when someone says they love you but aren't "in love" with you doesn't " in love " really mean - the new relationship feeling ,the can't get enough of each other, enjoying getting to know each other feeling is gone. so the question is do you call it quites ? i mean if you get into another relationship eventualy its gonna happen agian in a few years or so , and so on
do you stay and deal with it or get into a new relationship every 5-10 years or so?
2007-10-25 17:13:28 · 9 answers · asked by just me 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
A marriage is supposed to last a lifetime, but so often it doesn't.
I think when a person says that "love but not in love" they mean feeling sexual or attractedness. Men nowadays are so fickle with so much porn and loose women available, they think the grass is greener on the other side. Many are selfish and do not consider the wife who has invested years in loving them, nor the children, their own flesh and blood.
2007-10-25 17:26:52 · answer #1 · answered by frillyfroofroo 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think one of our biggest problems with relationships is that we have only one word - love - for a variety of feelings and sentiments. We have no accurate way of expressing our feelings through our limited language.
Sure, we try to use the word lust to describe a carnal attraction as opposed to a more caring relationship, but often "love" just doesn't do it.
The love I feel for my wife of 36 years is in some ways the same and in other ways different from the love I felt for her when we first got married. I can't explain it. Language fails me.
So, what does it mean when a person says that they love you but they are not "in love" with you? In my opinion, it's up to private interpretation. I would say that such a person does not want to make a formal commitment but still cares - perhaps very deeply - for the other. But, that's just a guess.
Those of us that have battled through all of the ups and downs of marriage are not quite sure how we did it, but somehow, it all worked out. Bottom line, I think people stay married because they want to. Period. Love is a big part of it, but it's not all there is to it.
2007-10-25 17:57:42 · answer #2 · answered by SafetyDancer 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My husband and I are in love with each other. If he flat out told me that he wasn't in love anymore and said he never would be and was sure that the feeling was not there for him anymore, I would be out of there so fast, his head would spin. Thats not true love. He doesn't really love you as much as that hurts. There is hope that you are going to find a man that really loves you and won't back out. My husband and I have had so many awful fights and we've been through a lot. But he loves me...that I'm always certain of. Get out and move on...you'll find the right one someday, someone who respects and loves you no matter what. Good luck.
2007-10-25 17:26:02 · answer #3 · answered by sun day 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If my husband told me that he loves me, but he's not "in love" with me, I would definitely call it quits. It would -of course- hurt me very much, but I think I deserve to be with someone who is not only caring, but also passionate, and dedicated to making me happy; just as I am willing to do everything (almost) to make my husband happy. You don't necessarily fall out of love after 5-10 years; that depends on the type of relationship you have from the beginning and the effort the people involved are willing to put into making it work.
2007-10-25 17:30:36 · answer #4 · answered by MiaMonique 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
"in love " is for the begining of the relationship ...but once your in a long -term relationship its just "love" and the feeling of how you both felt when you are new will be gone but that doesnt mean the love is gone...it is just the feelin of sweeping your feet off and now its gone...but of course you stay in a relationship still together...and thoughts of leaving the person is because you are finding that same feeling again of "in love"...but i can tell you once your in a long-term relationship you wouldnt want to get into another relationship because of how far you work for it with your partner unless.. your lacking out of love form him then you are eager to look for someon else...
i believe its a normal feeling wanting the that again...
2007-10-25 17:27:09 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
if some one says that they love you but aren't in love with you then that's just what it is you should just move on an let that go because you will never get back what you put into it even if you are in love with that person they will never change their mind so don't jump in an out of love but just look for some one that fits you an will love you for how you are an makes you happy.
2007-10-25 17:22:59 · answer #6 · answered by C.S. 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no, it really means that they care for you but not enough to be married forever. It doesn't necessarily happen in every relationship.....as dorky as it sounds, I am more in love with my husband every single day.....after 16 years, I still get warm and fuzzy when he comes home from work.
2007-10-25 17:21:12 · answer #7 · answered by Lisa W 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
first of all stop letting him use you that.s for start.s then take your time with who you find and dont jump when he tell.s you to my opion?
2007-10-25 17:22:52 · answer #8 · answered by the_silverfoxx 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
TRUE Love IS A LIFESTYLE.................NOT A FEEL GOOD EMOTIONS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Love STILL IN EXISTENCE WHEN YOU ARE NOT FEELING HAPPY!!!!!!!!!!!!!IT IS NOT IN OR OUT TRUE LOVE IS WHETHER YOU ARE UP OR DOWN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2007-10-25 17:27:34 · answer #9 · answered by Mrs.Tricey 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋