i want a divorce but my wife is not ready for it, i am an indian?

Question

my wife doesnt take care of me as she was having an affair before our marriage n left him as his family was not ready, we r married for 6 years but now i have realised that she's not worth for me as she's only passing time with me as i am rich, we have a 4 years old son, my mom n dad are 65 n 70 years old, they still work for the house, mom prepares food for all day n night but she doesnt helps her in that, mom n dad are getting down day by day n i am worried, i want a divorce now so that i can marry someone else who can care for them n for me, we r prepared if she takes the kid with her, i asked her for a divorce but shes not ready to leave the house, i cant stay with her n i decided with my mom n dad that i shud leave the house n live separately from her, i am now living in the same colony but separate from her, how can i get a divorce? i know that living separately for 6 months can help me, what shud i do after 6 months n how much time after that it will take in getting me the decre

she only wants diamonds n daily outing for a movie or a dinner,

for Ms. nikki read carefully i said she doesnt take care of me as well, wat our families final verdict on which she is ready was WE WILL NOT INTERFERE IN EACH OTHER'S LIFE, how can a wife say this

Answer 1

To get decree of divorce you will need ten years if she is not prepared to give her free will & consent for divorce by mutual consent. Who told you after you live away from her for six months you can go to Family court & seek divorce from her? People around ,knowing nothing of the legal provisions are busy misguiding others,& when the real legal provisions are told to them, then they shy away from going ahead. Even if you are looking for divorce from her on the ground of desertion it has to be at least two years separate living & that too if she goes out of this matrimonial home, not you. You cannot move out of this matrimonial home & ask for divorce after two years on the ground of your living separately from her for two years. You cannot take advantage of your wrong in this case & pray for decree of divorce, no family court will grant you such a relief in the form of decree of divorce. Now what all you can do in such a case? Firstly engage a lawyer for yourself, secondly try settle with her for divorce by mutual consent, and thirdly try collecting evidence with regard to her cruelty so that at least you can move the family court for divorce or judicial separation on the ground of her cruelty against you. Lastly always consult a lawyer for legal opinion even if you have to pay him for all this & not general public who may not be aware of the legal provisions with regard to any dispute.

Answer 2

Mr. rahul s, while sympathising with your situation, I must say that the question(s) that you have asked here can be best answered by a lawyer. These relate to legal aspects and only a qualified and experienced lawyer can answer your question(s) satisfactorily. In order to seek a unilateral divorce from your wife, you have to file a divorce suit in a court of law and thereby engage the services of a lawyer anyway. Why don't you consult a lawyer right away? He/she will not only answer your questions, but also suggest effective ways so that it is easy for you to get the divorce. And do go to a reputed lawyer. They are more expensive, but deliver the results.
The answers that you have already received are in my opinion more confusing than helpful. It is generally known that a separation of 6 months is essential for divorce. But there might be other conditions attached too. Quite a few Americans have answered your question and tried to show that they have superior wisdom in such matters. What they have effectively revealed is that illiterate Indian rickshaw pullers have better common sense than the average American graduate.

Answer 3

For the legal details and advice, you do have to consult a lawyer, and not go by advice you get here. But, other options, sometimes you get a useful input from strangers like us, who knows!

Reading your question, it looks like your parents are a part of your family, most likely been there since the beginning of your marriage, and they have a very active say in your marital decisions.

I would suggest, move back into your house. Have your parents move out, and stay in same colony nearby, atleast temporarily. That will give you both some breathing space, and some much needed privacy. That will also give your mother and father a break from working for the house and your wife. There will be no one your wife can rely on for cooking and perhaps taking care of your son. That might get her to straighten up.

Start taking some decisions independently. "i decided with my mom n dad" does not sound very grownup for a person with a 4 yr old son.

Her affair was before marriage. She left him. How is that responsible for her not taking care of you? don't bring up the past. what happened before marriage is none of your business. If she told you about the affair before marriage, great. Even if she didn't, if she has been faithful after marriage, that is her choice. She is the mother of your child, atleast give her the respect of not bringing up the past.
you start your question with mention of her 6 yrs back affair.
is this also discussed at home sometimes? Why?

I would say, move back. have ur parents move out. make her the queen of hte house, kitchen with maid servants to boss over and manage.

Answer 4

Wow. This is a tuff situation. In Indian society its not right to get a divorce more like a huge impact an Indian sociey, BUT u must follow your heart because that will lead to true happiness. Dont let society dominate how u feel.

Answer 5

Go back to the house for your parents sake. Tell her to leave the house and when she has a place to live she can come for your son to stay with her sometimes. Don't leave your parents to her. I would go file now and list what are to be extenuating circumstances. Explain that it's a mutual decision to leave the marriage. That she's lazy and doesn't help around the home. She doesn't cook or clean. That you don't want a trophy wife but want a person that will share equally as a life partner. If you need to pay for her to live separately until she can find work, that would be of benefit. But, don't leave your parents with her. Make her go stay somewhere else.

Answer 6

WOW! Can't you hire a maid if you're rich? and can't she try to be more loving to your parents? The grass is not always greener on the other side of the fence, so think about what might make things better for your parents without tearing your whole life apart and starting over. Try to get your wife to be a team player for the sake of everyone's happiness, including her own.

Answer 7

Depending on the country you live in, it may not matter if she's ready or not. In America, you can file for divorce without her permission, and the court will decide who gets ownership of the house. If you win, you can have her arrested for trespassing, or you could simply sell the house and move to a new one.

Answer 8

Have you ever talked to her openly about the problem and let her know very calmly how you feel about her attitude. Open communication and expressing yourself in a respectfull manner can get her to listen to you with a view to understanding your concerns. And think about the future of your children, they have to grow up without their mother. You don't have to be a statistic in the Divorce Rate. So try talking and make your marriage work.

Answer 9

what guarantee's you the happiness/care from the proposed 2nd marriage.
your parents are already old
you are a rich man
your wife don't want to divorce you????
you have a 4 year old kid
what Else you need ???- concentrate on your richness and try to accommodate your wife

don't spoil the future of your son - every human should dedicate something for the future.

Answer 10

are you sure this isnt something you guys can work out? have you tried talking to her? are you ready to give up your son......what will happen to him and his future?
but if you have made up your mind and want a divorce, then you need to get an attorney right away. the attorney will tell you how to handle things from this point on. good luck