i was just wondering, how would u know if ur man is prince charming and he would stay that way after marriage or if he would turn out to be a abusive husband???? what are the signs????
2007-10-24 12:14:00 · 15 answers · asked by swit_babyangel 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I was married to an abusive husband - the signs were there.. I just misread them.. I took his controlling nature to mean he was "really concerned about me"... I took the way he sometimes got mean with others as "well, he could explain why they made him mad.." I took his jealousy as "oh, he really loves me.." It wasn't until it was over and I looked back that I realized prince charming would put you before himself.. he would give to you (love, attention, kindness) and not take, take, take.. When I look back over the 7 years we were together, I see very few times that he put me or what was best for us before what he wanted.
2007-10-24 12:22:04 · answer #1 · answered by Wildflower 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
The signs are usually pretty obvious: lack of respect for your feelings, trying to control you, substance abuse problems, quick to lose his temper, violent behavior (even if not directed towards you). A lot of abusive men can put on a charming front for a while, but after about 6 months to a year, the true colors usually come out.
2007-10-24 12:20:10 · answer #2 · answered by War Games AM 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
That is what dating is for.
2007-10-24 12:19:21 · answer #3 · answered by box of rain 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If he is abusive it will start out by him trying to control you.He will not like the way you dress or clean house or wear your hair,it always starts out so small that you really dont realize it.Then he will start telling you you are stupid,you dont know any thing and not let you know the finances,then he accuses you of cheating and wont let you work,makes you stay home so people wont see the bruises he will be leaving on you and the black eyes.I have been through that twice when I was young and thank God I finally got out.
2007-10-24 12:30:42 · answer #4 · answered by acr_lover 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If while your dating he makes comments that make you think he is controlling, if so it will be at least 50% worse just before the marriage and 100% after. Things like constantly asking what you have been doing or wanting you at his beck and call saying that he misses you when he can't reach making you think it's cuz he cares.
By the way, if you are questioning it, then yes he is.
2007-10-24 12:23:08 · answer #5 · answered by lucidwillow 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Usually the signs are apparent.....they like to control and they have a very short fuse....taking aggression out by tearing stuff up or throwing things can lead to physical abuse as well.
2007-10-24 12:22:20 · answer #6 · answered by rockerchic821 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
abusive signs are things like, controling, insecurity, paranoid, EVER man handeling you. If you feel he is doing something ever that isn't appropriate or makes you uncomfortable anger anything, and he doesn't permanantly stop after you tell him you feel this way, then follow your gut. DON'T over look the red flags, they only get worse
2007-10-24 12:26:02 · answer #7 · answered by Maalru3 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
sometimes u can look at someones behavior, but usually u can't tell at first. your best bet would be to find out how he treated others in relationships, see how he handles stress, what is his belief system, does he have any anger issues, is he controlling now, does he abuse u either verbally or physically? but usually at first men are on their best behavior, and won't show u that side of them. u just have to get to know someone really well, and pick someone with your moral code, and belief system. also it helps if they have a strong belief in god.
2007-10-24 12:20:18 · answer #8 · answered by jude 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My ex hubby turned out very lazy, he was a binge drinker, if i had a go at him bout his drinking or his laziness i would cop it especially if he was really drunk. He would sleep all weekend on the lounge and not help with anything, he also tried to stop me from seeing my parents and friends!!! He also was very jealous too
If ya want to know more email me and i'll tell you more!!
2007-10-24 12:44:12 · answer #9 · answered by Stephanie C 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The signs are generally obvious from the get go, women just tend to ignore them.
2007-10-24 12:17:15 · answer #10 · answered by CC 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋