Ok I have been with this man for 25 years now and every year at about the same time he turns into the biggest rear end ? can anybody enlighten me with what might be going on is it possible something traumatized him and it triggers a this behavior. The rest of the year he is a great provider, lover and father. I am not sure I can do 25 more years if I don't figure this out. Last year was without major attitude problem. I thought we had got past the Oct-Dec problem. Please I know I have not given alot of details but if anyone one has a clue please let me know. I am open to just about anything.
2007-10-25 16:11:27 · 16 answers · asked by chippers 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
To the one who said just talk to him. Thanks maybe in January ? No kidding aside I have , I have asked his family without luck. First I thought it was the holidays he did not have great holidays and I always had the best. Then I thought maybe is first wife left him in this time ? he was only married 3 months no children. Then I figured it was his Mothers fault or maybe his dads he left when he was four years old ? I have heard that some people go thru a depression in certain times of the year ? Yesterday was Happy ! Happy ! today I am every name in the book.
2007-10-25 16:26:29 · update #1
This does not take rocket science.
You comment that "The rest of the year he is a great provider, lover and father."
Do you have any clue what type of stress the holidays puts on a man like that?
I absolutely hate Christmas, we already have everything. If I got my wish we'd all go to the islands, get drunk, and play on the beach.
2007-10-25 17:11:37 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's because the holidays are approching.. Maybe he has some bad childhood memories of this time of year. Did he lose a loved one this time of year.. or it could be simply that it is his way of dealing with the holidays. See if things aren't that great between you two, then he may feel less presured about what to get you for christmas because you will just be satisfied that he even care enough to get you anything at all.. or that he is disapointed in himself because he financally couldn't get what he wanted for you and the family.. I could go on and on about what it might be, but I think you need to have a talk and get him to open up. tell him your concerned and want to have a memorable holiday season and to put whatever it is that sets him off this time of year in the lord's hands and just thank him for another year of love marriage friendship and health.. when you begin to be thankful for what you do have then the things you don't won't seem so important.. and the things of the past won't be seen again in the future.. i hope you have a wonderful holiday season..
2007-10-25 23:29:02 · answer #2 · answered by lady 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I dated a Manic Depressive for three years before I found out he was Manic. I did notice that during the holidays he would be more distant and then one day he went from being a sweet, patient, understanding and secure guy to a jealous, controlling, insecure guy. When I snapped back he realized it was time to tell me he had a problem. Your guy may have some sort of depression and doesn't acknowledge it or want you to know about it. Mental illness still has a stigma against it. My guy got worse every year and yours may to. You either have to find a way to deal with it or sadly you may have to leave for your own sanity. Kay Jamison is a author of many books dealing with Mania and she is a sufferer herself. It will help you decide what to do.
2007-10-26 11:02:50 · answer #3 · answered by Dancer3d 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Many people experience some sort of depression during this timeframe. I'm not sure why. Maybe it's because the summer is over and we're heading into winter which causes the days to become shorter, therefore, less sunlight. I get that way to, but I try not to let it interfere with my life too much or affect my relationships.
2007-10-26 07:52:24 · answer #4 · answered by willie_mosconi 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well I know that certain times of the year like winter I get depressed and have a different attitude in winter than I do summer. The elements, the warmth and the sun can affect ones attitude. I am an outdoors person and love the hot weather and when it gets colder..I hate it and get grumpy...
2007-10-25 23:25:03 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
My husband does the same thing. We have been married 12 years and every Oct. till the next year he is in a walk on eggshell funk. So join the club. Me and the kids stay busy and out the house when he is off which isn't often thank God!
2007-10-26 00:48:24 · answer #6 · answered by Greeneyedqt 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe its a hormonal thing like us women have? Men do have hormone issues, just in different ways than we do. Or maybe it is stress at work, or the fact that the holidays are coming up and he may need to do a rush job on all his work that needs to be turned in so he can have a nice holiday vacation with you.
P.S. My late husband was a teacher and every six weeks was like pulling teeth out of him to do anything nice. He was sweet and I miss him but things will work out. :)
2007-10-25 23:32:05 · answer #7 · answered by IDoToo 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You think maybe he stresses over what to get you for X-Mas? Or about all the expenses on food, gifts, decorations? Or he gets the common holiday "blues"? I'm sure you've tried cheering him up in any possible way...have you tried getting him something special, something he would really appreciate and that would keep him busy? Does he have a hobby? Help him get over his weird attitude by keeping his mind occupied in something he enjoys to do.
2007-10-25 23:25:43 · answer #8 · answered by MiaMonique 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OMG! if you get answer let me know bc I swear my bf does the SAME thing around december , nothing serious he's just really crabby (together for 5 years) I think it has something to do with the Holidays I cant figure it out,unless he has seasonal affective disorder, but its really only around december...and when I ask him hes just like "really, I dont notice it"?
2007-10-25 23:17:35 · answer #9 · answered by jayo88 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe its PMS (that time of the year) or Menopause--just joking. Maybe somebodies birthday is around that time of year or a death in the family occurred around that time....maybe its simply the holiday's, he gets stressed.
2007-10-25 23:19:58 · answer #10 · answered by BossLady 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋