Men cry means sensitivity women cry mean lack of control....?

Question

I was just reading this article and I wanted to see what others thought of it. Especially this comment.

"Bill could cry, and did, but Hillary can't," says Tom Lutz, a professor at the University of California, Riverside who authored an exhaustive history of crying. In other words, the same tearful response that would be seen as sensitivity in Bill could be seen as a lack of control in his wife.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20071024/ap_en_ot/the_crying_game

So are they saying that women aren't allowed so show emotion because that shows lack of self control? WHat happened in the old days where a man was looked down upon for crying?

What are your thoughts and beliefs? No I'm not a feminist just curious.

Some men cry I've known a few and they aren't gay.

Answer 1

It's pretty simple in politics. Women in power feel the pressure to prove that they are are not ran by emotions. Men in power have to prove that they are human and have emotions. This, to appeal to the masses and make the "right" impression on the public. This is true for the workplace, as well as our personal lives. How much effect does it have when a woman cries? Not much, because it happens frequently. How much effect does it have when a man cries? A whole lot, because you don't see it often.

I'm not about to get on an equality campaign for more men to cry tho'. Women need to learn better coping skills and not break down as frequently and I think men would benefit from being more expressive as opposed to holding it all in---but this is also an individual thing, so I ultimately really don't care.

Answer 2

I read the story and was disappointed they didnt give a few reasons why this perception might exist. For instance women cry A LOT MORE than men and for many more reasons. Men seldom cry and when they do it is for something very close and sentimental more often than not. As the article stated, publicly it is usually a tear or two- a sign of emotion, whereas women are prone to breakdowns of crying hysteria. Women are more emotional than men and I dont think that is a bad thing. We look at the world and deal with its trials in very different ways because we are different- neither is better and neither is worse, just different.

Answer 3

Who really ever notices if a woman cries in public, unless she sobs uncontrollably on national TV over a dog she had for a couple days (that did not die)?

The article has some flaws, but it did point out correctly that the difference is the *reason* for the crying and difference between just "welling up" and sobbing uncontrollably.

What if Jay Leno did what Ellen did? "Mr. Leno, what size would you like your straight jacket in?"

If we figured out that he was not crazy, he would never live it down, ever. Far worse than Tom Cruise' Katie Holmes couch antics on Oprah.

On the other hand, Ellen will live this down in a month or two. The article is simply wrong.

Answer 4

I think everyone is entitled to the right to cry every now and then, man or woman.

My hubby almost never cries so when he does, it really gets my attention. Me, on the other hand, being pregnant and having crazy hormones... I tend to cry more than I should sometimes. If someone (man or woman) cries a lot, it's kind of like playing wolf.

As far as the article goes... I agree w/ Lioness

Answer 5

Nice little story. Beautiful in fact. The story says the father carelessly describing the mother crying for no reason. I guess that depends on the type of man being dealt with. Men are different just like women. Some are more understanding than others.

Answer 6

I read this and was surprised by it too, being that men have a lot more pressure to maintain a strong image. I think that this is just for figureheads, and the image of a woman crying in public over the proverbial spilled milk is still a lot more acceptable in such a situation than that of a man. In a position of authority, however, its reversed, due to the stereotype for a woman to be more emotionally motivated.

Also, I think that since the sight of a man crying is so uncommon, its held as more serious and the sight of a woman is often times derogated because its more common in the media.

Answer 7

I agree with the article. I only cry when I am alone and never in front of another person. I know I would never be able to live it down if I did. Men who cry are viewed as human, women who cry are viewed as pathetic.

Answer 8

It is true you get frowned upon showing any kind of unsettledness (even if it's not crying) as a woman, but it's been that way forever. All of a sudden 'you're too emotional', 'hysterical' and you're not even displaying different emotions than those next to you. It's the same with -any- kind of negative emotion. Anger too. If you show signs of irritability in a room full of men that are irritable against eachother: they'll turn on you asif you're the only person in the room being irritable. For crying: it's a tradition. For anger/ irritability: they're not used to it and you'll catch them by surprise.

Answer 9

It's really tiring sexist stereotypes, that are taking forever to die out. We're human, the average person is going to suffer pain at some time during their lives, and will feel the need to cry. It's a normal reaction, yet men are suppose to suppress it at all costs, and now women are too, if they want to be taken "seriously".

I personally rarely cry, but it's not something I'm proud of; it'd be healthier to cry. Maybe someday we'll just expect men and women to be human, not superhuman drones.

Answer 10

Yeah just read that article too, ain't that something?
Well he is just a big baby and she is out of control, so much for them two, now the issue is that men cry because they can't get it under control, women just cry because they are more sensitive to the world issues and men just don't know what to do, haa, at least women aren't' afraid to let loose, I think men just bottle it up too much and only makes for a ticking time bomb. Well not much on either one just an opinion.