How Do You Start To Put Yourself Back Together After Being Ripped To Pieces..??

Answer 1

First, I let the rage fuel me. My impetus to get my act together is to spite the person/circumstances that brought me low.

Then I serve myself the brutal truth: What do I really feel? Why am I really hurt? What did I do to help bring myself to bring this point (I'm not to blame, but I feel better knowing what sort of control I had or did not have)? What's the terminal point for all the pain I'm feeling now? What can I control and what can't I control?

In the meanwhile, I reach out for every asset in my reserve - I journal like made, meet up with all my closest friends to discuss, I get medical help if necessary, I make appointments with my therapist, I make myself work out, I feed myself well, I make sure I decrease other stress factors in my life so I have energy to heal, I take an immediate inventory of my finances (some crises impact the pocketbook), etc.

If a person did this to me, living well is the best revenge, and by god I want my vengeance. I will work through this situation as best I can so that I can truly look back a year from now and laugh.

If it was life's circumstance (natural disaster, unforseen medical condition), I remind myself how lucky that I am alive to be miserable, b/c so many people don't get that choice.

I reclaim myself through making decisions for myself instead of wallowing in the helplessness of it all

Answer 2

One of the interesting things about people is that we tend to extend ourselves into things that aren't really "us". When we're little, we naturally attempt to accumulate things. Our possessions become part of "us", and losing possessions becomes painful, horrible. As we get older we start accumulating other things, friendships, relationships, organizations, associations, works, belief systems, all of which we incorporate into that which we call our "selves".

It is painful to loose part of what we think of as part of ourselves. The physical pain of amputation goes away, but the loss of that arm or leg hurts us for a long time afterwards. Losing your house, your relationship, having to accept that your religion is bogus, having to give up working on a favorite hobby, all of these things, spiritually speaking, are just like amputations. It's a loss of something that was part of ourself.

Putting yourself back together afterwards, picking up the pieces and moving on, is really a matter of letting go, reassessing what you have left, and putting one foot in front of the other (metaphorically speaking if you really DID suffer amputation).

Another interesting thing about humans is that we will almost always find things to replace chunks that were ripped off. An interesting survey of the happiness level of people who lost a limb compared to those that won the lottery is that, a year after the event, there was no difference at all. They were both about as happy as the other. Weird, huh? The hard part is getting to that point where it no longer matters. Just keep yourself going, and things will fix themselves.

Answer 3

I agree with Buttercup's answer! That is some excellent advice! :o) I would also like to add that you also just take one piece at a time & with time & the support of good friends & family you will be able to put yourself back together. You will be able to make yourself whole again & make it through this tough time. That is what I did...take care :o)

Answer 4

You start by picking up the most important and valuable pieces first, and start to put them back in places, strong family and friends to help hold the pieces in place while they are mending, dealing with it by taking one step at a time, one day at a time!!

Answer 5

You have to take care of your health, that has to be your priority in life. Your health is the most important thing because without it you can't work and support yourself.

I'm thinking about my friend's wife, she's suffers from depression. Right now she's living in a board and care center. Before that she was living in a hospital.

I don't know about you but this is not the way I want to live my life. I don't plan on living in a hospital or institution the rest of my life.

Answer 6

you know, i was thinking about this. honestly, i think it's a choice. you can either continue doing the same crap or try to reach out for help. i haven't quite decided what i want to do. days i could care less and do some pretty stupid crap and yet i wake up the next morning. other days, i have an different attitude about life. i'm going to be fun and flirty. damnit i'm going to enjoy this life. but, i don't know how you permanently stay there. maybe through support? good question though.

Answer 7

You have to have a understanding why it happened first, then try talking to someone close to you to share your feelings with. Don't ever blame yourself, and try to get on with life slowly and time will help you put things back together again

Answer 8

someone caring has to put your fallen pieces close together and is willing to help you get back to whole. enough determination, though, could give you the adrenaline to bring yourself to what you were, but then again, if you fix yourself without a mirror or someone to spot you, you'll honestly look disfigured

Answer 9

Ok first you have to get it all out of your system. Cry, scream, throw things do whatever you have to to get all the hurt and anger out. Then you have a nice long talk with yourself, spend some time alone. Then go out , let your hair down and party like you never did before.

Answer 10

I use the emotions and i do something to express the emotion with a song or a drawing. With the lyrics and the pictures the pieces of me become one again =]