and no longer give effort to ask you why... what does it mean?
2007-10-25 08:10:08 · 24 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
i don't cry often.
2007-10-25 08:16:17 · update #1
Wow, sounds like he isn't emotionally available. If he doesn't seem to care that your hurting confront him about why not. If he should be concerned for any ones happiness it should be you, his wife. I'm sorry, hope things work out for you.
But, if this is something that happens often maybe you should choose your battles so to speak...
2007-10-25 08:14:32 · answer #1 · answered by Poptart 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
That is a very broad and general question.
It may depend on the "reason" you are crying. Many couples do not realize that there are many times a spouse will immediately start crying, not truly because they are simply hurting and needing love, but it is a method of terminating a conversation; just shutting it down. Shutting the other person from talking or communicating.
You really need to ask yourself when and why you are crying.
If it is in the midst of a misunderstanding or arguement, then allow yourself a short brief time, and then resolve the situation and get back to communicating properly.
While crying is normal and and expression of hurt, it can also be used to manipulate others, whether consciously or uncousiously.
Stating that he doesn't care anymore is a harsh accusation. You are surmizing this because of what? He doesn't come to sweep you off your feet?
You are lacking communication with him, and understanding how men and women are made. A more accurate question would be "why doesn't he ask why", instead of unfairly connecting his not asking why, with not caring.
Don't sabatoge your own relationship with jabs and hurtful remarks. Instead, seek truth and understanding as to why things do or do not happen. I'm confident you'll find that with a little mature communication on both parts, you'll end up in each others arms wiping each others tears away, feeling and knowing that each of you truly does care about each other.
2007-10-25 08:40:16 · answer #2 · answered by splashdesign238 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the answer to that question really depends on other factors. Do you cry often on rare occasions? When you cry is it just because you are really emotionally distressed or has it come to the point that every little thing starts the tears to flowing and the whining to begin? If you cry quite often, maybe he has gotten actually used to it until it doesn't have the same effect on him anymore as he has become numb to it. Also, maybe he has come to the point where he feels that he cannot help you anymore and is at a point where he feels helpless and that in turn can make him seel callous to you as he doesn't give you attention when you cry. You can cry over the little things until he gets to a point where he no longer pays attention. The moral of the story ...its like the boy crying wolf so many times that when there was a wolf, no one listened.
2007-10-25 08:20:25 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
It usually means that he is tired of asking what is wrong only to receive a typical "nothing" answer. You need to decide whether you want him to know what the problem is so he might address it or if your goal is to see "how much he cares" by making him ask (much) more than once. You can't have both.
If he appears inattentive, it is usually out of frustration (that no matter what he says or does nothing will change or get better) or retaliation for the lack of attention, admiration or acknowledgment he might receive from you, perceived or otherwise.
Time to start thinking this problem starting with the image in the mirror and truly evaluating what can be done to improve your situation.
In other words, men don't just stop caring for no reason...something prompts us to minimize how much we might care for something.
Good luck.
2007-10-25 08:19:02 · answer #4 · answered by Think-It-Through 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That he does not care enough anymore to know why you are crying or doesn't care to know why. Maybe it's time you made a move to leave him. It also sounds like he is bored with the relationship. It sounds like he has already moved on mentally. It is time for you to move on. Sorry you asked. It sounds like the two of you have drifted apart but neither one of you has the guts to leave.
2007-10-25 15:45:25 · answer #5 · answered by simplesimon 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if i cried and my husband didn't ask why i would be asking myself this same question.....so i can't answer what he is thinking but i can give you an example.....if i cry and my husband does not know why he will always be by my side until it is resolved. he is a stand by your women man.and that to a women says alot.
i feel for you cause no-one should be alone when they cry. your husband is suppose to be first, your best friend(at least thats what i think).
well i will say the right answer here....you should talk to him and see what he says maybe he is shy, or doesn't know what to say. but if he makes fun of you.....leave his sorry a**.....
if he is doing it on purpose hold the door for him on his way out.
2007-10-25 08:58:06 · answer #6 · answered by mimi 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
How often are you crying? Why are you crying? Is it always the same reason? He may just feel like he can't help anymore.
2007-10-25 08:13:31 · answer #7 · answered by מימי 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
It means that he has exhausted his feelings when it comes to tears and manipulation.
Stop using tears, start using WORDS. I know you are frustrated, but words are MUCH more effective. Write it out, if you have to. Practice saying what you want to say. Be DIRECT, nothing added but the facts. Guys are so all about STRAIGHT talk and that's what they want from us!
He is tuning you out when you start to cry because he has no energy to fight you. (To them, tears are emotional blackmail and if he doesn't WANT to give in, he just shuts down.)
He wants you to have a mature relationship and to be able to talk things out and for you to see his position.
Try it, if you find yourself reducing to tears, tell him you need to grab a breather and then go back when you have composed yourself. I guarantee, he will appreciate your maturity. He will KNOW that he can get through to you when you are lucid. You cannot reach a person who is crying.
2007-10-25 08:17:41 · answer #8 · answered by The Y!ABut 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Assume he knows why you're crying. Might be, he is satisfied that he can't fix what's wrong with your crying.
Time to see a counselor, maybe for the two of you, but for yourself for sure.
2007-10-25 08:14:29 · answer #9 · answered by going_for_baroque 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Not trying to be mean but most men don't care if you cry if you are doing it too much. It makes them think you are a drama queen. I know from experience.
2007-10-25 08:14:15 · answer #10 · answered by Marissa H 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋