what do i do about this people..( husband troubles?

Question

me and my hubby been having issues abt him lying.AND i just had a baby 3 weeks ago. i left one day earlier than him to go to my parents house and he came after. so after 14 days we came home. i went online and he had deleted the history and changed the settings to 12 days.i know sumthing is up. so when he comes in the room i ask him u have one hour to come clean about the websites u visited or what u did online. i said i know where u been but want to hear from u. so he starts crying and begging me that he didn;t go anywhere. he was crying really bad. it was exactly like what he did when i caught hi couple of months earlier with his myspace account listing himself single. but this time he was like show me what u are taking about. i didn't go nowhere. the only thing i had was his temporary internet files. so i deleted his history before him to make him seem like i know alot. i am so lost, i am at fault too. i let his couple of loving words get to me. and i melt. i don't have no solid ...

proof. what shuld i do.????? i mean i had no proof but he didn't know that he started crying like i caught himwhat shuld i do. he will never come clean

Answer 1

If you really suspect him as doing bad things or visiting bad sites online, there are some great programs you can use. No matter him deleting history, "keylogger" will save and show everything that has been TYPED on the computer. Also, you can buy or set up a parental control program to block certain websites and make sure he's not on them. As childish as it seems, it will prove to you what he really does.


http://www.awarenesstech.com/monitoring-software/consumer/keystroke-logger.html?utm_campaign=keylog/keystroke&utm_source=yahoo&utm_medium=cpc&utm_content=keylogger&utm_term=key+logger+program&s_kwcid=TC-2567-21452417021-S-2247891521

That's the keylogger program.


http://www.advancedparentalcontrol.com/

That's a parental control program.

Answer 2

This is so very hurtful. Not everybody is aware of the Internet being, like your eyes are called; the window to your soul, it is sometimes possible it corrupts the eyes view. He maybe with wholesome intention, it may not be all his fault, as his guilt is profound and obvious. It is important that you stop thinking that he is up to no good. Is he good in other matters involving you and the baby? He may have done something that he himself is trying to erase. Let it be for now. If indications lead you to determine he is a flat out liar then take measures to try and save your marriage with your faith counsel or simply understand that you may have given your hand to the wrong man. Really, you can't kill him. The computer can be a real demon. You must forgive. Be the super being in this scenario, do not put so much energy into detective work, save it for your well being and as a direct result for your baby's. Even though the baby is very young, baby just came from where God is to join us all in this human tragedy. Baby is being introduced to its mother, father and planet school. Be happy at home, peace in your path...

Answer 3

Oh, man..........If it weren't for the baby I'd say kick is butt OUT! It sounds like he's a real snake!

I can't advise you, but I CAN tell you my personal experience. I had a very dishonest, abusive husband, and whenever we had a major fight he would cry like a little baby and I would give right in. Stupid, stupid, stupid. I found out AFTER the divorce that every time he did it he would LAUGH to his friends about doing it and how crying worked like a charm.

Like I said, if it weren't for the baby..........

Can you get him to go for counseling? If not, just lay down the law and stick to it. FIRST time he messes up, head back to your mom's. And be prepared for him to be really sneaky....like creating new accounts on different websites that need a password. If you've got a REALLY computer savy friend, maybe they can help you keep tabs on him by peeking at his computer while he's at work. Maybe install some type of spyware? I don't know what it's called, but it takes a "snapshot" of every page he's been on.

Good luck. Sounds like you have your hands full.

:(

Answer 4

So you just have a suspicion. But he has listed himself as single before? I really think his reaction says it all. Maybe he went to a porn site? Some people are ashamed of that and some wives really don't like their husbands going to those sites. I understand that. In fact, my boyfriend knows that if he is going to look at porn he better do it when I am not home to be able to walk in and "catch him red handed". I personally, don't have a problem with porn I know men are visually stimulated but I do have a problem with him looking at porn when I am at home and easily available to statisfy his needs. That being said, since you had a baby 3 weeks ago do you think it is possible that he views you as a mother right now and is having a hard time thinking of you sexually? This could be a possibility and it is normal. Alot of men have a hard time at first because emotionally they have been through alot as well. The sexual desire for their wife usually returns pretty quickly. I would just speak your piece, let him know what is on your mind and tell him what you expect of him. He should be able to respectful of your wishes and understand that sometimes it can be very hurtful thinking your spouse doesn't want you.
I also would say because you just had a baby you have alot of hormones racing through your body and they can cause you to blow things out of preportion.
Just be careful and understand that bringing a baby home is an adjustment for the entire household, it is possible your husband is still comming to terms with being a mature person and juggling his new roles of being a father, husband and lover.

Answer 5

Sweety, your marriage needs work on both of your parts. Sit down with your husband, don't be accusatory or on the offensive, and at the same time you need to be confident and sure of yourself and not let him pass on what needs to be done. Tell him you are wiling to forgive him, but he needs to be completely honest with you from this point forward and put forth the effort to fix what is wrong. When a couple has a baby, the sex changes and the intimacy you both need is missing, he probably has gone to look for it elsewhere, and he needs to know that you still want him that way, so let him know how you feel. Try not to get what he has been up to out of him, just let it go and stay gone, unless he continues with his promiscuous behavior.

Answer 6

You have explained what he does but you have not actually explained why he is doing this, there is often a reason behind such things and mainly the reason is always that the person does not get any attention from their partner, but if this is not the case you should ask him why he is being silly but I do not think you should worry at this time especially when you just have become a mother and as for him being the father should also think that you do not like it and he has other responsibilties, I reccomend that you should talk to him and ask his problem for doing this because he will deny it once, twice but not the third time.

wish you luck

Answer 7

It is especially hard for you if you just had a baby.. Your hormones are working overtime.. I would advise him that if he is going to be doing things on the computer that you are not aware of then it will be disconnected.. or another opion is to have him go for counseling to see what issues he has.Some husbands find that when the new baby comes home they feel jealous sometimes.. so pay a little bit attention to him and see if it helps.. This is something you must deal with now or it will just gets worse.. good luck.. and concrats on the baby...

Answer 8

Solid proof of what? What kind of proof do you need, and what kind of action are you prepared to take once you have that "proof"? It sounds to me like you already know that he's up to something you consider unacceptable. It is likely that he will continue doing whatever it is he's doing, and you will continue to obsess over it, checking his history and whatnot. I suppose, you could install the keylogger-type software on the computer, to track all activities. You can collect your "proof" and confront him with it. But are you prepared to stand up for yourself? How far do you go in spying on your own spouse before you finally say - "enough's enough"? I know you're feeling hurt right now, and it's hard to think clearly; but try and figure out for yourself roughly where you would be prepared to draw the line. How many chances are you going to give him?

Answer 9

Liars are sacs of only- crap. Throw them all out of your life and live for yourself = be much happier. Or you can spend the rest of your life with that person feeling depressed and worried all the time. Then if you ever do get out of the relationship you'll be drained mentally and it could take years to spring back. No one is worth it- not even the father of your children. How can you be a good mother when you having to put up with such petty crap? Get out get out get out. That's all there is to it. Can't find a way? Ask God to help because he loves you and your child more than any man ever will. Trust me it works.

Answer 10

Oh goodness! i'm uncertain i could desire to bypass as quickly as a month... Has he constantly been this style? i could have maximum of questions if he hasn't "constantly" been like this. i be attentive to from 2 of my sister-in-regulations that the two one among my brothers have been as quickly as a month form of fellows. My oldest brother went so a great way as going to his pcp and a therapist to verify why his sexchronic became into so low. there are a number of motives for a guy of that age to have little want for making love, yet while it quite is meddling with your sexual want i could say some thing or ask if he could be keen to verify a expert? i could notwithstanding fret if this habit is a few thing new... i could suspect that he became into cheating or being untrue? And by utilising cheating i don't propose that he's inevitably having "intercourse" with yet another lady, yet i could be careful. stable success to you and your intercourse life!! :D