if you ladies married a husband whom was a virgin, never had a kiss or any female interaction. he is 100% straight but he is nervous about having sex, he doesnt tell you that and whenever anything sexual comes up he tries to change the subject. what would be your honest reaction and what would you honestly do?
2007-10-25 15:01:52 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
cleveland! i'm from there...
I'm a virgin too, and I really would be attracted to a male that was a virgin. I think it shows a lot of self control which a lot of men have shown that they dont possess....Many men are afraid of being bad in bed. Whoever has more experience should take over in the bed and take the pressure off. Lots of foreplay will make up for performance. Also, I think communication and possitive feedback afterward is important to a healthy sex life.
2007-10-25 15:16:43 · answer #1 · answered by smartass23 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
In all honesty, I would probably doubt his orientation and if you love him let him go so he can be happy. Sometimes gay people marry because they feel is the "right" thing to do even though its better to follow your heart. You cant be sure unless you talk though(because marrying a woman does not mean you dont like men). On the other hand, perhaps he is not and is just a little insecure. I'd seek counseling. A marriage could possibly work without sex, but I'm damned unwilling to try:)
2007-10-25 15:11:25 · answer #2 · answered by kysha360 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds to me like there is some kind of issue or something happened to him when he was a child to make him feel this way. Try asking him if something did and tell him he can talk to you about anything in confidence and you will not judge him or ridicule him. Sometimes talking about it and getting it off your chest can do a world of good and make you alot less nervous with your partner. If talking on a regular basis doesn't help, seek sexual counseling together to resolve this. I can almost guarantee you some trauma is behind this. Most men cannot wait.
2007-10-25 15:36:41 · answer #3 · answered by jennniferlea 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would feel kind of weird b/c you try to change the subject everytime it come up
Of course, i would know or feel your discomfort toward it. And i know you like women, if not there will not be a marriage.
i would of course try to find out what is bothering you then try to help you face it.
Once marry, it's best to be honest toward each other. It's nothing to be ashame of. As of matter of fact, you should be proud of it. Since now a day most people don't wait until they marry. “Good Luck"
Have your ever saw that movie "40 yr old virgin", if not you should watch it. It's funny and you'll love it.
2007-10-25 15:16:15 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would try to show some patience with him.
After all, this whole sexual world is a new one to him. It might just take some time for him to sort of give himself permission to be sexual, to enjoy it, and to freely talk about it with me.
I would slowly show him the many different aspects of sex, the heat and passion, and that sex can also be downright fun at times.
2007-10-25 15:15:07 · answer #5 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would honestly think there is something wrong with me if he wasn't willing to have an intimate relationship together. Sooner or later I would ask what is wrong and with him being truthful we could take things slow until he was ready. If guys can wait on girls then it shouldn't be any different the other way around.
2007-10-25 15:08:46 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I married a virgin, a good woman knows how to handle this. I did, celebrated our 30 th anniversary this July. If he is a virgin talk of sex should excite him not nauseate him. Something is wrong.
2007-10-25 15:17:17 · answer #7 · answered by Glinda W 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If my husband did that to me, I would think he found me unattractive if he tried to avoid any sexual contact, or maybe a germaphobe. I would try to talk to him about it, and express how it was hurting me because I would feel rejected all the time and be frustrated that, being his wife, he can't even talk to me about what's bothering him.
If talking to him did not work then i would have to reconsider why I married a man who can not even trust me enough to talk to me about his issues.
2007-10-25 15:06:30 · answer #8 · answered by Stine 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Forget it! I'd want a man who can teach me a thing or two about sex, not someone who's afraid of my sexuality. No way... Sorry if I sound shallow, but I could never be with someone who's afraid of sex.
2007-10-25 15:09:03 · answer #9 · answered by MiaMonique 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think thats great for both, i would be surprised cause i really dont know anyone that has not had sex or at least kissed. i would try to understand, respect his feeling and just say u know that sooner or later is gonna happen, we both love each other and its gonna be even better. and just go easy.
thats what i would do, say.
2007-10-25 15:08:59 · answer #10 · answered by prettyinpink03@verizon.net 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋