In a Relationship. Living together do couple share the cost of bills or is does only one person pay for them?

Question

In a relationship for 5 years and they started living together. The woman was paying for all the bills such as rent, food and bills. The man got a $1000 plus coming in to him as income. It fights started because the man was refusing to contribute to the household. His excuses was the place was not in his name so he should not have to pay rent and that he was in a relationship with her. He didn't want to help out with purchasing the food either or bills. When he gets his check he would immediately spend it and by the time it came to the following weekend for them to go out he would say he was broke because he blow all his money when he was out with his friends all week. So that costed even more money to her for them to go out. There are children also involved that they had together. The man had got mad because the woman refused to lend him any money but yet he didn't give her a cent when she ask him for money to help out with living costs. He left left and told her to grow up

Answer 1

I've seen different formulas.

Some people say I earn 60% of the income and therefore should pay 60% of the expenses.

In my case. I pay:
- car
- insurance
- mortgage
- electric
- water
- property tax
- condo fee
- groceries
- phone
- internet
- cable

Wife Pays
- daycare

I'd say she's getting a sweet deal. :)

Answer 2

It sure should be shared. I wouldn't want to be living with someone when I don't know how much they make and risk being evicted or ruining credit because the other person didn't make enough or spend frivolously. What do you have to hide? As far as credit reports and fico scores I personally don't think that is no ones business unless you are considering marrying them. And many experts claim that married couples shouldn't have seperate bank accounts. I don't agree with that either. I believe each should have own seperate accounts and a join account where you both contribute and only use as a emergency fund or for whatever.

Answer 3

If he left, then under no circumstances should she let his a.s.s come back until he man's up and starts helping out with the bills. If he continues to mooch off her and she continues to let him then that is her fault, she needs to learn when to put her foot down.
In a relationship it is an equal partnership, of course if the two partners decide that one should remain the money maker and the other a housewife/mother then that's fine and dandy because that is what they chose to do and they are both okay with it.
The man your talking about above seems like a rude, selfish, inconsiderate jerk who has no life and frankly that woman is waaay better off without him. She needs to find a man that will love her, be equal with her and not use her like the man above is/was because that is not right, she does not deserve it.
In a relationship there should be no such thing as "mine" or "yours" instead it should be "ours", a comitted relationship means your comitted to everything. See my husband and I have a joint bank account and when we get paid both our checks go into "our" account so everything in that account is both mine and my husbands, we do not go by who makes more, or who pays what. What/s mine is his and what's his is mine!

Take his a.s.s to court and get what he owes you, that is what i would tell her.

Answer 4

What a freakin' LOSER!!!!! She should be throwing a party over the fact he is gone. What a JERK....... In a relationship both people need to contribute. Sometimes one person may contribute a little more at times, and the other other person may pick up the slack on other occasions. That's how it works. Obviously she already knows she can make it on her own. I just hope he is made to pay some type of child support, he helped make the children, he should help take care of them in every way! I highly doubt he will pay anything even if court ordered, they will probably have to automatically take it out of his check...since he just likes to blow his money whooping it up with the boys. HE IS THE ONE WHO NEEDS TO GROW UP & face REALITY!!!!!

Answer 5

In my relationship, living together not yet married, we share a joint bank account and never fight about money. For us, there is no concept of his and her money, just our money. Just like marriage, whatever works for the couple is best. Some married people don't pool their money , same goes with those who live together. Some don't and some do. I suspect that more married couples pool their money though because many cannot trust their partner without making the marriage official. This guy sounds like a user and a bum.

Answer 6

Sounds more like he was the one that needed to grow up.
Of course when people are in a relationship they both contribute to paying the bills, even if one can not contribute as much as the other.

Answer 7

he told her to grow up, that funny. why does he seems to think that it is only her responsibility to pay for things? all the bill and food are taking care of the children, which are his, too. if that's the way that he wants to act, i say good luck to him. she's better off without him. she's doing it all on her own now anyway.

Answer 8

This woman is either blind or stupid.

He is using her. He is using her home as a crash pad, and using her for her money. He has a free place to live, and is RATIONALIZING the fact he does not help with bills. Even if the place is in her name, it should not matter.

thank god he left. I hope she never accepts him back into her world. She already has kids.. she doesn't need him to come back, since he acts like one!

Answer 9

If he is living with her and they are in a relationship together than each party should have to contribute equally to the household. Sounds to me as if he is just using her and free loading off her. She needs to talk to him in a calm way and tell him he is going to have to help out or get out.

Answer 10

He's worthless and won't get off the gravy train until he's pushed and I would take both feet to do so. If he's eating, sleeping, screwing, have kids there, and receiving mail their then guess what the word of the day is for him- responsible. He owes you money. Get it and push him out.