put things, useful facts, useless facts, peoples names who I had met only once years ago, etc, etc. Some people are gifted in other ways. Some people are very athletic, some are very attractive. A few people posess all of those things. I really caught a lot of crap because I am not what you would expect (stereotypically) a "smart" person to look like. I'm 6'5", 270 lbs. and pretty stoutly built. I get treated like a "dumb jock"(not to offend anyone, you know what I mean) until I open my mouth to speak. Just do what you do to the best of your ability. If that happens to be better than what most other people can do that's ok. I promise when you have kids you will never wish you were less intelligent. It really just sounds like you don't want the attention you get for being intelligent. I just learned to play it off the best I can and carry on with the important stuff now. Things like, I wish my 4yr old son wouldn't pirate my tools to disassemble things in my house.

Answer 3

It probably would be a good idea to see a counselor -- your school probably has free services for students.

When you're out of school, the stuff you're talking about will mostly go away.

You could consider joining Mensa (though you'd have to take an IQ test).

Expecting everyone at college to be as smart as you was unrealistic.

For intellectual challenge, do more, and more difficult reading.

You're at a time of life when most people feel aleinated for one reason or another. As you get older, that will get better.

Being smart is hecka cool. (I'm not as smart as you, I gather.) Being able to understand things is a good thing. Since you've spent your whole life in school, you may not realize how applicable what you learn can be.

Look for more challenging reading; seek out those who enjoy talking to you; talk to a counselor.

But the main cure will come with time. (BTW, thinking that your intelligence could solve big problems is unrealistic. But consider doing something worthwhile with your life. Most of the people doing the most worthwhile things get no fame from it; you can work in near anonymity, and do a lot of good.)

Answer 4

I can relate to you a lot, you have no idea how much. I know how hard it feels, i have the same problem. I am intelligent as well, but I feel so different from everyone els. Every second of my life I analyzes the world, finding cures and seeing the flaw in the world. Your mind is going to a transfer state right now, you can either choose to be normal like everyone els or be your self. one thing i have realized in this world is that there is no god.

"weird ones are the ones who change the course of history not normal people." Use my philosophy: be proud of what u have, you should realize that the world isn't ready for you.

Good luck finding someone, its going to be hard trust me, i know. i am already considering dieing alone.... , unless i find ?

Answer 5

Oh , now now , u got a very wonderful gift ... Brains is very useful in life , but , u said this makes u alone ... well , use ur brains ... I mean , if people hate u for that , then all u have to do is share people with ur brains and show them its not that bad and can be loved ... if people are jealous , then u can't do a ting , but if they are just ... erm u know like envy u for this gift , then u might share it with them ... how .?
its easy , offer to help some with study or do some research together , no one love intelligent girls who keep it all to them selves ...

btw , that dream of urs , marrying and having kids ... its wonderful , even better than cancer thing or world hunger , let the world deal with itself and have fun in ur life ...
Pass ur intelligence to a full generation of kids who -one day- solve the world's problems ... !

Ok , have fun with ur brains ... Oh oh wait , if u don't wanna troubles in ur marriage , don't PLEASE don't show ur man that u r smarter than he is ... Just try to lower ur thought and lead ur man to find the solution himself ... even if this is stupid I know it will comfort him the best -look at my avatar to know why I know -

Ok good luck

Cheers ... !

Answer 6

I understand where you are coming from and sympathize with your dilemma. Is it possible for you to become active in groups that are not connected to your academic environment? People who don't know what your I.Q. is? Otherwise, can you contact a group of equally intelligent people? You will then find that you are not the only one to feel the way you do and you may get some good suggestions on how to fit in better. Good luck.

Answer 7

I'm 46 years old and when I was young I found that I could retain any information that was thrown at me, everything was too easy. I rebelled and threw it all away. However at 40 years of age I had the opportunity to gain a degree. Don't waste this gift but try not to take yourself too seriously, best of luck.

Answer 8

I think that you should stop thinking about yourself all the time and become interested in something worthwhile, e.g. volunteering.

Many people other than yourself receive unwanted attention, e.g. fat, extremely tall or short people, beautiful or ugly, etc, etc. but they don't go on and on about it. Since I'm fat you can bet your boots that I hear what people have to say about me but I don't dwell on it.

I think your whining is really a form of bragging about how intelligent you are & seeking attention.

I consider intelligent people to be fortunate & blessed with a gift not given to most. I think you have a duty to use it constructively and you aren't.

Answer 9

you know for someone with such an IQ, you really are egocentric, immature and a pain in the rear. You probably earn all those whispers and looks, because along with your "intelligence" you probably rarely smile, you appear frosty, superior and unapproachable. I suggest if you want to be accepted by humanity, you act a bit more like a human being and less like some sort of superior race. Intelligence is not all there is to life, the sooner you learn that, the happier you will be.

Answer 10

Ah yes, it seems that no matter how smart we are, we can't escape the fact that we are social animals and deep down we desperately long to be accepted, even if it is by our lessors.