Would you accept your spouse fantasizing about another when making love to you?
Would you feel cheated? How would you react?
2007-10-26 03:47:26 · 43 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
some definitions of cheating:
To mislead; fool: illusions that cheat the eye.
To elude; escape:
To act dishonestly; practice fraud.
To violate rules deliberately
yes it is cheating....
1. you are misleading your partner that you only have eyes for them and that you are sharing a sacred moment when in reality they are just a body to be used while your mind is elsewhere.
2. You are escaping a precious moment by fantasizing your way to other partners.
3. You are being dishonest...it is a lie to show love with your body but contempt with your heart
It is wrong and unhealthy...it opens the door for actual physical cheating. Lust is mental fornication. **** is addictive and many families have been torn apart by unhealthy imaginations. My very dear friend is going through a horrible divorce with children involved because of her husbands fantasies. It started out with just thinking about, escalated all the way to **** addiction, spending money on strippers to harassing/abusing her, both verbally and physically, to fulfill his lusts which include other partners male and female......It can spiral out of control and having someone fantasize, even if it does not progress to those extreme levels is still hurtful and causes an emotional wedge between two people who are sharing the most vulnerable parts of themselves.
2007-10-26 04:07:30 · answer #1 · answered by rayneshowers 3 · 4⤊ 1⤋
According to you it may seem like you are not cheating your partner, but dont you think you are cheating? A person who fantasizes when making love with a spouse says something about the person, that they are not happy. Fantasizing is an act of thinking of the unreal when the real is unacceptable. It simply says you dont like your spouse completely. If a person lives in the world of fantasy then this relationship is surely doing to break, today it is fantasy tomorrow it will be real when the spouse is going to find what he/she wants in real form.
How can one accept? You are a willing partner to say, its ok you think of someone else, That is so pathetic that the person has to go to that level to feel important. This is low selfesteem to allow this to happen, the quality of relationship is very poor.
2007-10-26 04:43:39 · answer #2 · answered by thachu5 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Most people fantasize during sex (some do it before and after, too), and it's perfectly okay, as long as it doesn't become an obsession. But, one thing is to fantasize about a movie star and another -very different- is to fantasize about your spouse's best friend. I would be very upset if my husband ever told me he fantasized about one of my friends. If he does, he better be smart enough not to let me know...it would change and affect everything in bed, between us, forever.
2007-10-26 04:30:41 · answer #3 · answered by MiaMonique 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
It's not cheating because it's all in your mind. I believe that it is faiulry common among people who have been together along time. I have done it, but I would never mention that to my spouse. If he has done it or does do it...I would rather not know. Usually when I do it...it just happens, it's not planned. I then try to refocus myself back to my spouse because he is the one pleasuring me.
I wouldn't feel cheated just a little hurt, but I'm thinking he might feel the same way.
2007-10-26 03:52:30 · answer #4 · answered by J9 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I sometimes fantasize about another woman to get me going but once things get down to business the only woman on my mind is my spouse. No I do not think it is cheating.
2007-10-26 04:15:30 · answer #5 · answered by countryguyhfc 5 · 1⤊ 2⤋
I think its something that happens, I dont necessarily think it is wrong, unless you do it everytime and want the person your fantasize about, I think sometimes it can make sex more intense and fun, but I wouldnt tell my spouse that Im thinking of another man while we are in the act and I wouldnt want to know either. I think thats something that you enjoy and keep to yourself.
2007-10-26 04:04:42 · answer #6 · answered by Sweetpea 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
First of all, I don't know that I would know if my husband were fantasizing or if so who.
If I did know, I suppose I'd have to ask why. Maybe I'm terrible at making love and need to step up my game?
I would not feel cheated because my imagination can conjure up images of Idris Elba very easily, no ordinary husband can compare with that fantasy.
2007-10-26 03:55:25 · answer #7 · answered by darkdiva 6 · 0⤊ 2⤋
If one wanna fantasize (with intention to spice up ya sex life) while making out with the partner... then make sure that's pure harmless fantasizing and DO NOT even let your fantasies be found out. That would be so hurtful.
Considered emotional cheating... not of the physical range.
2007-10-26 03:54:34 · answer #8 · answered by glitzynicole 3 · 1⤊ 2⤋
No, it's not cheating. A very high % of people (men and women) do it. It's normal and 'safe' because it's inside your head only. That doesn't mean you actually want to have sex with the person in your head, but it's a way to spice up or add variety to your sex life in a safe and non-threatening (to your partner) way.
I've done it, I'm 100% sure some (if not all) of my partners have done it. It's a non-issue (but also something you probably wouldn't want to discuss with your partner lest jealousies emerge).
2007-10-26 03:53:35 · answer #9 · answered by . 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
If you are not enjoying your spouse making love to you and fantasizing doing it with someone else, that is cheating with your brain. You are using your husbands effort and transferring them to someone else.
Do you love your husband?
If you do you need to stop this practise and commit your mind to him only.
2007-10-26 03:57:21 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋