i have been with my bf for 8 years and he has kind of hinted around about getting married well we have an 11 month old son but he has cheated on me atleast 5 times he even left me for another girl when i was 8 months pregnant.
should i say yes or no
2007-10-25 16:45:52 · 31 answers · asked by rebelmom 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I cant help but think that not all the information has been disclosed inthis question.
Look into your heart. Feel for the answer. If that doesn't help. Get a pen and paper and write out 2 lists of reasons.
Good Luck.
2007-10-25 16:51:07 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'll try not to be judgmental with you. Two things- should you get married? I'd say no. The can of worms you opened when you said he cheated on you five times (that you know of) and ran off with another girl is what others are clutching their chest(s) over. Most people wouldn't stay with anyone who is this unfaithful. Once is usually enough to dump him. You, OTOH, have stayed with him after a lot of his bad behavior.
I'm a man, but I wouldn't stay with this guy if I were you. I'm not sure what your reasons are for staying. Maybe you should go see a counselor and figure out what's best for you and your child. From the perspective of not knowing either of you, I'd say, "Don't marry him." Since you're not saying more, you should get professional advice. Good luck ...
2007-10-25 17:09:50 · answer #2 · answered by going_for_baroque 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Run!!! I had a guy who did the same crap to me. I finally dumped him when our son was a month old. The first night we got to go out after our son was born, he cheated on me. If you stay in this relationship you will probably get an std. You will also probably have to deal with him getting another girl pregnant. Several of my friends also dated guys like this. One of the guys is shacked up with crack head now. The other has four babies by three different girls. Guys like that will never change. He might love you, but he doesn't respect you. And respect is more important than love. If he doesn't respect you now he never will. So RUN!!!!!
2007-10-25 17:01:15 · answer #3 · answered by Kima 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes or no to what, he has already knocked you up, slept with other girls, left you when you needed him most and now you say he is hinting?!? Are you O.K.? Why should he marry you? For you guys' child? Does not sound like you are in a winning or lasting relationship. Yes or no should have been said a long time ago. Do what you gotta do. Good luck
2007-10-25 16:57:12 · answer #4 · answered by Modern Man 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hell No Dont Marry him! He has cheated at least 5 times....life is to short to be worrying about what he is up to all the time. You and your baby should be happy. If you can be happy with him then marry him...but if you cant trust him then can you truly be happy? He obviosly does not respect you. Has he cheated on you since your son was born? Has he changed his ways since then? Its doubtful if he has cheated that much that he can be faithful for any length of time....maybe wait a bit longer and see if he can be faithful before tying the knot!
2007-10-25 17:05:21 · answer #5 · answered by Kay 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No ,because he does not seem responsible and will cheat on you even If the 2 of you are married. Stay the way you are for now and pretend to be married and see what he does. If he still acts the same then there goes your answer.
2007-10-25 16:52:07 · answer #6 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well this is a hard question but he ask you to marry him but his not capable of being trust and rely on. but this shows no matter who he cheats or left you on your own while you were pregnent..he always seems to find his way back to you..and now he chose you to be his wife, his life , his everything.
i dont wanna be the one to tell you yes or no but you know it deep down inside if its a yes or a no.
think it over again
there are men who change and there are men who just stays the same...but dont forget his the father of your child too ..does he take responsibility as a father ?does he treat you right now? does he apologizes everytime he hurt?
if all the answer is no to the question then maybe his not the one for you anymore.
But think about if his worth really giving another chance again.
2007-10-25 17:12:37 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds like you are feeling stuck or addicted to this man...is it love that keeps you around him? or the hope of a better future that he'll be different maybe or that he cant help his behaviour and he means well really...or is it your son, that hes a good Dad to your son and you like being a family when he suits himself?
I wonder what exactly your self talk is about this man? What are you saying to yourself to see reality so that you will stay with him and will contemplate continuing this for your whole life?How do you convince yourself?
Theres a space between reality and you if you are contemplating this.
What I hope for you is to break this addiction to this guy, get your self esteem together and have a bright future. You can be loved totally both you and your son but this man isnt sounding ready for that level of commitment no matter what he is saying to you.
I wish you strength and clarity of thought right now.
2007-10-25 16:58:06 · answer #8 · answered by Sunshine Girl 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes, if you're a complete fool. Even Puff Diddy's girlfriend woke up after 10 years and a set of twins and decided she had no more time to give a relationship that was going no where. You need to know when to fold them and move on with your career/education, etc. Not all men are committed to a monogamous relationship. He had another woman pregnant in another state.
2007-10-25 17:00:25 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
if he has cheated that much and you have accepted him back every time, what will stop him next time? Especially when you were 8 months pregnant! What a jerk! I am sure he has moments when he is nice and good to you, but you are asking for misery if you commit to him. Don't rush anything. And don't feel like you need to because of your son.
2007-10-25 16:59:41 · answer #10 · answered by flower 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋