This is for those of you who have kids, especially older kids, like in their teens now. In other words, you've been at this a while and know what it's all about. If you could start over at the point before you had kids, KNOWING WHAT YOU KNOW NOW, would you have kids again?
I'm asking this because there was a poll taken in some women's magazine (Women's Day or Good Housekeeping or something) that asked that same question, and over 80% of the women who responded said NO, if they knew then what they know now, they wouldn't have kids. They cited things like the financial drain, the emotional drain, the time drain, the drain on their very life energy, etc. as reasons why they would not.
When the results came back, people were truly shocked that THAT many women wouldn't have kids if they could go back and do it all again, knowing what they know now.
So, would you?
Why, or why not?
2007-10-25 07:46:59 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Well obviously - I would because my children are 20 - 12 - 6 - and 4!
I have ZERO regret over having my children. Yes, they changed my life. Yes, they are expensive little things! Yes, they wear me out!
But there is nothing that can ever equal being a parent! When all else goes wrong or even right - nothing trumps an "I love you, Mommy".
I was brought up with the old native American belief that the world does not belong to the old, it is borrowed from the young. Our children are the most precious thing in the world and we are lucky to even have the chance to be parents - despite the pitfalls that come along with it.
2007-10-25 08:03:34 · answer #1 · answered by Susie D 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Knowing what I know now I would have to say NO I wouldn't have had kids because I was 16 when I started having kids I never really got to be a teenager myself and apart of me wishes I could go back and have those years again but this time without the kids but theres no way possible to do that so I must live in the here and now not the past!
2007-10-25 07:54:23 · answer #2 · answered by wildone 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'd do it all over again. I didn't really care for the baby stage but my son is now 13 and we have a blast together, I've been raising him on my own since he was 4 (he does go to Dads every other weekend) Yes it is a financial drain and a time drain, my son plays every sport known to man, just the gas getting him to and from practices and games is a fortune but I wouldn't trade it for the world. Signed a Mom on the way out the door for a football game Go #77
2007-10-25 07:57:27 · answer #3 · answered by Girly1 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Yes in spite of a three year running custody battle, discovering chronic illness which resulted in one surgery thus far, the pain of missing a dearly loved son who passed on of SIDS, and all the other drains you mentioned. I would trade the three months I knew my son, and four years of knowing my daughter for nothing. Where else can an ordinary mortal experience absolute love and trust, that pride over accomplishments no matter how minor, or the joy that floods your heart when you see then after any length of separation ( even half a school day!)?
2007-10-25 08:08:49 · answer #4 · answered by thatWhitegirl 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I probably would-but definately later. I don't have a problem with my kids, they are the best part of my life. But the marriage is a whole different story. Wish I could have had the kids with a different husband. I was 23 when I had my first kid (2 years after being married). 31 when I had my last one. You would have thought that after being married a couple years I would have seen the warning signs. But now that my kids are older (I'm over 40) I have lots of issues with the marriage that counseling isn't fixing. Can't blame the kids for any of it though.
2007-10-25 07:59:06 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Mine are 1 and 6, and they are a drain in every way you mention. But they're also a constant source of amazement.
If I never had kids, I'd have been okay with that. But having had them, I can't imagine life without them.
Troll S (I'll bite):
Obviously most people disagree, and that's cool for them that it was so wonderful. But I agree, I HATED the first few months of babyhood -- and it was no better the second time around. But it does get awesome. Hang in.
2007-10-25 07:55:02 · answer #6 · answered by David Carrington Jr. 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hell YES! I have 6 kids, ages 23, 20, 18, 6, 4, and 2.
I wouldn't trade my kids for anything, yes, all 3 of my older kids gave me heck as teens, but I knew that they were phases they go through, my 18 year old is doing that now! I still love them though, and they all know it. They make life worthwhile, THAT is why I would do it all over again(and I kind of have, with my younger ones! LOL)
2007-10-25 07:53:20 · answer #7 · answered by RetroDiva65 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Well, my son is only 3 1/2 years old.. so I hope my opinion matters, too...
i wouldn't trade my son for all the money, time, experiences, and vacations in the world!! my son is the reason i live, work, hope and dream the way i do. My son gave me a sense of meaning in life.. my son makes me want to get up in the morning and live life to the fullest. my son has made my life SO MUCH more wonderful then anything else could have ever done for me.
2007-10-25 07:52:21 · answer #8 · answered by *DiZzLe* 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I would do it again. It would be easier if I did it again with what I know now. I love my kids to death and they make life great. Everyone encounters obstacles. They would be there without the children also. I am shocked that there were that many that answered that way. Did they not know that kids cost money and are there forever. They sound pretty selfish to me.
2007-10-25 08:00:48 · answer #9 · answered by kim h 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes I would have them all over again. Yes there is the money they cost and the work it is but I knew that going into it no one says being a parent is a picnic in the park but it has been a blessing and a joy to watch my boys grow to watch them learn and to know that they are great. It has been a joy to have them in my life and I am so thankful for them
2007-10-25 07:53:02 · answer #10 · answered by Kristi S 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋