Ok, I know I'm going to get a bunch of answers that say I'm crazy, but so be it. I just don't get why people make such a big deal about a spouse sleeping with someone else. IMO the lies and deceit are the negatives of an affair. But sheer sex is simply physical.
For instance, if my wife wanted to have sex with some guy, I personally wouldn't care. And that doesn't mean I don't love her, in fact I love her with everything that I am. It's just that sex is just physical. She feels the same way. And yes, women can sex without emotion just as well as men.
For those that say, "then why get married". Simple, I love her and want to grow old with her. I just don't see a problem with her sleeping with someone else.
2007-10-24 11:29:10 · 20 answers · asked by Bull in a china shop 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Doesn't sound like either of you have acted on this yet but, when you do and, only god knows how long your marriage would last after wards. And if you both are sleeping with others even for just sex. How will you know if she got pregnant who's it is...Or who brought home the STD? Is that going to be forgivable?
Don't get me wrong to each their own just a few questions that came to mind after reading your question...
2007-10-24 11:34:15 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 2⤋
Oh God how many accounts on Yahoo answers are you going to have, TWO or THREE?
You are talking of an open marriage which really defeats the purpose of marriage to me. Marriage is more than just a way to grow old with someone. Alot more and I am sure you realize this. The lies and deceit are not the only negatives to an affair, people get hurt in more ways than that. Might I add that the people you decide to have sex with may not be in that type of relationship and are being deceitful with their partner and you have now contributed to that unless you find single men/women or married men/women in your same type of arrangement.
Sex is just physical to you then but not everyone feels the same about it as you and your wife but alot do.
To each their own.
2007-10-24 11:51:44 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
#1 - You don't love her, because if you did you wouldn't need to have sex with anyone else. Everyone knows it's physical. SO WHAT! You think because it's physical you can justify an affair? That's just your excuse. You just probably need a place to live.
#2 - You're not married. You could say you're married because of some stupid piece of paper, but that is not marriage. You are not a husband and she is not your wife if you two idiots have to have sex with other people.
If that's the unintelligent route you will both be taking with no morals and values, I can predict your future. You certainly will not be growing old together, because you both have no clue what love, marriage, respect and trust even is. Your just another stupid couple that will end up in divorce.
I just hope you have no kids. You can't be a father if you don't know how to be a husband, or a man.
2007-10-24 11:52:59 · answer #3 · answered by Very Honest 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I am a woman. I do not think most women can separate the sexual act from all the emotions that go with it. It's been said that women give sex to get emotional closeness while men give emotional closeness to get sex. Men and women are just different. And I don't understand if it was a purely physical thing, why not just "use" each other for sexual satisfaction? Why would a spouse need to get some outside anyway? You may feel this way now, so free and open, but I have a bad feeling it may turn around and bite you in the future....
2007-10-24 11:37:27 · answer #4 · answered by Linni 6 · 3⤊ 2⤋
Sex is not simply physical in all cases. Isn't it better having sex with someone you love then just having a random screw? Before I even f u c k my man, I already know it's going to be good, I know I'll get off, and there won't be any awkwardness after the fact. What if you slept with someone else and it was terrible and weird after wards? You wouldn't have to see them again, but what a waste of time it would be. And what if they couldn't make you come? You could have gotten a good piece of a s s right at home, with someone you love.
2007-10-24 11:38:48 · answer #5 · answered by cindos_69 5 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Could it be the only reason you don't care if she has sex with other men is, you also want to have sex with other women? I feel if it's not a problem with the both of you then do as you wish. No matter how wrong everyone in here might think it is, it's up to you two to work it out, and please don't bring any kids into it. Good Luck
2007-10-24 11:58:20 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
In a weird way I do agree w/ u... U can have sex which is nothing but a good f*ck...
Or u can make love which is what u do w/ someone u love ...
So as long as u don't confuse the 2 I see ur point and understand what u mean...
However just hope ur "other" doesnt have the sex w/ some1 else to where it can turn into love... people can connect in that way so its kinda scary to do.
2007-10-24 11:53:16 · answer #7 · answered by NONAME 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
You and your wife may feel that "sex" is merely something physical not emotional, that is your views on that matter. Others have different opinions. I don't judge how you live your life since it is your own life after all. Personally for me I would not be able to get in bed with another man just for "sex". It is only something I can do with my emotions involved, meaning it has to be with someone I LOVE and that would be with my husband and only my husband. It's my own personal life choices just like you have yours, our own preferences easy as that. There's always going to be a difference of opinions, as long as you are happy within your relationship it's all that matters.
2007-10-24 11:47:39 · answer #8 · answered by Flower 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Bull why dont you just state that you and your wife are swinger's that way you've clarified why you have this out look on the whole sex with other's ?
There is a HUGE difference in swinging to cheating , so unless you've actually gone through the cheating , your personal opinion dont really count for much , sorry dude .
Enjoy your marriage , enjoy your swinging and remember it's NOT for everyone.
And remember , even swinger's can cheat and fall in love with another sex partner and they can choose to leave , so swinger's are not void of deception they just get to pretend and get away with it longer.
2007-10-24 12:08:11 · answer #9 · answered by JadeyOz 5 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Not a problem It seems that the two of you love each other and having an open marriage seems to work for you guys at least you are up front with each other and if you think about it so many people today cheat on each other anyway so I have to give you thumbs up just keep it safe. So can I get at the wifey or what......lol......do your thing......
2007-10-24 12:01:01 · answer #10 · answered by getatjayr 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋