My husband is a salesman with an outgoing talkative personality. He has developed a strong friendship with a client of his that ownes a business two hours away from where we live. My husband talks to this man on the phone several times a week for thiry and forty minutes at a time. This guy calls on weekends too. My husband ussually goes out to lunch with this guys and does special favors as far as business things. Latley they have talked about flipping houses together, going hunting at a camp somewhere and things like that. I have never met this man but my gut tells me that something about him is off. Maybe I'm just over jealouse becasue my husband and I have a very stressed romantic relationship and i rarely get attention and or affection from im in spite of the fact that i am a stay at home mom to our 1 year old, i cook and clean everyday, im hot, I have a good personality but I CAN be a *****...am i over paranoid about him being friends with this guy or am I right to feel neglected.
2007-10-24 15:21:13 · 11 answers · asked by chicwitpurpose 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
He is bored with you. Doesn't think your sexy as a mother. He just does not want to be a parent or a husband. Its about fun and good times. Give him a reality check. Plan a girls trip to Cancun or someplace fun.
Soon you will be the one likely to have an affair of physical or emotional. This is how it starts. His needs are with his buds. You are raising you child and stuck at home. Loneliness could cause you 2-3 years to cross that line.
2007-10-24 15:25:53 · answer #1 · answered by Opps 5 · 1⤊ 2⤋
I think him having a friend and you feeling neglected are two totally separate issues. Of course people develop friendships. It's totally normal and healthy. Have you developed new friendships lately? Honestly, it sounds like you might be letting motherhood swallow you up. Are you the same person he married or have you become a home bound, clingy, nagging wife? What is your passion and are you living it? As a mother of four, I promise you that if you don't have interests and friendships outside of your home you are going to go totally nuts. Many times when women feel like they are lacking attention and affection it's because they are not giving those things to themselves. Men don't make us happy, they just add to our own happiness. Before you nag him again, think about you for a change. Do you think if you were doing the things that made you happy he might seek you out for conversation and affection? Any change within a marriage starts with the person who's having a problem. How will he ever change if you don't first change yourself? Start giving yourself the attention that you crave. Get a sitter on occasion and do something you enjoy. Meet a friend for lunch. I have a feeling your husband might start finding you more interesting and you'll see a change. Good luck :)
2007-10-25 01:05:50 · answer #2 · answered by oracleofohio 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You didn't say how long your husband has been friends with this man... You know it may be a women thing but I've learned as time goes by to trust what your gut is telling you. What i find that is odd is that you have never meet this friend. If your hubby has all that free time to spend with his friend when does he take time for your son? He may be just a yr old but needs his dad's time. Wondering why you have a stressed romantic relationship. If he has time to talk on the phone with this friend why cant he take that time to be with you. That sounds odd to me as well.. I think if i were you then next time hubby goes to visit id go. I really think you need to find out what kind of person it is hes visiting with. Good luck
2007-10-24 22:36:25 · answer #3 · answered by deerlady2000 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you shouldn't necessarily worry about the relationship there but rather get counseling with your husband to find out why you rarely get affection and attention. Perhaps he feels that he has you so he doesn't have to put on a show now and just takes you for granted. the fact is, he shouldn't be neglecting you whether it is for this guy or his job so get him to agree to counseling or leave him and find someone who would appreciate someone who will cook, clean everyday, is hot and has a good personality. Sounds like you could do better but he couldn't!
Good luck to you.
2007-10-24 22:38:04 · answer #4 · answered by Al B 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't even have to work. Deal with it, get a girlfriend that you can talk with. Join a mom's group. Better yet, insist on the two of you, or three b/c of baby, meet up for lunch on the weekend with this dude. Maybe then you will feel better
2007-10-24 23:03:05 · answer #5 · answered by Thomas K 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are right. He sounds passive aggressive. I have experience with that type of person.
Read up on passive aggressive personality disorder and see if you recognize anything. It's a kicker.
try passiveaggressive dot homestead dot com and read the archives on the message boards.
2007-10-24 22:26:24 · answer #6 · answered by Ade 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well, if your gut says there is something wrong then your right there is. Sounds like you and your hubby need to have a long chat about what is important to him and your relationship.....
2007-10-24 22:26:56 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
no you could be the wife of the guy that is having a bi relationship with his buddy on answers , why havnt you met him yet? does your husband carry condums?
2007-10-25 08:28:19 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
if u really feel neglected then you should give him a taste of his own medicine
go out with your girlfriends
take your kid on play dates
go to the park...have a life!!!!!
no offence but just get out there!!!
2007-10-24 22:25:39 · answer #9 · answered by Dani [♥] 4 · 2⤊ 2⤋
Do you think that he is perhaps gay?
or do you really want to spend more time with him.
2007-10-24 22:26:20 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 1⤋